9 weeks now and restless
Since finding out I've been pregnant- I'm at 9 weeks. Major whirlwinds of nausea day and night. Wishing for the slightest relief. I've been at the doctors office weekly to keep in check since going to the hospital. I've lost weight since I can't keep food down. This past week I've been really pushing it to stay down so I've put back on 2 lbs. I try to keep myself calm and little stress as possible which at times gets hard. I'm frustrated at having married a man who has experienced childbirth twice now because we don't share that same excitement and enthusiasm, concern even. Why am I the only one looking at baby items? Why don't you want to go to every doctor visit with me? Why am I only looking at baby names? Is it because you've already done this before???
He has taken a seat back and being more gentle and helpful but I'm still not happy. I wonder if I ever will be.
I've decided I'm picking out the names. The day he stops drinking for 9 months, doesn't eat sushi/fishes, grows exhausted by 7pm and whatnot, then he can have a say. As said before, I don't see much excitement from him anyway.
I can see it already. Me having to foot the bill for baby clothes, bed, stroller, high chair... with having miniscule work. Dumbass.
Then there's a nagging thought... how are we eventually going to tell the girls. With my new place in the family, SD6 had her own bouts of hissy fits and disobedience. She got sassy and outright rude at times. The last thing I want to deal with, in combination of worrying about finances, DH's dumbass car, how we're eventually moving, looking for a job... is his girls possibly becoming insecure about a new baby coming in. I don't want to deal with hissy fits again. I have 0 to no tolerance- my guess due to hormones and because I feel sick all the time. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOo here's what I suggested, DH tell them on the car ride to drop the off at their moms so they have time to maul it over in their little heads and I don't have to deal with it. Was that selfish bastard happy with that suggestion??? NOoooooooooooooo... he doesn't want them to tell their mom. Big fucking deal!!! She's gonna find out anyway! And what's it to him? All they do is bicker.
On top of it, I don't want them rubbing my tummy.
Bitchy. Probably. Do I care? No. It's MY body. MY space. MY baby.
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No reason to tell them
No reason to tell them yet-just wait until you can't hide it physically anymore and they'll figure it out-I wouldn't risk telling them anything before 12-16 weeks honestly-just will cause you more stress which isn't good for you or baby.
Sorry you are feeling he's not sharing this joy with you-that has to suck!
He won't let me announce it
He won't let me announce it to friends on FB though... he wants them to know first.
It really pisses me off because sometimes he puts them on the same level as adults and they aren't. They are children. They don't get the same priviledges as adults. They don't get to listen in on adult conversations. UGH...
Tell him when HE's the one
Tell him when HE's the one carrying a child ten months and all the discomforts he can chose when to tell whom.....oh and to suck it! lol
Lol overit, if he'd sucked it
Lol overit, if he'd sucked it they wouldn't be in this situation!
First off, congratulations!
First off, congratulations! How very exciting to be having your first baby. This is an amazing time in your life and I sincerely hope you are able to enjoy it. I don't know you or your husband, but it sounds like you are very angry with him and at his relationship with his children. I know how frustrating it can be to share your husband and how quickly sadness can wash over you when you realize you are having a "first" on your own. Sometimes this happens to me when I least expect it and very rapidly I feel resentment building. Instead of looking so negatively at the situation, try to focus on some of the good things about your husband. What DOES he do to make you feel good? And what was it about him that made you fall in love? If you can try and channel some of this positivity things will improve. Also think about what made him fall in love with you
I'm sure some of this has to do with how nurturing you were with his children and that he thought you would make an excellent mother. I think something we women do when we are feeling scared, sad, or hurt is express our frustrations through anger. Sometimes this makes our husbands feel like they can't do anything right and they stop trying. So instead of being angry and closing yourself off, show him what you are made of! Make an effort to participate in activities with him and his kids and show him your nurturing side...I think this will get him a lot more excited about the baby because he won't be able to wait to see you shine as a new mom! Also remember that pretty soon your husband will be sharing YOU in a new way and there is a part of him that is scared about that. Things didn't work out between him and his ex and I imagine there is part of him that worries things will fall apart too. So remind him that you love him no matter what and show him how strong you are. And if you still feel mad, get mad! But being supportive/present even when you don't feel like it is what being a family is all about and you will feel better about yourself as a person if you do. Whether this is his first baby or not, this is your first baby together! Congratulations again!
UG... ur SD is a bitch. I
UG... ur SD is a bitch. I don't blame you. I wonder if she will leave for college... crossed fingers for that.