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Recent Blog Posts
I know a lot of people in my age bracket who are dating and their stories are disheartening. I'm not on dating apps. I'm just living my life and doing what I love, believing that if my person is out there, we will find each other eventually.
I led a hike on the Appalachian Trail this past Saturday. I met a lot of nice people, but really enjoyed talking to one guy. We had a lot in common and he mentioned that he's part of a theater group (does lighting) that is doing a play based on a book I love. I looked it up when I got home and this is the last week it's running.
Have y'all ever noticed just how annoyingly insecure Bio/Disney parents are the moment you address your concerns how overly child-centric they are and how that behavior negatively affects your adult relationships?
Stable Step-Parent: "I would like a schedule of your parenting times"
Delusional Disney Parent: "You're trying to keep me from spending time with my kids"
Stable Step-Parent: "Your kids need to clean up behind themselves"
Delusional Disney Parent: "You're trying to treat my kids like sl@ves!"
Normally, I feel better after a therapy session, but after yesterday, I don't. I feel more anxious and uncertain. My T and I talked about the issues lately with SS13. She hasn't met SS, but she does have a background working with kids in that age group. She's always really good about not putting labels on things, not directing me one way or another, just giving insight, guidance and helping me work through things to come to my own decisions and conclusions. But yesterday, I chronicled the issues and my feelings.
She said:
So it has been about 8 months since I have last posted. Hard to believe. And here I am still in pain. You would have to go back and read my previous blogs, but the short of a long story is that my fiance left me and my daughter (who he helped raise for 8 years) on Christmas Day 2022, unexpectedly. He left the house we own together and left me with all of the financial upkeep and maintenance. He got a tiny apartment and invited his youngest adult mentally ill daughter to live with him. (He regrets leaving.
Yes, folks, today is the day that 5 years ago, my relationship with the XBF was escalated from friendship to a relationship, but our "anniver-whatever" has been a bone of contention since the beginning.
Although BM is and always has been the driver behind the skids' god-awful behavior, the skids are well into adulthood, so I haven't given BM much thought over the past several years. In fact, when I learned a few years ago that she had been doing well financially, I thought, good--she should be ok in retirement. I noted her attempts at "buying" more "love" and devotion (kind of sealing the deal) from the now-grown skids, but, well, it didn't surprise me, so it was just another thing.
Let me start out by saying that I am a long time Lurker and First TIme Poster. Hard to believe, but I didnt realieze I Had tentatively signed up to be a member 13 years ago. I must have been too chickenshit to post anything even though I really needed the support. Maybe I was too still too worried about being found out or so cyncial that I thought Id still get backlash. No offense to anyone. I Have no idea what took me so long to break my silence here. There is just wayyy too much to unload here and feeling too overwhelmed and burnt out to have the strength to get into everything.
Mothers Day is one of those potential emotional bomb fields for stepmoms, especially those with the stepkids living with them full time. In the perfect world, we'd receive some flowers and a nice card with a few kind words. Too often, nothing. I'm sure none of us are greedy for gifts, we just want some acknowledgment and thanks one day of the year for performing the difficult task of raising a child who isn't ours.
Surprisingly I'm not referring to ungrateful skids ... ranted about them two Mother's Days ago when that staunch Disneyland dude had the gall to take his beastly breeders parenting day, declare it as his, took his kids shopping for the itchB, then expected me to forego my cushy day of relaxation and peace so that his unruly demanding peace destroying spawns could invade my territory on one of the few days of the year I fully expect those kids to fall back because it's not about them or their breeder (while at my home) being a priority like the other 363 days of the year.
DH called out SD14 yesterday for her out right MEAN and DISTURBING comment about my dog.
I heard my dog throw up in the other room and yelled, "Oh no, was that ____? Did she just throw up?"
SD14, who is in the den, proceeds to say to my dog "____ you should go outside in the thunderstorm and sacrafice yourself."
DH: "Well, THAT'S mean. Why would you say a thing like that???"
SD: "Geez, I was just joking." *eyeroll*
DH: "Don't roll your eyes at me."
SD: "What, she's just a dog."
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