Non-parents really don't know..
As many of you know, I am not a BM. That being said, I think I can manage children pretty well and I know that they can have expectations. DH has never pulled the "you're not a parent card" on me, thankfully.
SD is a picky eater. She hates trying new things. DH got home late last night and we decided to go out. We chose a Chinese buffet. It was ok. When we got there, SD was whining that she had sweet and sour chicken last week (with BM) and do they have sushi? All she eats as sushi is California rolls, by the way. I ignored her whining.
So she gets a large plate of breaded chicken, sweet and sour sauce, and white rice. She ate most of her chicken and didn't get dessert because she ate so slowly. To my knowledge, she had only eaten a bowl of cereal 7 hours before that and a few sips of water. SD always has an upset stomach because of the processed junk she eats, never exercises, and doesn't stay hydrated.
I didn't sleep very well last night and about 2am I hear her rummaging around in the kitchen. She got a bowl to throw up in. She was still heaving about 20 minutes later so I went to check on her. She had taken the office chair to her desk into the small bathroom and had her phone. I found that pretty comical. Anyway, she still had children's tylenol from when she was "sick" 2 weeks ago and got to skip church. I tell her to drink cold water and/ or lemonade and take a dose. She hadn't thought of that.
As I'm going back to bed, she says she's texting her friend that she can't go to her house for the sleepover they planned this evening. "Why?" I ask. "You think you'll be so sick in 15 hours that you can't go?". She looks at me puzzled like she hadn't thought of that either. Look, folks, I've had hangovers from Hell and still managed to be functional, but then again, I'm a grown woman.
So here is my question: what would a real mom say? I do think she needs to rest and hydrate, but she also needs to eat better food and be active. Also, I'd like her to try to go because she's done literally nothing this week except go to a 1 hour therapy appointment and sit around watching Netflix, YouTube, and Pinterest. Maybe just let her do what she wants and do what a real sick child should do and miss out on a sleepover? Her friends are very busy so it's rare that she has sleepovers. Maybe it was the most polite thing to do- inform her friend that she was sick before their plans came more to a crunch time?
- I love dogs's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
Here's my perspective: I am
Here's my perspective: I am cautious about being contagious. If my DD was vomiting in the middle of the night, I would have her cancel the sleepover. She would already know that and would cancel herself. Maybe that's what SD was thinking?
Vomiting means no activities
Vomiting means no activities with other people for at least 24 hours. Of course the sleepover is canceled.
Most kids and teens have iron stomachs. If stomach problems are a frequent issue, then regardless of diet, she needs to see a doctor.
Why was she vomiting? Did
Why was she vomiting? Did she have a fever? Had she been sick recently??
SD admitted a year or two ago
SD admitted a year or two ago that she knows faking sick will get BM to pick her up from school but she was sick last night. Either from a) the food b) not eating anything for hours before dinner or c) she has a sensitive stomach. BM holds the insurance and DH has told her that if SD is sick so often, she needs to see a doctor but BM refuses.
No fever. She says she's fine today and is asking her friend if she can still go over in 6 or so hours. Should I just let DH handle it? He won't be home before I was going to take her and he did say she needs rest and if she misses out, oh well. Neither of us got sick.
I think she should stay home.
I think she should stay home...
Beyond that, I agree with Pear. If she really is sick that frequently or has a sensitive stomach she does need to see a doctor. I would push the issue with BM.
Honestly, what's the deal? Seems like either child is brought to Dr too much for no reason or not at all!
I think that your SD may have
I think that your SD may have a slight case of food poisoning from the Chinese buffet. Some cases are mild and are over in just a few hours. If she did not have a fever and she feels back to normal in a day I doubt she has a virus. Even though some viruses last 24 hrs you have a fever with them.
It could also be a reaction
It could also be a reaction to certain spices used in Chinese cooking. I have ulcerative colitis, and know there's a cost to choosing to eat Chinese or Mongolian food.
Foodborne illness typically doesn't manifest for at least twelve hours, but if your SD has a "sensitive stomach", she needs to see a gastroenterologist. Maybe if BM and BD take their kid to the appointment together and everybody hears straight from the doctor the need for exercise, hydration, healthy foods, etc changes will be made. None of this is normal for a tween.
Since you advised her to take
Since you advised her to take Tylenol, I assume she had a fever. If I were the mother of the child having the sleep over I would prefer that a child who had been vomiting and fereverish the night before not come to my house.
I would have leaned towards
I would have leaned towards this vomiting to be food-related, so no Tylenol. Did she just help herself to it? In the future, I’d inform her that she needs to check with you or her dad before taking any medication. I would also tell her that you don’t care how medication is done at BM’s house - because this is your house.
In your shoes, I would have put her on watch and advised her to rest and hydrate with lots of water and ice chips. She’d most likely NOT attend the sleepover, because one can go hours between vomiting and who wants to get a call at midnight or later to come and pick her up because she’s (still) ill? Because that person to pick her up would most likely be you, right?
On the flipside, it’s just common sense and courtesy to not send a potentially sick person into someone’s home.