Car issues
Forums:
so BM and DH decided Months ago that SD was not getting a car on her 17th bday. it is not Necessary. she lives 1/2 block from school and works only on Saturday morning for a few hours.
now SD turned 17 and BM decided that she wants her to have a car.
now BM is asking how much we can give her for a car and insurance. im looking at my husband like he is NUTS.... we pay WAY too much in child support already. i told him to tell her "NOT A F'ing DIME!"
are we wrong?
One more yr of CS. Then 4 of
One more yr of CS. Then 4 of college....,
COLLEGE! No way! Make her
COLLEGE! No way! Make her get a student loan if she wants to go to college. 18 is technically an adult. There is no law that says parents have to pay for college. My parents didn't pay for me to go to college and my DH STILL HAS STUDENT LOANS AT 40 YEARS OLD!!!!!
I made it very very very clear to my DH before we ever got married that I would help and support his kids until they got to be 18 but that was it! I laid down the law of not paying for college a long time ago.
He has 4 kids for crying out loud! We would never get to retire if we took that kind of debt on. I say don't agree to pay for college.
BUT! If you lose that fight, here is the most logical and FAIR way of handling it.
1/3 is paid by BM, 1/3 is paid by you and dad, and 1/3 is paid by the kid whether by student loans or working while going to school...
Ask your DH is he is going to
Ask your DH is he is going to listen to you (not one dime) or BM (send me thousands of dollars)? Simple.
I should mention the kid
I should mention the kid doesn't really want a car. She could care less. We were talking a while ago about when the time comes ( 2nd yr of college or third). Maybe we will give her dads car. Her teenage reply was.... But it's ugly. I'm not driving that. I told her shel will ende up walking then. Cuz if she isn't shelling out the money she should have no say
She almost dropped dead when I told her my first car was over 13 yrs old and cost 500 bucks. And I commuted to college in it for 3 years.
My daughter's (first) car is
My daughter's (first) car is a '97 Cherokee. I cover her insurance, she covers gas and regular maintenance, we split major repairs. In three years, she has gotten one parking ticket. She babies that car.
In my opinion, a car is more
In my opinion, a car is more appreciated if they have to pay for it themselves.
My dad made a deal with me that he would match what I saved for my first car. It motivated me to save as much money as I could and to take care of the car once I got it. Insurance, gas, and maintenance was all on me.
It's called growing up and learning responsibility.
Oh my, we are going thru the
Oh my, we are going thru the same thing now. Crazo promised SS16 a car if he kept his grades up and stayed off drugs.
Really you wack job, shouldn't you expect this behavior anyway???
She is so stupid, she just found out how much it is going to cost her to put him on her insurance...snicker snicker, I already knew it was going to sky rocket because I remember it was high when I added my BD years ago, and it was very expensive then. She wants DH to give her more money and wants to know how much he is willing to give toward a car for him.
We already had this discussion pre marriage and, the answer is not one dime. We both worked for our cars and worked and paid for our education's. If it was good enough for us it is good enough for him. DH has the kids 35-40 percent of the time and pays her full child support, and all the health insurance.
This witch will have to pay it herself, but then again she breaks promises to them and lies to them so I am sure she will tell him it is DH'S fault he doesn't get a car, and he will have to remind his son who made the promise.
Stick to your guns. No child is owed a car.
We did tell her that it was
We did tell her that it was discussed and bm changed her mind. That we haven't budgeted for it. End of discussion. I just know that bm is going to be blaming it on me ..... Cuz I'm the evil step monster.
Not my step kid. U must be
Not my step kid. U must be thinking of someone else
I just know that bm is going
I just know that bm is going to be blaming it on me
This is probably true but, really, who cares? I have never cared if BM or SD blame me for not getting their way. Doesn't affect my life whatsoever and making me the scapegoat doesn't change a thing.
And your SD doesn't even want a car anyway? So, this is for BM's benefit, then.
That's where it becomes my
That's where it becomes my issue. I know that. I shouldn't care if I am considered the wicked bitch. But I'm an ass and I do. Lol
And yes it's totally for bm benefit and to make her look like the perfect mom to her kid (kid knows better tho. Lol)
You should have told her the
You should have told her the amount of the CS. Women need to realize once you get CS that is all you are entitled too. They think that they are doing something to the men when they take them down there and then they want extra. Unless he has extra on his paycheck my answer would be hell no!
I bought my DS17 a car this
I bought my DS17 a car this past January - ONLY - because I work and I needed help getting his sisters to and from their many activities. I pay the car payment and insurance and he pays the gas through high school. After that, he can keep the car but everything reverts to him. He helps with his siblings and works at a local restaurant.
If he was a brat or failing school, hell No I would not have purchased him a car. And btw - I never mentioned to his bio-dad helping to pay for any of it because he is an ass and because I receive child support.