I would like to start by saying I care for my skids. They are not all that bad but it is a growing and learning process for all involved (that story will change the next time I get mad and they become demon spawns again). My biggest fear is ending up with full custody. There are three of them and I hope my fears are unfounded and I hope someone can tell me that the bm hasn't done anything too bad to lose custody (she probably hasn't but I need my mind at ease). I get from dh that he'd love to get custody of the skids and from MIL thinking I'm such a great mom and I should be full time mother to all her grand-kids (this literally gives me anxiety every time she brings it up). I love that our full time family is just dh, our son, and me, and his kids every other weekend is fine.

BM is crazy, I'll give dh that. There has been a number of incidents that have taken place at BM's house and it upsets dh. Some of the incidents have been sd5 getting into her mother's alcohol, ss11 molesting and taking pictures of his stepbrother at bm's house, and the constant fighting. BM and her new husband fight a lot and have even got into a physical altercation in front of the skids (her husband grabbed and twisted her arm and hurt her). The kids are pretty quiet about what goes on over there and only reveal stuff once they have been out of the situation for an extended time (my niece used to do this but she was being molested by her father and I hope I'm making connections where there are none). When they were with us for spring break sd5 started cussing and dh got upset and demanded to know where she has heard it from. SS11 revealed (very hesitantly) that bm and her dh fight all the time after they go to bed. The next day sd9 went into detail about their fighting and turns out it happens every night. SD9 was so scared that she asked me if anything happens to her mom would she live with us (is this normal?). Also sd9 says she doesn't like her stepfather but I feel like she is telling me half stories and when she gets to a certain part in the story she will not finish and it makes no sense at all. I'm am afraid that this summer she will finish those stories and it might be something way worse than I can imagine (of course if they are in any danger I will protect them). Currently bm is being stupid and threatening restricting access of the skids. I read that this is cause for a change in custody. I know that if bm feels she is getting away with it that she will start doing this all the time and I'm afraid that this might lead to a change in custody. So my question is is there cause for concern? Am I letting my past experience cloud my judgement? Also if she does go through with restricting access would the courts just give her a slap on the hand? I think that the environment over there is not in their best interest because of all the fighting, but idk what the courts would think. We have decided to just wait it out and collect evidence in case we ever need it. We are documenting what and when the kids say certain things and we are saving text messages in case we ever need them.