GET THIS!!!!!!!!!
Can anyone answer why a parent would sell out their own blood?
I mean come on really your own son?
Here is my issue. I am with a man who has a 7 month old son. We have been together prior to his birth. Things with the BM has mellowed out for the most part. Every once in a while the two of them will have a heated discussion regarding the care of their child. This past weekend BM asked if she could have him for the holidays. We have gotten him every weekend since he was 2 weeks old. BF was fine with this and told her no problem. We go to his aunt/ uncles for Easter. While we are there we are inform how his own mother scammed him behind his back. She convinced BM to tell BF that she wanted the baby, so she could have him for the holiday. BF was so pissed off.... he called her and told her that a grand parent is a privlidge not a right (advise from Anne 8102)
She told him if she had to get a lawyer that she will have her grand baby 1 weekend every month. Can you believe this lady. I don't f*#@ing guess.
We cannot believe that his own mother went behind him like this. So where do we go from here? We are at a lost. We have no idea of what she has been telling BM about us. Is she playing BM againist us?
How do you trust anyone after this? Has anyone else experienced this? All advise is greatly appreciated.
Kim
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seriously?!?!?!
screw her!seriously. my mother would get cut out of my luife for some bakhanded shit like that. you are 100% right! being a grandmother is a privilige. it is not her right. and if she is dumb enough to spend money on a lawyer? her bad. they are not going to force visitation with the grandmother. it just isnt going to happen. seriousloy, screw her. i dont understand how you can do that to your child, over THEIR child. dont be frightened by her threat sweetie.
i take care of yours; respect me!
What was the relationship like between them before?
Has the grandmother ever interfered like this before? What would prompt her to do something deceitful like this? Do you have the whole story? Is BM encouraging this...it doesn't make sense!
Personally, I have been eternally greatful for the my parents in my children's lives, during life's joys and struggles and can't imagine them not in our lives. But they would never go behind my back to interfere with my parenthood. That is probably the issue the needs to be addressed the most. And getting lawyers involved...not what the child needs at all...what is up with that?
Actually there has been case law...
where grandparents went to court for visitation with grandchildren. It is possible but is it necessary?!
that is irritating...i know
that is irritating...i know how you must feel. i sometimes feel that my mother in law favors bm over me. she says she doesn't talk to her but i know she does cause i've heard bm visits her from time to time. what am i suppose to feel about that when mil tells me she doesn't talk to her but behind my back they are friends. and mil alwasys asks about ss and not about my own daughter. i'm so sick of hearing it. i think it's really up to your BF to have a talk w/his mother of what she is doing and how you guys feel about it. i would stay away from mother in law if i were you, like you said you don't know what she has been telling bm. it's just sad that it has to end up this way. who can you trust right?
-happy mom
Wow
my husband has BF & SM and BM & SF; so we are trully a blended family. His BF and SM are very friendly with his ex-wife; while his BM & SF are polite but do not carry on a relationship with her. We find a balance that is not always easy, but he makes it very clear that I am his wife and he will not tolerate any crap from anyone. My husband has gone as far as cutting off contact with his BF & SM for going behind his back with the ex-wife to see his kids. So they are coming around to his way of thinking. Keep in there but don't ignore the situation, need to let her know that if she wants to see her grandchild then she needs to communicate with her son.
That's
effed up. Sorry. That's WRONG.
CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE
I want BF to stand up to her. We have had several converstaions about this. His response is "she's a BITCH." Which may be true but doesn't solve the issue. If I say something it will be held againist me for life. I am the outsider. All blame is placed on me. I was told I am the reason she doesn't spend "quality time" with her grand baby. I don't ever recall telling anyone in his family that they were not welcome in our home. They can come over anytime to see him. We live about 30 miles from his mother and she feels it is too far to drve. Which is funny cause she had no problem driving to BM house to pick her up anytime she calls. It is not my responsibility to tote the baby around for all to see. Frankly I don't give a shit if anyone else spends the "quality time" she is refering to, but him. It is his SON, his WEEKENDS, and we will do as we see fit. End of story. If this isn't good enough the tough shit!!
His mother was the same way with her previous grandchildren has been the same. She told her own daughter when she was ready to move out on her own that if she had to she would call CPS on her to get her babies back. She needs to back off. It has really gotten out of control. The six year olds calls her grandmother mama. The relationship between the real mom and daughter is slowly building. I refuse to have her all in our business. I don't want her to be out of our lives, but she has to understand there are boundries that are not to be crossed. Playing both sides of the fence will result in her being left out!!
Someone gave you really bad advice.
Actually its not ONLY a privledge to be a grandparent but it is ALSO her right. She can get visitation and unless she is beating the sin out of the kid, the courts will give it to her.
Her Rights!!!!
I wish the grand mother all the luck in the world, I don't feel she has a chance in hell. BD said he will be the first to testify against her, he said the things that went on in his childhood will constitute it. You don't leave four kids behind with the father to live with another man and raise his three kids. If you are deemed a bad mom how can you become a great grandparent?
The funny thing is.... he never planned on keeping his mother out of the picture. He actuallty enjoyed the fact that his mother was involved, until she decided to go behind his back and starting problems between him and BM. So the decisions she has made will affect the relationship between not only her blood son but her grandchild as well. So let her waste her money in the court system because she has nobody to blame but herself.