Shower time
Does anyone have any suggestions for limiting the time SD13 spends in the shower? It's always a struggle to get her in there. Once she is in there she will take up to an hour long shower, if we let her. We've tried timers, they don't work. We've tried to talk to her about limiting her time in the shower, but that fell on deaf ears. Our last water bill was almost $500 FOR A MONTH! Normally it's around $110 per month. I'm desperate for suggestions that will limit her time without us having to police her and stand outside the bathroom door. Should we make her pay the increase in the last water bill?
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thats a problem
we have the same, both skids take really really long showers. We basically have to yell to get them out. Not sure what eles to do. Having her pay for the bill would be nice..but realistically i dont think it will happen, but i like the idea.
You might try installing a
JamaicanMeCrazy
DISNEY LIED...THERE IS NO 'HAPPILY EVER AFTER'
"governor" on the shower. My dad used to install one on his shower when my BIL would come visit because BIL would drain the hot water tank. Since it slows the flow of water, your SD may still stay in the shower as long, but she won't be using as much water.
I believe you can purchase them at Lowes, Home Depot or any hardware store and installation is easy and you can always remove them when you want a nice, long hot shower!
Shower Gadget
I located one at our local hardware store! Thank you so much for the suggestion. I didn't even know they existed. We got to hear screaming last night about the decrease in water. It does just limit the flow, but the good thing is that SD13 thinks that is just one step and that it will eventually shut off the water. It was great! Granted it ended up being an 18 minute shower, but still that is a BIG improvement! Thank you so much for the suggestion.
Turn off the hot water
If you have a hot water tank, just turn off the hot water when she's been the shower long enough. Warn her about the time limit and what you will do. A few cold rinse-offs and she should get it. Be prepared for a lot of screaming and whining.
I know it sounds mean, but it works. You bill is unbelievable!
This is
a great idea }:)
Wish I could have.
But I have no clue where our hot water shut off is. I know it isn't in our apartment. I think it's in the utility room in our garage, and I'm not entirely sure what one is ours since we live in an apartment. I would hate to shut off our neighbors.
yes
Yes, definitely make her pay for it. If she doesn't have any money then deduct it from her birtday and christmas presents. Find out where the cut off valve is for you house, give her 15 minutes and then turn it off.
I agree
with jamaicanmecrazy with buying the shower gadget but make her pay for it.
After the alotted time if
After the alotted time if she isn't out cut the breaker off to the bathroom. I am sure it will piss her off to shower in the dark. Or make sure everyone in the house gets a shower before her so there is not enough hot water for a hour long shower. Constantly flush the toilet. Turn your dishwasher on that always messes with the shower. Or here is a good one once her time is up if she isn't out poor a bucket of ice water on her. J/K lol Serious about hte other ones.
Tried using other water sources
I have tried the dishwasher and washer trick. I thought I was being clever. Little did I know that they don't use hot water. They take in cold water and heat it. At least that explained why it takes 158 minutes for my dishwasher to do a complete cycle and over an hour and a half for my washer. The toilet trick didn't even work.
Make her take a bath
I had the same problem with BS11. I told him that if he couldn't take quicker showers, I threatened to starting running his bathwater for him, to supervise the amount and temperature used. So far, it's worked wonders!
bath
If I ran a bath for her she would NEVER get out. She can only take baths when she doesn't have school the next day. She has been known to spend two hours in a bath.
My SD doesn't just take long showers
She will take multiple showers a day if we don't say no. Just another micromanaging issue we are faced with due to the BPD/BP.
I like the suggestions above. Our tactic is to turn on the washer, dishwasher and our shower if need be. It doesn't take long for her to get out because our water pressure drops to nil if several things are on.
Does she get angry when you try to set any normal boundary like this?
"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra
Holy buckets!!
Where do you live? My water will is $86 every THREE MONTHS. Even in the summer time and my BS has a 3 ft pool we have to refill constantly becuz so much grass gets in it.
water bill
We live in Europe. Water is SUPER expensive. We try to be so careful with our water consumption, but she just blows it for us.
water
Our water and sewage is 100. per month. I cant imagine what it would be if there was a person here taking long showers.
Water wasting
I know it bugs me that SD is so compulsive/impulsive regarding waste. She is always filling her cereal bowl mulitple times, eats til she has her fill, then dumps out what's left. This is another manifestation of her BPD issues, as many issues are that normal teens would grow out of or try to comply to stop hearing us complain. SD also is like this with water/showers. She will use every drop of hot water in the tank if we don't tell her to stop and get out, even if everyone else needs to shower to go to church or something. I tried approaching her from an environmental stand point, because we have well water so SD perceives it as "free" no matter how much we tell her it's still not- ie water filters softener salt, water heater, softener salt and pressure tank DO cost us money.) So I tried the environmental argument.
This peeves SD to no end. Part of BPD is an incredible disdain for responsibility/accountability. SD thinks all things in life are disposable, and often destroys things by scribbling all over them with sharpie (not decorating or doodling in a decorative way, but writing something, scribbling it out, over and over again- even on things like calculators and portable cd players etc.)
She cannot stand I like to try to not waste things. It is an imposition on her lifestyle of consumption.
She has expressed an interest in engineering and DH suggested environmental engineering as an excellent and growing field. I told him I wouldn't push it, but try to find a way for her to come up with that herself so she will find it valuable.
"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra