Not taking her side at all but I see nothing wrong with sunscreen or with a kid wanting to wear it...especially if she freckles.

My SKids tan but they burn too. Usually, at the end of summer, they look like they have been bronzed. However, if they don't wear sunscreen, they burn...yes, it heals into a tan but the burn still isn't healthy for them.

Nasty refused to use sunscreen on them last year and their faces were SPLOTCHY from the burning and peeling...this was when they were spending their 4 days with her in the pool.

You are wrong....Sunscreen should be used every day....Just put the sunscreen on her if she wants it. That is half the battle with kids....Her mom is trying to do the right thing and prevent wrinkles and freckles for her when she is older. Good for her...

FYI my 1st DH died from skin cancer at 38, if his mom had used sunscreen at this age, he might not have spent years battling melanoma.

I would have been pissed if someone didn't put sunscreen on my kids. I lit in to the incubator for not putting it on FSS6 as well when he came home with sunburn. Why wouldn't you do that? Am I missing something here, do you want to have a sun burned kid?

When FSD came for the weekend she had a handheld mirror and a sunblock stick for her face and tells us that mommy taught her how to put on suntan lotion so that she doesn't have to rely on me or FDH.
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As I BM I would have done the same thing. I mean really? why not let the kid put on sunscreen?

So, basically, your FDH is too damn lazy to put the sunscreen on and then blamed it on you by claiming you said something you didn't.
Niiice.
The problem here is 100% your FDH.
I can't believe you think BM was being a bitch. I don't get it.
I'm pretty impressed she taught SD had to put sunblock on herself since her father is clearly not going to do it.

As a birth mother, I have to tell you, the attitude about BMs on this site is appalling. We are the go-to scapegoats for everyfuckingthing. How many times have I read Not My Kid Not My Problem. It came back to bite you on the ass.

This BM taught her daughter how to apply sunscreen because her FATHER and her STEPMOTHER wouldn't. How can you possibly be pissed that she evinced "not my kid, not my problem" when that is precisely what you believe? If not you personally then stepmothers collectively. It's what they PREACH. It's their best ADVICE. It's how they tell the winners from the losers.

Ironically, because it's up to fdh to put sunscreen on his daughter, it's also up to him to let BM know that she shouldn't accuse you of "not my kid, not my problem" because...she's not your kid and it's not your problem!

Maybe it's the hard-assed position that's the problem.

I agree with the other posters who say FDH is setting you up to be the evil stepmother. BM is not a bitch. Fdh is a jerk.

Confession: Yesterday I thought DH put sunscreen on the kids, and DH thought I did it... end result NEITHER of us did it, and all 3 of them are now have SLIGHT sun burns. I felt so guilty about it last night that it was hard to fight back the tears. My oldest daughter doesn't burn, but since when does skin cancer only attack those that "burn". It is equally as bad for kids who tan, as it is for kids who burn.

The sunblock now sits on the counter next to the slider and is to be applied BEFORE the kids step foot outside. I am usually REALLY good about putting sun block on our kids ALL of them. In fact I am the mom that is out ON THE FIELD before baseball games putting sun block on EVERYONES kids. That's just me...