in grief but nobody died...
So..here I am living out the final rented days on this house with a man who I've told I don't want to be with because of his kids..
I feel like poo..in fact-I feel like I'm grieving because living with someone you can't touch or talk to properly because of your own choices is not a good situation..
Last night exBF cleared out "the kids" room..which is now just a sleeping bag and his stuff where he is camping while we wait. I feel immensely sad and I am wondering if I made the right decision or whether I will crack because I love him..and I never wanted to be with anyone 24/7 before.
To be fair tho..reading posts on this site has helped-because it seems like it never gets easier and I am pretty much still a novice. So hopefully he will find a place soon and then we can both move on. I kind of wish we'd had a big row or something which would make it a little easier..instead of this resigned way of accepting the inevitable.
But for now it stinks..and life is unfair and I am feeling a little sorry for myself. ..Does anyone have a positive sm situation or is this the way it always has to be?
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no they didn't so god knows
no they didn't so god knows what a mess I'd have been then! They stayed with us every other week..so in reality I was pretty lucky. I think I just got obsessed with the longterm and the commitment..eg what happened if BM got sick or worse, how will it impact on our lives as a couple financially and otherwise. Wrongly or rightly I do believe that taking on skids shoulf be undertaken with the same painstaking decision as having your own...and after much soul searching I decided I wasn't strong enough. Or committed enough!
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Sorry you're going through
Sorry you're going through this Dragon. I can empathize, as I think I'm getting ready to finally end things as well. I love my BF so much and he loves me, but he can't/doesn't want to make the changes I need to be happy, and I can't be happy without them.
Like you, I have too much hesitation regarding the future and finances to feel good about progressing right now.
I don't think a situation needs to be perfect, but it needs to feel "right" to move forward in good conscience. Better to err on the side of leaving than to marry and regret it -- at least that's how I feel.
I hope you're doing ok...wishing you peace and happiness.