My boys sometimes dont understand this whole blended family thing. A few weeks ago my 5 year old bio. son asked me Who his brother SS15 and sister SD15 really belonged to. I told him all of us, both moms and dads at both thier houses. That answer was not good enough. He asked "No who are their real parents?" I told him BM's name and Your Daddy is thier daddy. This is where he got really confused for awhile. And where I was LMAO...he said " No I mean who were their real parent before that?" I suppose we really confuse the kid because we ar also Foster Parents, and he understands that. He thought his brother and sister were foster kids because they did not come from my belly! He gets that kids come live with us for ahwile while thier parents can't take care of them or while they are finding new parents to live with. So my BIO son thought his half brother and sister were foster kids. LMAO because somedays I wish that were true. But he continued with the questioning. He asked, "well when do SS15 and SD15 get their new home and new mom and dad because I dont want them to live here anymore they are mean". That is when I wished DH heard this conversation because when I tell him our biokids are not happy because of the way SS15 and SD15 treat them when they are here he says I put that shit in thier head or am making it up...No this little boy was really upset with SS15 and was looking for an out, looking for relief that one day they will live in a new home...So then he asked "who's belly did they come from, not your rigth mom?" I said no not mine, I said BM's name. He said well how did God put them in her belly if they live here with daddy too and dadyy does not love her and is nto married to her. I said well he was marrie dto her before us. He's still to young to understand daddy had a marriage before this one. Well he seemed to understadn a little more at this time...until the other night he asked " Mom when will I get my other house with my other parents? " I said you won't have to live with any one else bud, you will always be ours and mommy and daddy will stay married so you wont have to get a new mommy or a new daddy. He said "Oh Good." but then said "If you die then I have to have a new mommy" I told him i was not dying any time soon and not to worry about that. I would really like to know who made my child start to worry about his life after me when he is 5 years old. But hopefully its just because he's in religion classes talking about death and heaven or something like that and not that anyone is making threats about me behind my back (eh-hem SS15).
So I though this questioning was over for while until last week. I was picking SS15 and SD15 up from school and my 2 year old starting freaking out. " No mommy dont pick them up I dont want them to come to our house, you are not thier mommy you are my mommy, dont get them I dont want SS15 and sissy to live here." So hear it goes again with the two year old not wanting them hear and not getting this blened family thing. And for the last two weeks I hear my 2 year old telling his Sissy and SS15 to go back to their moms house all the time. When he does not like how he is being treated he says go to your other house, i dont want to listne to you. Go to you mom's you are mean, etc....
He may have picked this last bit up from overhearing DH and i tell the skids if they do not like sharing with their little brothers or foster kids and do not like the rules we have, or dont like the food we cook, etc...then go back to your mothers house. But the rest about them being mean to him he has said this all on thier own because I keep my opinions and observations to myself or tell DH about my concerns when they are sleeping because I do not want my opinion of my skids affect the way my biokids feel about thier half siblings. I want them to form their own relationships with them with out my two cents. Unless my kids sense my constant being on guard to protect them from SS15 and SD15 because some one has to protect them from thier cruelty. The only other 2 ways he could pick it up from me is if he gets it from when I correct my kids and my kids come back with well "SS15 or SD15 do it" then I say well you are my kids and I do not want you to act that way its not nice, I am your momy and you have to listen to me...or you are 2 and 5 and things that 15 yos do are not ok for you to do. Then the only other possible way is if my 2 yo can read and has read my emails to friends and blogs on this site and I'm pretty sure he's not that smart yet...
So what do I do when my 2 and 5 year old are saying they dont want the SKIDs to live here?