Holy crap! I guess some people are right to delete their post after so many days.....glad I went through mine the other day....I am going to go back double check mine.

How in the world did they find you on facebook?

I certainly hope not. I know that you have a lot of great friends on this site.

I don't know if we are FB friends or not (have to admit I still can't keep everyone straight name wise) BUT

Absolutely crazy unbelievable what people will do to cyber harass you. I'm going to guess that this "Brandon Riley" person is BM or related to BM? Sorry if there's no BM and I haven't read up to find out, but obviously it's someone with a personal vendetta. I can't imagine anyone on here would have one, BUT can imagine someone would come here looking for us who had one, join up and pretend to be friends with us. Anything is possible. And anyone can read/copy our blogs without even joining or friending us.

Oh Jojo...

So sorry this happened to you.
I am to a point where I don't care personally, and my DH knows about this site and the borderline site anyway, so no one could "blackmail" or harass me that way. Suppose they could alter my blogs to say things like that and cut and paste. That's why I don't think anything anyone sends via email holds up.

BM passed away but a family member???

This is scary, we all bare our souls here knowing that we are sharing our innermost thoughts with others who are likely to understand. It must make you feel like you are being stalked. Is there no way of tracing this nutter?

Stand up for your marriage and don't let anyone come between you and your family. Don't let him think that he's got control, whoever the hell he is. What a piece of crap, I am so sorry you are going through this. This is obviously someone who knows you.

Cruella, you are right...let this make your marriage stronger. Maybe you will be able to talk to your DH about what you've been going through and he will better understand you and what your needs are.

Stay strong!

Love

Jojo - whatever you do, do not let this mofo get the best of you - that's exactly what they're looking for.

Be strong, and hold your head up high. You did nothing wrong. You came here for help, release, and advice.

And Brandon - just a reminder - Karma IS indeed a bitch.

and I think you should go to the facebook administrators. Show them all of your proof. They should be able to help you and do something about this a**hole.

What's really sad, IMHO, is that he brought an innocent child into this by using SD8's name.

I think you should do a little homework on this psycho. He might be someone who knew BM or knows her family or friends. Bring this to counseling, and DO NOT LET THIS GUY WIN!

That Brandon Riley is BM?

I'm so sorry this happened. I hate to think anyone on ST would do such a think. I think of this website as my sanctuary and to hear it has been violated greatly upsets me. This outlet is to valuable to those in a SP role. My BF doesn't know I post here and I will never tell him. I need some place where I can be honest with myself and the word. I have to present my "game-face" in the SP role most of the time in order to keep my sanity.

Given the stress you've been under with SD lately, I don't imagine that this facebook incident helped anything. I hope you don't leave ST, but I will totally understand if you feel the need to keep things more private.

this has happened to you. I agree with the others though, that this can be used to possibly strengthen your relationship.

When your DH is calm, you MAY want to do the following...

1. Acknowledge that what you wrote may "sound" mean and harsh to him, but you were venting what you were feeling at the time WHILE ALSO REACHING OUT TO OTHERS IN SIMILAR SITUATIONS FOR RESOLUTION. The reason you are on this site - to make things BETTER.

2. Let him know that you have been feeling lonely and confused and that the people on this site have helped you sift through your feelings. You were doing this before counseling because you knew you needed help.

3. Possibly give him an example of where this site has helped you, and let him know that hearing it come from a stranger, an impartial stranger, really does help - just like counseling does.

4. Let your husband know, that whatever that stupid as*hole Brandon Riley hoped to achieve, he only achieved by giving out PART OF THE INFORMATION. This is very very important. For example, from your post, it sounded like he only picked part of your blogs to cut and paste and not others where you were truly asking for help to get through things, and saying, "Yes, I want this to work"... right?

Please understand that your husband is very HURT right now by what he read. And yes, we all have the right to express our true feelings on here but that doesn't mean that our true feelings wouldn't hurt our significant others if they read them. By acknowledging his hurt, and acknowledging your own need to sort through your feelings, I hope you can help him to understand "why" you needed to say what you said and use this site.

Try to find out who Brandon Riley is. And maybe even ask your husband "Before this drives a wedge between us, why do you think Brandon Riley would try to hurt us? Who do you think this is?"

I hope you don't leave ST... Like Cruella said, you were one of the ones on here that really were seeming like they are using the site for what it is intended for.

Best of luck to you honey....

*** A rainbow just threw up on me... and now I'm sh*tting glitter! ***

I don't see how you could find someone on here unless you knew they posted and went looking. There are soo many blogs. BM family? Does SD know you post?

I'm sorry for you, Jo. Hope you are ok.

"Courage is fear holding on a minute longer." General George S. Patton

to be ashamed about. Rather than having issues overwhelm you and your marriage, you sought help -- the right thing to do. That you sought out help at what you thought was an "anonymous" site and then found it was abused -- not your fault.

Still, the damage is done, I suppose.

I would remind my DH that oftentimes things look more harsh in print than the poster may have intended. I know I've looked back and regretted the way I've phrased something.

Also, you were VENTING. Letting off steam, getting advice -- again, therapeutic. And maybe things were overstated a bit because that's how you felt at the moment, right? I also would stress this. And the things you said on this site seem to me to be topics you've broached with your DH in the past, so it shouldn't come as a shock.

My DH knows I post here and doesn't have a problem with it. He sometimes thinks the posters are a little nasty (not you), but I remind him that they have little to no support at home. I think he gets it. Maybe yours will too (in a few months or so).

Is it possible that there is not Brandon Riley? DH could have been doing a little "spying" and found out about your visiting this site. He may have made up Brandon Riley to cover up how he found out about your blogs. That someone should just happen to come across your FB page and link it to your blogs here just seems like a really bizarre conincidence. I am soooo sorry this happened to you. This is a lot of our worst fear, that DH or BM will come across our private thoughts there and will take venting out of context. Venting is therapeutic, and when taken out of context is no different from invading someone's private thoughts, or the things they would only reveal to their therapist. It's not fair to take what someone says here and use it against them, when it was never meant to be read by the person invading our privacy in the first place.

I think the BM is most likely to be the culprit here.

But Storiesbysteve is right, we all come here to get advice and vent. That is what this website is all about. It keeps us sane and helps us deal with what must be one of the most difficult jobs there is. You were doing your best to hold things together. We have all been there.

and read some of my pm's to a member with very personal things about dh. He at first was shaking he was so upset, but when i explained that the things that upset him were not posted for everyone to see he calmed down. I posted a blog to find out how to delete my account so he couldnt continue reading all my posts, but i couldnt figure it out and was too busy at work to delete one by one. The out pouring of support from members on my deleting blog shocked my dh and he saw how supportive every one was and that this site was very helpful to me and provided great advice!

as one member said to me, dh was hurt by the honesty that he read, he was not prepared to be faced with things that his actions created, or that i was hurt because of things he was doing. after reading all my blogs, dh called me and said to come on here as much as i want, its healthy to vent, and only asked that i not discuss personal details about him...

maybe this is a chance for dh to see in another channel your feelings and emotions, and possibly good will come from the all out honesty. it did for dh and i!

With all the things you have been having to deal with in regard to your SDs "sleep issues" and her recent trip to the hospital for her mysterious "stomach problems."

Then, the added issues of you and DH not seeing eye-to-eye on said issues.

And to top it all off, now there's some PSYCHO stalking you online and causing even more trouble for you and your DH?

This is beyond awful! I agree with the other posters who said that you need to have a heart-to-heart with your DH and explain to him the WHOLE story- YOUR story. Show him all of ST, all of your posts. And all of OUR responses.

Give him all the information and shine a big, bright light on it! Let him know that you came here looking for support and advice. Becasue you love and care for him AND his child and want to do everything you can to help YOUR FAMILY.

And to this EVIL stalker- I hope you get back what is coming to you tenfold. Karma is a bitch!

"Of course things worked out nicely for Carol Brady...she had a live-in maid and Mike's first wife was DEAD!"

believe this happened to you and I'm so sorry some asshole would do that! HUGS girl and just try to keep your head up! Dont let him win!

I cannot believe how far some of them will go, because you know it had to be BM or someone in her family, to do this to you.

It's sick.

BM has found me here before to........little did she know my DH is a member here to and we know everything that each other writes.

I'm sorry you are going through this, who ever this person is I hope they get outed and your DH kickes their ass.

Jojo, I am so sorry to hear this. You were finally getting to the bottom of things!

Counseling, finding SD8 issue with her Mom being gone... the doctors with the reflux.

This is so sad... not only was it mean, it was also bad timing. Just like if they wanted to stir things back up again with you and DH.

So sorry hun.... My prayers are with you.

Immature love says: 'I love you because I need you.' Mature love says 'I need you because I love you.'
Erich Fromm

Jo,

Sorry you are having to deal with this. Some people are just assholes and you can't fix stupid so focus on your marriage and don't sweat the efforts of the idiots.

Good luck and bet regards,

Success is rarely final. Failure is rarely fatal. It is character, courage and consistency of effort that count. Vince Lombardi (with some minor Rags modifications) To each according to their performance, screw Karl Marx. (Rags)