Sorry to burst your bubble
Yesterday, I think I caught DH off guard with some news. He has a job interview today that he is really excited about. It makes alot more money than his current job. However, it has an evening schedule. I work nights, as well. My kids go to school/daycare during the school year. And, they go to camp/daycare during the summer. ExH and I each pay a portion of the costs. Well, DH was talking about how excited he was to have SDs next summer. He said, "If I have this job, it will work out so great. I will be at work while SDs are sleeping. I can spend my days with them."
My reply, "No you won't. You would have to sleep during the days, which means YOU are going to have to provide daycare for them. I am not going to have them running around our house all day while we are sleeping. And, we both know they would be in here, waking us up every 5 minutes. ExH and I provide daycare. You and the snowbeast can provide it for your kids."
He looked like I punched him in the stomach. Oh well. It's better that we sort it out now rather than later.
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Good for you. I need to learn
Good for you. I need to learn to say NO!
I agree with you. He's
I agree with you. He's delusional for not realizing he will need to sleep during the day. There's no way I'd want kids running around my house while I'm trying to sleep. How old are they anyway?
My husband doesn't think ahead like this either. He gets all excited about how things are going to work out with his daughter and I always have to point out the problems. Maybe it's a guilty Dad thing.
They are 10 and 8. There are
They are 10 and 8. There are some kids at this age that you probably could trust to stay in the house while you were sleeping. But these two are not mature enough. They live with BM most of the time. She lets them run wild. There is no way I would trust them alone for several hours. I feel like I am doing DH a favor. If those two woke me up numerous times after I pulled a 12 hour shift, there would be hell to pay.
My DH works night shift and
My DH works night shift and in the summer on our week of parenting there are five kids in the home, ages 15, 14, 12, 12 and 8. Now although I am not going to say they are perfectly quiet, they all know (including my bios) that they are to be respectful of dad/stepdad sleeping since he worked all night while they slept. Granted two of the four older ones are in that, "I'm a teen so I sleep until noon" phase, the middle ones are generally quiet and if they want to do something they go down to the kid room and watch TV or play games. The 8 yr old can at times be an issue but he too has in the last year figured out to discuss things with his older sister, or to call/text mom. That if he wants to go to a friend's in the neighborhood a note has to be left or SF and he has to check in at 2:00 which is about when DH wakes up.
HOWEVER, that requires the kids be mature and respectful enough to act this way. My skids are used to this as this has always been their life and therefore not odd to them. My bios, mostly younger had some adjusting to do. I did offer to put my son at least in daycare but DH insisted it was not necessary. My skids are not responsible nor mature enough for many things, but this they get because it's dad and it's how it's always been, so I see nothing wrong with you telling your DH that his kids will need to go to daycare while you both sleep. Besides, tension and arguments tend to happen more frequently when you are sleep deprived and cranky...plus all kids out of the house...maybe you could get a little relaxer before falling asleep or a little sexy wake up call...or both!! Putting it that way for him may well make him get right back to being excited about the job
No, it is almost double his
No, it is almost double his pay at his current job. He only needs daycare for 5 weeks out of the year! He can afford it. He just has that guilty daddy thing going on because he sees them so little. I told him that he will get alot more quality time with them if he gets some sleep. Besides, he works a rotating schedule. One week he works 2 days and the next he works 5, so he has plenty of days off.