You are allowed to hate it. But, as of right now block your ex, his new GF, and anyone connected on FB. The self torture stops right now. Time will help you clearly see how much of a loser, snake, POS your ex is. Yea for now SS thinks the new GF is great, that wont last. Trust me your SS will do to her what he did to your marriage. DH will always be a snake and a new flavor will replace her. Sick, insecure, cheating men do that.

Get counselling, rely on friends, and be grateful your children are not witnessing their mom being treated like crap. They will see you as a strong proud woman. Dig deep inside and you will find her.

Hugs

His rebound relationship is probably just that. Its all peaches and cream and then over. You take time to heal. Focus on yourself and who you want to be at this point in your life FOR YOU.

Your day will come honey just hang in there.

Meh. I kind of feel sorry for the new GF.

She's obviously rebound girl, and she's allowed herself to become enmeshed with a man who isn't divorced yet...who probably fed her a whole bunch of bull about how mean and strict and unloving you were toward SS to make her feel sorry for him and all he had to put up with. Oh, you poor, poor man! She's allowed herself to get embroiled in that clusterbeep that is your DH's dad and his strange demands and BM. I'm assuming she's never been in a step-situation before, that she has no children of her own...and she's making all the classic mistakes. She swallowed what your DH was shilling and now she's working triple-time to reassure him that she's not like YOU. She's not a mean, strict, unloving person who hates kids! She'll bend over backwards to do whatever SS wants, right when he wants it!

Boy is she in for a rude awakening when she DOES find herself at cross-purposes (and I assure you, she will, sooner rather than later). I almost think your DH is subconsciously trying to manipulate a certain kind of behavior from her...I mean, it's not going to be easy for her to back-peddle and try to set some boundaries after going out of her way to prove how much of an 'adult' she is and how much she's able to handle all the in-law, BM, SS nonsense. She could lose years of her life to this charade.

Just wait til step daddy starts calling the shots in her happy love nest with your ex, lol.

Grats on your strength and freedom. Make him buy you out of the house and you'll have activity money for the girls. Is there a way to work out alternatives to pay, like working at their gyms on the side to pay for lessons?

Goblin
I remember reading all of your blogs. This man was never happy- there was always something
He couldn’t stick to his word he couldn’t stand up to his family he couldn’t keep to the house rules
When the house rules changed and you started doing stuff with your kids
He didn’t like crock pot meals
He didn’t like the fast meals you made
He didn’t like that you were gone
He wouldn’t change days of as activities for you to have more time
He wouldn’t cut ss to one activity but expected you to cut girls down

Let’s face it - he wanted to stay in with daddy megabucks. You were a conviently blameable target
Now he can do what he likes with daddy megabucks welcoming him back into the fold
He never made a single effort to meet you half way and help save your marriage
Block him stop torturing yourself and start a new life

I also agree with others here - that poor new girl is making so many of the classic newbie mistakes
And it will not last cause eventually she will see his balls aren’t his own and that is totally not sexy
Further to that poor girl will be gaslit the second she tries to complain about it

It may not feel like it now but you have had a lucky escape

Hooray for you! You got out of his unhappy clutches!

I know things seem super hard. As the pain subsides and you start feeling yourself again, you will realize how much happier you are.

Take some time to talk to someone. Nothing wrong with a bit of a mental tune up when going through something like a divorce that is difficult for anybody not in denial.

The fact you are showing your girls how to stand up for themselves by example is one of the best gifts you can give them.

Get off Fakebook, find a new hobby or two for the evenings and keep on keeping on.

Feel proud of yourself for being a smarter, stronger woman than even you knew!

Hugs!

He's not your person.

I'll be blunt - why in the WORLD are you lamenting losing all that bull crap you put up with?

BLUNT TRUTH: He's not worth all this upset. He bitched about EVERYTHING. Lord, the man needed to SHUT UP.

Hey, you just described a miserable existence with him. You were not happy so why be concerned with the new girlfriend. View her as the next "victim". LOL - trust me on this. These losers don't change. They just start the same mess with someone else all over again. I'm sure he's told her how HORRID you were. WHO CARES???? LOL

He's not worth any of this. Knock the dirt of your shoes, dust yourself off, get that divorce, and don't give a single crap about what he's doing.

As I said in my other comment, you can figure out the common denominator in why MOST of these guys are divorced and not every ex wife is crazy or mean. Are you? Or do you feel that things went south because you had to react to what HE was doing? Keep that in mind. And remember it.

This is the same douchecanoe that complained about OP making crockpot meals due to the kids activities. That would have been enough for me, without all the other problems. Good riddance. Suck it up, rub some dirt in it, and move on. You've got this OP. Just keep stepping. It will get better.

Oh if only you had purchased that boy scout shirt }:) . I think you had bigger issues than you were willing to see for a very long time, so let go and let god, you are now free to live your life without caterig to that controlling family.

Congrats!
Start building a new life and make a better choice next time!
I have a feeling we might see the new GF on here soon enough.