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Now that I'm back in StepHell and I'm fully disengaged, this has uncovered some deep fears I have had for years about the future. DH is nearly seven years older than I am, and there is a very good chance that I will outlive him.
I'm terrified of what that could mean for me.
The Subtraction Method theory recieved a LOT of popularity on another blog in this forum when I posted about it and from there I thought it needs to have it's own blog...I REALLY enjoy hearing stepparents tell how they have adopted their own version of the subtraction method. To note - this theory is coming from yours truly, a fellow stepparent and although I have dubbed it the "subtraction method" this is really something many veterans inherently do and have gone on WAY before my time...but this is an excellent step OUT of stepmartyrdom.
Thank you for tolerating my wanderlust and constant pursuit of change and adventure. Going forward I will try to avoid chainsaw massacre motels in the middle of nowhere and Mob hit man hotels in cities. I promise.
I love you beyond measure.
143!
Rags
This time on my own has helped me realized my limitations when dealing with men with kids
First of all, I never intended to deal with men with underage kids that live with for the exact reasons I ended enduring so now know that this absolutely a dealbreaker with the only exception being men who are earning 7 figures and compensate me for the work dealing with their industrial grade baggage
UPDATE...well well..imagine that. Take SD's phone and poof her room is spotless in about 90 minutes. Hmm...IMAGINE THAT. I'm just pissed off I had to get involved and I had to lose my crap. Waiting for SD to ask me for her phone. I'm not offering it up.
SD is the last kid that lives here and she is just like Beaver a complete and utter SLOB. I have asked for months for SD to clean her room. DH asks her to and then SD says "She is working on it" but it is still a giant mess. When I say mess, food all over, makeup all over, clothes everywhere, etc.
Totally new to this and could really use some advice. We recently returned from our first blended family vacation. For the most part it was awesome except for one person. My SD is a very difficult personality. Off and on I have been treated like I do not exist. Her language and behavior is very excluding and the dismissiveness never ends.
My SD6 has never asked to spend less time with us (we have her 50%) nor does she complain or get upset when with us. There is certainly a good 1/2 hour to hour of "detox" when we first get her as her biomoms influence can make her sassy/rude/distant. So there have been occasions when she is crying not to leave mom when we first get her but it's literally within minutes that she is fine and her normal happy self. I believe she feels some of it but I also believe some of it is for mom's sake and approval. It makes bio mom so happy to see her baby cry for her.
SD61 came over to give DH87 a birthday gift. He was looking forward to her visit. We've recently been discussing the need for cleaning help and I agreed to give her a chance. I really want a professional but he wants to give her an opportunity to earn the $ and I agree she's very clean. I had reservations about her health but thought we'd see. We planned to discuss with her today
Ah, Aniki and all,
My beloved Dad (Stepfather but more dad than any bio guy in humanity) was hospitalized yesterday with congestive heart failure. He is now completely blind and his hearing is practically gone. Oh, how I love this man! He has supported me and my 7 siblings for decades and is our hero.
...why are Disneyland parents the main ones willfully obtuse about the impact of their, their meddling exes, and their spawns behavior on current relationships/marriage
Then be acting even more dumbfounded and "blindsided" when you reach your limit and leave
Should Disneyland parenting style be considered a mental disorder? Considering how it negatively impacts home/marriage/other kids/etc