Oh sweety, welcome. I was and am where you are. I hope this site helps you as much as it has me. I look forward to hearing about your adventures and weighing in.

The transitions are pure hell for everyone involved. It really takes a lot of effort and patience for the family to blend and mesh. Everyone has to participate in order for you all to evolve together and cohesively. Even time and effort may not help your situation but I do know one thing, feeling guilt over your emotions is pointless. I can relate. I have felt like I'm a horrible person because I disliked my skids very much. You have to let that go because you are normal, its normal to feel that way and you are not alone. Its simply not true either, your feelings do not define you as a human being. Hang in there, practice patience and communication with your fiancé and the children. Hopefully you and your fiancé can get on the same page.

Go ahead, post the stories. It'll do you good. You'll be surprised to find many have similar stories. Or you'll be awarded a tiara for Worst Skid. Either way, you'll get a laugh and relief and isn't that exactly what you need? So let it out!

:sick: I'm new here too. Thought yahoo chat still offered chat rooms. Looked there recently to see if I could find a chat room on blended family issues to vent in. However, they no longer do public chat rooms. Then, I found this form here that says you can vent about anything in the stepfamily/blended family category.
All I think about, everyday, is why in the heck did I ever break my cardinal rule about dating a divorced guy with kids? One date was all it took and I fell in love and engaged 3 months later and married one year later. That was then... now, all I think about, more like fantasize about, is imagining my husband has his own spaceship. I have my own too and he needs my help, in space. We are not married in space but our divorced, being captains of our own spaceships. Anyway, I feel great satisfaction, in my little fantasy that he needs my help. I then order my crew to blow his ship up and feel very peaceful that he has been blown up. I feel very free then and relieved of him and the chaos, unhappiness and frustration that has come with marrying him. It was not worth walking down the aisle for this. My advice to anyone single out there... DO NOT HOOK UP WITH SOMEONE ELSE WHO HAS OTHER KIDS. It is much better to marry someone else, no kids, and you both just have your own family of kids together. Blended families, half siblings, adopted kids will all be more of a source of unhappiness and stress. Real happiness is not taking care of other people's kids unless those other kids real parents are dead.
My husband and I had a child together, one year after we met. I focus on my own child as much as possible. My husband had another son from first marriage who is 10 and also adopted his stepdaughter from that first marriage. Before anyone thinks how great this makes him, know that this adoption would've only worked had husband never married again. Presently, she wants to live with her bio mom, wants a relationship with her real dad and husband just wants her to turn age 18 as soon as possible. He admits it was a mistake to adopt her now and it has been atleast 7 years that she has been adopted. The only person she is related to is her half brother, in our home, and it's awkward.
Stepson has stolen from me more than once, doesn't like my cooking, has acted ridiculous when my bio son would cry nonstop. I don't want my son close to the stepson at all and never leave my son alone with stepson, ever or his half sister. I have always supported both kids relationship with their mom, never speak a bad word about her in our home. I had both of her kids in my wedding, which was a huge mistake. That is a regret that I will have for the rest of my life. My husband used to have them buy me gifts for my bday and Christmas but it just felt awkward. I now tell him no more gifts from them on holidays and everyone feels better now. This Christmas, husband will have his gift exchange time with other kids, without me and my son. When they are done, me and my son will do our gift exchange without them. Everyday in this blended family has more components of unhappiness, concealing deceit in some fashion, making sure my computer is locked and passwords to things are hidden. Both kids are secretive and volunteer nothing of their time at their mother's. It's not a happy home and everyday, I wonder why was my husband the only man I had such strong feelings for to marry and have a child with? I suppose only God knows... these days, I hope for the rapture to happen as soon as possible and that my son and I are taken away. If that can't happen, I fantasize my little spaceship fantasy for comfort. We'll see if venting here helps. I hope. I'm really not sugarcoating anything and don't care to be criticized for what I have said here. In fact, I'm not sure anyone can say anything to help me feel better. All I want is my own family with the man I married and I will never have that.