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Question.....

LoveMYBoys's picture

Submitted by LoveMYBoys on Thu, 03/12/2009 - 1:32pm

My DH and the ex have a court order that states that any dental or medical expenses not covered by insurance be shared 60/40, with him paying the 60%. The parent who owes the other, has 30 days to pay in full from the date the receipt is provided for reimbursement. This order has been in effect for a little over a year. The first instance, she did not pay us within 30 days but when asked about our payment she said for DH to just to deduct it from the next child support payment which DH did, and made a notation of it on the memo line of the check. The second time, we owed her so DH added his portion to the child support check within the 30 day period. Both visits to the dentist and doctor were done by her. Well, the third instance, DH took SS to the dentist. That was last May. We immediately provided her a receipt and 30 days were up last June. Her portion owed.. $11.50!! To this day, we haven't seen it! It's not even about the money, it's the principle. When DH mentioned a few months later about her portion owed, she said that she would pay the institution directly and we could get payment from them. Institution??WTF! SO, this brings me to my real question. She took SS back for dental work this week and called to say she would be sending the receipt. How would you all handle it? Deduct her portion and pay the rest within 30 days? Should he direct her to the "institution" (that alone cracks me up!)?? Should we tell her that we will settle once we recieve her payment? I realize it's a court order but she's technically already in contempt for not paying her portion. Or do we just take the high road and pay in full within the 30 day timeframe? Thanks!

Comments

smurfy1smile's picture

Submitted by smurfy1smile on Thu, 03/12/2009 - 1:52pm

I have had to get court ordered judgements against my BS17's BF many time since he refused to reimburse me. Check with the dentist and see if she paid the $11.50, if not, take it out of her CS and make a notation as you have done in the past.

Stupid is as stupid does.

LoveMYBoys's picture

Submitted by LoveMYBoys on Thu, 03/12/2009 - 2:03pm

Thank you. We will check with the dentist to be sure...however, that would be a miracle!!

sparky's picture

Submitted by sparky on Thu, 03/12/2009 - 2:04pm

Dont deduct anything from the CS because that will only get you in trouble down the line. Make a copy of your court order and put it in the child's chart. After the ins pays you pay your 60% directly to the business and tell them to send a bill to you for the 60%. They will have to get the 40% out of her.

stepmom2one's picture

Submitted by stepmom2one on Thu, 03/12/2009 - 2:29pm

I would not deduct from CS even at her request. If you give her the CS direct I would just write the check for the full amount and demand a check in return for the expenses. If you owe her I would write out a separ. check with "dental expenses in full" on the memo line.

If she still owes you the $11.50 I would send her a copy of the reciept again. Write on the reciept "second attempt to collect--30 days past due" then make another copy. Remind her it was due in 30 days per court order. That should get her attention.

In the future I would ask the dentist if the can bill you each your portion. Explain or give a copy of the part of the court order. Most places deal with this often (all biz around splits it up for you). If they cannot I would pay jsut your 60% and give the remainder bill to BM. Write on there it is due in 30 days to dentist, to let you know if she can not pay him direct within that time so you can pay it to aviod a collections on your credit. If she cannot pay within 30 days she will be in contempt of court. Make a copy--if not paid in 30 days send it again...adding the note you wrote about 2nd attempt blah blah....

If she does this enough times for you to hold take her to court (she will have to pay your legal fees) then you have all the proof. She'll be screwed.

Catlover's picture

Submitted by Catlover on Fri, 03/13/2009 - 11:06am

Due to the fact that BM is terrible with money we pay the medical and dental and then have her reimburse us. This is mostly due to the fact that BM would not pay her portion, and then we'd get tagged with late fees and/or collections. I am not ruining my credit for her!! BM was terrible about reimbursing us for skid expenses. DH and I maintain a spreadsheet with copies of all receipts. We copy it and submit it to her monthly. She never paid. We just kept adding and adding, and finally when she owed us $1000, we took her to court for nonpayment. She ended up having to pay us (slam dunk for us with all receipts and the spreadsheet as proof), was held in contempt etc. Now she pays us within a week as she knows we will pursue it. Moral of the story..... avoid the fight. Give her copies of receipts (don't subtract from CS as previously noted), keep track of your expenses, and when the amount she owes you grows to a large enough amount to warrant it, then take her to court with all your documentation.

"Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean people aren't out to get me"