OMG!!!! I'm now the abusive stepmum?????
After lulling me into a false sense of security, my BM has surpassed herself. My poor SD 10 has been ordered and had to contact her dad, my H, and tell him that she is no longer allowed to see him while he's married to me! SD13 has done a fantastic number on me. Now to her defence we did have some awful arguments. H and I mostly where she got insulted. Some she heard some my H told her. But he does NOT deserve this. Neither do I. My heart breaks for my poor SD10. She adores her dad and has worked hard to overcome her jealousy towards me. Even admitting it to me and asking me to help her not feel like that. I am devastated, she has even reported me to the police. ( they have said it is not a criminal case) but I don't trust her to lie. I feel like running away.what should I do??? My H is actually defending me and saying ignore it all, the kids will nag her to give in, but I'm not so sure.
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Your H says to ignore her
Your H says to ignore her calling the cops on you??? Nice. Guess its not his reputation that's at stake here.
Who reported you to the police? SD? How about in the future you ignore your H's advice. He's probably trying to protect his daughter from charges for filing a false police report. I would file charges on my SS if he ever called the cops on me and made false allegations. I don't care if it ended my relationship. My career and my reputation are all I have.
It was BM that filed a log.
It was BM that filed a log. Don't think there were any charges to be answered. I think he means he's going to ignore her ultimatum of divorce me or lose your kids. This is just one of many threats and repeated court dates. He is ALWAYS given access, she always complies for a while then makes something up. He thinks it is one of those times, I think that with SD13 and her bitter nonsense she may actually follow through. I work in care and I have a baby! Does she not care about them??. At this moment, even with Hs ( may only be temporary) support, I feel like giving in to them. She will do this to whomever he is with, but after 4 years of witch hunting, lies character assassination and tormenting of my kids I have had enough. He's finally standing by me and it has caused a tsunami of reaction. I just don't know that I'm strong enough.
Do I need one? Surely they
Do I need one? Surely they need proof of something?? He is being made to choose between me and his kids again!! I know he will choose me but at what cost? Not making excuses for him but he must be wishing he had never married me!
Verbal. She was taking sexy
Verbal. She was taking sexy photos of herself and posting them on a photo site. At 13 I felt H should be more concerned than he was and I said he may not mind her acting like a s..t but I do. One of about four arguments that had me losing it after her behaviour or lying and him chastising me while she was there. She lived with us for two years and this took place in the last three months. Very hard to explain but after I saw through her ( took me 18 months) she pushed every button I had. And at first I Still didn't see what she was doing. I took a step back a while ago. I didn't like the screaming person I was becoming. Not once though in her inboxes to H since moving back to BMs has she mentioned me. This had come our of the blue. Maybe I am in the wrong.
Take a deep breath. Breathe.
Take a deep breath. Breathe. You're in the UK, right? Police are very cautious to react in domestic cases. Police have said this is not a criminal case, right? Your H is standing by you. Let it pkay out.
No not legally but BM is
No not legally but BM is saying he cannot see his children while still married to me. I am just an excuse. We have been here three times a thousands o pounds already. The difference this time is SD13 is lying about me. Don't think we can financially or emotionally go through the legal battle again. SD13 and BM have spent the last four years trying to destroy our marriage. Really don't know why. But I now have a baby and my BD to think of. I feel that I should just leave and let him spend the rest of his life being controlled by them. Access arrangements in England have to be enforced by a court so basically she can do what she wants if we are not able to fund it.
No not legally but BM is
No not legally but BM is saying he cannot see his children while still married to me. I am just an excuse. We have been here three times a thousands o pounds already. The difference this time is SD13 is lying about me. Don't think we can financially or emotionally go through the legal battle again. SD13 and BM have spent the last four years trying to destroy our marriage. Really don't know why. But I now have a baby and my BD to think of. I feel that I should just leave and let him spend the rest of his life being controlled by them. Access arrangements in England have to be enforced by a court so basically she can do what she wants if we are not able to fund it.
I know, but it is the
I know, but it is the constant pressure on my marriage and my mental state. Had two years of SD13, and now the tag teaming with BM just to make us divorce. Feel like I should leave.
He has been given the x time.
He has been given the x time. She has decided not to allow. It's up to to us to go back to court to enforce. But I don't think we can financially do it. I will not be the reason why he doesn't see his kids. The little ones are only 5,8 and ten. SD13 has made her own bed.
Still costs us court fees.
Still costs us court fees. Last time we went through this was 2011. BM was compliant while SD13 lives with with us but now she has her back then back to normal. And now they are tag teaming us as SD 13 has stated that she doesn't want her dad married again.
Maybe I'm being weak but
Maybe I'm being weak but between SD13 and BM I'm exhausted. Will they ever stop????