DH's.

This man has many qualities which is why you paired up with him. One of them I would guess is that he caters to your needs and wants to a degree you found satisfying. But like every facet of a diamond there is a back side to it and he does this with everyone in his family. He's the peacemaker the one who doesn't confront anyone.

You'll have to accept that there are times when his quality backfires and becomes a liability at least from your point of view. Remember that most adults realize that a kid can be as manipulative as any adult plus there are probably many other reasons your partners family has decided to take you to task not the least of which is their sadness that his marriage didn't work out. Given time this likely will change - unless of course you start a war over it.

As for the kid take a gander at the article linked below and consider handling the kid accordingly. I suspect a lot of the problems the kid has with you will disappear and he might even turn around and find you attractive:

http://steptogether.org/disengaging.html