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SO and I have been on vacation for a week and it has been pretty great. Only a few hiccups in the beginning because he insisted SD pet sit and she was having some issues . Well yes because we need a professional who cares about the pets to watch them. But it didn't take up too much of our time and SO was upset with how SD was handling it but I told him there is nothing we can do at this point. But now we will be heading back to reality where I am sure he will start on me again about going to all of his kids things.
Welll, after much thought and of course reading all the comments on my last post, I spoke with my parents on the issue as well. I even spoke with the neighbor gal. She thinks its pretty shady that the kids not working and not in (free) college. Her new take on things is maybe Toxic Troll is lying about SD18s age to keep her a minor so that she can keep that section 8 nezt by the beach.
Gathering my thoughts.
Husband and I had a BIG talk about the situation with SD18 Princess Powersulk Do Nada, Our lady of Inertia, goddess of Sloth.
Hey everyone, I'm sort of new to this site and I've been on here before reading your stories but I'm new to posting so here goes. DW and I have been together for 13 years (Married for 10) and she has two kids from her previous relationship and we have three kids together (twins 10, 7). At the time SS23 was 9 and former SS (Who would be 21 now) was 6 when I first met her. DW and her ex had a really on and off toxic marriage to say the least. When it finally ended they pretty much hated each other.
I couldn't sleep last night, and i ended up going down a Reddit rabbit hole. Ended up on a forum where the advice ranged from "Don't do it! You'll regret it, ask me how i know!" to "It can work if you are mature, know your boundaries, communicate well, and don't have a lot of insecurity and jealousy."
Sounds familiar, but the forum was actually advice between members of the Marine Corps about marrying a stripper or sex worker. The similarities between the advice on there and the advice given to stepparents weirded me out. What does it all mean?!
Not sure if anyone remembers my last post it was almost a year ago, BM accused me of hurting SD. This was a split second accusation which was quickly squashed but not once did i get an apology.. Since then i had taken a huge step back as a step mum. Which in turn has now caused us to end. Bit of a back ground, BM is the most toxic, abusive, narcassistic piece of s*** to ever walk this earth. Gives us Bio mums a bad name! One rule for her and one rule for everyone else.
My 14 year relationship is coming to an end. I ended it. But I am absolutley devestated and it has taken every ounce of strengthI had left to stay strong on this. We have fought so many times and told each other we were done but it never lasted long. But it's now been almost 5 days since we have spoken and I'm trying to stay strong because part of me feels like this is what i need to do and everyone in my life agrees. But I've been told everything is my fault for so long that I can't help but question now that maybe it partly is.
Long story short - my partner and I have full custody of his 14 year old daughter for the last 5 years. BM has never paid a cent in child support & when I bring it up partner gets upset, because BM is very unstable & not in SD life due to trauma, drugs... so she pulls the pity card and he falls for it.
This past weekend (Thursday-Sunday) I took SD to Miami. I've been there multiple times with friends and assumed (keyword) SD17 would enjoy it.
While it wasn't overall terrible it wasn't really fun either... This was officially my last trip with skid/skids. We haven't taken SSs on vacation since they were 17/18.
I think these kids just don't know how to have fun anymore... I went to the jersey shore when I was 18 with my friends family and we had a blast. Granted SD was just with me she just was boring TBH. One thing I do know how to do... it's have fun.
So, in my adventures of life post graduation and 18, Princess Powersulk Do Nada, Our Lady of Inertia, goddess of Sloth hasnt done that much differently. Im just expecting things to be different, but they arent. Except child support is no longer going out 'da house.
Ive tried everything I could think of:
1. Task delegation
2. Asking arrival departure times/days
3. Printing out "how to get your id" and higlighting with added sticky notes.
4. Fake crying "this is stressing me out! I cant handle the powersulking!"
I was on a FB page about narcissists and came across this:
When you don't allow people to walk all over you anymore, the narrative will change. You'll become the villain in their story because you won't be giving them what they have no problem taking from you. But at least in your story, you'll be free.
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