are there many of you that have to send the child support to the state? My H got letter from state saying he is now ordered to send his payment to state from here on out and anything given to BM after this point would be considered a gift. So our attorney calls the child support office to see why we now have to send to state and come to find out BM is getting some type of state aid and that is why. I am new to site and you may not know that we have filed a petition to modify the custody and child suppot. BM had not received that yet but should within the next week however she has gotten the petition to change to the county where she lives and when she called to ask about that H told her we were going back to court for child support etc. So at first we thought the letter from the state was because she was trying to get back at H for taking her back to court and had been saying she was tired of signing receipts and could not wait to get this through the state. Up until Aug. of last year she got the $140 cash everyweek and signed a receipt. Well she kept being a bully so my H started writing her a check and making her sign receipt. On the weekend we get ss he gives her check when he picks him up. Use to on the weekend we did not have him we would drive the 25 miles one way to her house and drop off the payment. Well BM threw a big fit one day when things were not going her way and said we were not allowed out there anymore and so my H told her then you will need to come and get the check if you do not want me out there. Well she started doing that. She would call on Tuesday to make sure H had her money. Well when tax returns came out she started not coming to get the child support then once all that was gone she was on the horn yelling at my H that he needed to get her her money and that he was suppose to bring it to her and H told her you told us we were not allowed out there anymore on your weekend and she said that's right I do not want you visting with or talking to our son when you are here. Danged if you do and danged if you don't with her. Anyway apparently she is getting help from state so that is why we have to send the money to the state and I have not heard any good about the state method and that they are always messing up what the parent owes. Any one have any advice or comments on that? should we continue to pay 1/2 of copays to her would that be considered a gift?

I am just feeling so stressed and wore down. I feel we have good case to get the week at a time with ss. H is current on his child support, we carry health, dental and vision insurance, we pay 1/2 of all copays and deductibles, 1/2 of sports he does and buys him school clothes for warm weather and cold weather. BM however has a volitle relationship with her signifigant other and has moved 8 times since her and H divorced over 5 years ago. SS has been to 4 different schools. He has ADD and she does not give him his meds regularly to the point ss has told teacher at school that he did not feel right and needed to take his med. He has missed 16 days of school this past year and was tardy 10 times. She totally interferes with ss and H relationship. SS has a big heart and wants to make everyone happy and she makes him feel so bad for loving his dad and me. When he acts up she tells him he is nothing but a little "John Doe" -insert my husbands name. Well SS cries. She constantly cusses and berates my H infront of ss and when ss is with her he acts like her and treats us like she does but when he is with us it is all I missed you I love you and I am so happy to see you. sorry so long there is just so much to tell. I will give it a rest for now.