Oh sweetie... What's wrong with you is that you've been emotionally abused by this man.

His world is all about him - his wants, his needs, his daughter, him him Him. He's having a fit because if you aren't living with him, if you get some distance and training and support from outside you might begin to see that you deserve better than the paltry amount he's willing to give you. He does not want you to be independent.

On top of which, if you move away then, god forbid, he might actually have to exert himself to still see you. That doesn't seem like it would suit him. After all, you should just Be there for him whenever he wants since his desires are paramount in his world.

You going to school is not going to make the courts increase the CS you receive. He's dreaming. And I imagine that if you give in to go to school where you live, something's going to come up and he's just not going to be able to pay for it, so too bad for you. If he Did actually pay for it, he'd whip you with being beholden to him forever more.

He wants things done his way so he can retain the control over you. You need to move to the house your mom is offering and seek some help from the domestic violence services in your area. There are free phone lines if nothing else.

You are not the bad guy. You are the one trying to find a compromise to help the whole family. He's the one making ultimatums and pitching temper tantrums because he wants his way all the time.

You will be so much better off out of this situation.

He is holding you back and being selfish. If you are unhappy and have been unhappy for awhile, your son sees it. DH isnt teaching your son how to be a man. Show your son what it means to be a strong, independant woman. Not how to not treat your partner.

^^^What Dog person said.

Nothing is wrong with you. He's an abusive, control freak that doesn't want you to better your life that way he can continue telling you what to do.

If I were you, I'd be soooooo out of there.

To be honest, it sounds you just want to move away and you are using college as the "reason" to do it or get some separation. He's right, you could go to college anywhere and the fact you want to go AWAY just means you are not happy as you've clearly stated. If you are in an abusive relationship, you just need to leave...PERIOD.

Mental/verbal abuse can be just as scarring as physical.

I went back and read some of your prior posts. This guy is an ass. Of COURSE he doesn't want you to move out and go to college! First off, who would clean and cook for him?? Second, that is way too much chance that you are going to meet someone and become friends and find out that the way he treats you and your child is NOT RIGHT.

A few posts ago, you mentioned moving when your son was done with school. It seems like the Universe is coming together to make you leaving him completely possible.

Why would anyone rain on their spouse's ambitions like that? Especially when it will benefit BOTH of you! I've been trying to get my DH to go to college for YEARS!

You know what you need to do. This sounds like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

You are right he is wrong.

Ps not you ex's responsibility to pay more CS so you can go to school

He's quite the bully isn't he?

Go for it, do what is right for you.

I am happy you are not abandoning yourself and taking care of you and your son. I did abandon myself and realized it when I already lost a lot . Do not allow him to confuse you , bully you , put guilt and shame on you. Take good care of you and your son! Stay true to yourself and your healthy and sound judgement.

I don't think it's fair to take a break from your marriage and live somewhere else for a year. I think you just need to end it and move on. I couldn't imagine not sleeping with my husband every night. That's something I'd never give up even for money. He's had the chance to take a traveling job and we just couldn't be apart that long.

He is an ass and is just spouting contradictory nonsense. He is also jealous and insecure because you want to improve your life and where does that leave him?

First, he told you that you need to stay and get a job to pick up his slack. Now, he tells you that you can go to school where you live and he will pay what needs to be paid (and how's he going to do that?). But he also told you that going to school would be a waste of time.

You offered for him to stay at your mom's with you but he doesn't want to do that so he tells you you are walking out on the relationship.

I would let him watch me walk.

The only thing wrong with you is that you are with the wrong man. You deserve someone who will encourage your and support you.

I went back to school at 30 for grad school at one of the toughest universities in the nation. I did fine.

I think your DH is right. Moving out for a year is bailing on the marriage. If you really want out you should just file for divorce.

Your DH is a bully and sounds very scared of you having options.

Going back to school when you're older is actually easier in most classes. The older student is more focused and has experience to back up classroom instruction.

I went back to school and the hardest thing I found was retraining DH to respect the time I needed to do homework. He works from home and was constantly interrupting me to talk over some issue or to show me his latest find on Ebay.

I finished my MFA when I was 40.

Learn to say no. Be on the lookout for your H to have all kinds of little emergencies that 'only you can handle.' It saps the resolve and your time. The first times you refuse to be at his beck and call expect massive pouting, accusations, fit throwing that puts a 2 year old to shame. It will put your stomache in knots and totally mess with your ability to focus. Persevere, it's worth it. If you are not living at home, remember you don't have to answwer the phone every time he calls.