OMG.. please help!!
Ok.. bio mom is turning Jerry Springer on us..
Big blow up this week.. no need to go into details, she is basically wigging out and wants time to work on her marriage with the worst guy in the world.. it's sad really, but I'm not going there.
ANYWAYS.. we have shared parenting 50/50.. week on, week off. Now all of a sudden she wants to call it off.. she only wants the kids every other weekend and possibly never again.. not sure. The boys are set to go back this sunday at 4.. she says she won't be there and don't drop them off.. WTH??
What do we do? DH is like "I am not letting her get away with this - I am dropping them off." I agree somewhat.. but what damage will that do to them if their mom just abandons them? I don't want them to experience that.. but she needs to step up and get her head out of her ass.
Does anyone know our legal rights here? Help. please
Tell BM that you will take
Tell BM that you will take her for child support and see if that helps....
What a mess.
already said that.. she
already said that.. she makes no money.. and will relinquish her rights if need be..
They cant exactly force non
They cant exactly force non payers to work. Its usually they give the non payer a work log where they have to write down where they are looking for work. This is not the same in every state but in my town and surrounding towns, they will make them do community service until they can get a job where a withholding will then take effect.
The courts will impute income
The courts will impute income and assign a minimal amount due.
She canNOT terminate her rights unless there is someone who wishes to adopt (from what I have been told)
Does your husband not want
Does your husband not want the kids full time? I can see how it would be damaging to the children for them to know their mom doesn't want them but how do you think they would feel if you just let them go back to a woman that obviously doesn't want to have anything to do with them right now. How do you think they would feel if they had to go back to a woman that would straight up treat them like crap because she doesn't want them there? She can say she wants to sign over her rights but unless you are willing to adopt them then she is going to have a hard time getting a judge to allow her to just walk away...Maybe your situation is a little different then mine but if the BM in my situation said she just wanted to walk away I would be jumping all over that option. No way would my husband even think about sending my SD back to her mom if she said some stupid shit like that...If BM doesn't want them and your DH obviously doesn't want them all the time, wether it be he just cant have them all the time or he wants BM to have to do her part, then I feel sorry for those kids. Sorry but just my opinion...
I know this is damaging for
I know this is damaging for them.. and we aren't forcing her to see them.. but they want to see her and she lives one street over.. one street! So we literally drive by there all the time.. It's a mess and I feel horrible for these kids..
She is choosing a man over her kids.
Oh and yes we would take them
Oh and yes we would take them full time in a heartbeat.. but dammitt.. I mean, can she just all of a sudden 4 days before her week say "nah.. I'm done"...? How is that possible.. I guess I just don't get it..
I would take the kids over,
I would take the kids over, regardless, it's horrible for them to go through with this but I would much rather they saw for themselves than blamed you, once BM was done lying, or justifying, and making you out the bad guys for not taking them home.
I would bet she'll be at home! You are making your marraige work out including the kids, right? 50/50 means no child support, right? Are you in a position to have the kids needs met? BM's financial situation could improve, they could both work and pay child support in time.
The kids can be counselled that NONE OF THIS is their fault. Kids take in much more than we give them credit for often,
I agree with you somewhat..
I agree with you somewhat.. I don't want them to go thru this.. but I think they need to see it so they don't blame us and get manipulated by her down the road when her man dumps her and she all of a sudden wants to see her kids..
My relationship is ROCK SOLID and we could make it happen if we had them full time..
Yes.. we are getting the kids counseling regardless.. she has emotionally damaged them big time.
I would take the kids back as
I would take the kids back as she could just be setting you guys up besides all the other shitty choices/reasons she seems to have.
The sad thing in this is the
The sad thing in this is the kids....... what about the kids. I'm sure they are feeling now there mother doesn't want them and now their father is pissed off that he might have to have them full time. Even for Skids that is sad..
The kids have never been told
The kids have never been told we don't want them full time.. we do, however, tell them that we feel that both parents need to be involved in their lives..
Our kids bm did the exact
Our kids bm did the exact same thing 3 months after their divorce finalized ( 4 years ago ) and called now 4 months ago and outright cancelled and has only bothers to see them at her mothers for holiday desserts. She's dropped her calls to almost nothing. We don't bother cause she has no Money and neither does her perv husband. And its better for the kids cause she's as looser, don't try and fix what ain't broken. Kids are happy that's all that matters.