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I Should Have Bet Money

CastleJJ's picture

Submitted by CastleJJ on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 7:21am

BM emailed DH yesterday to update him on their summer travel plans. She said they aren't going to the Europe anymore, made no mention of going to Florida (which SS said they only wanted to do because we took SS there last month), etc. She said at this point, their only plans this summer are camping for 2 days in a bordering state. She mentioned that they may also go to Canada for a day trip (which she has been promising SS for 5 years and they've never been despite us living an hour from the border). The poor kid really wants to cross the border just to say he's "left the country" like most of his friends. 

DH and I just chuckled and rolled our eyes. Poor SS12. All these promised trips to far off lands result in either no trip or a significantly underwhelming replacement. Two weeks in Europe turns into a weekend tent camping, a week at BM's parents' house, etc. Yet BM and GF took a 3-week, lavish honeymoon to Europe last year. 

At least when DH and I promise we are going to take SS on a trip, the trip is already booked and we are going. DH and I are looking into taking SS on a cruise for Spring Break 2025. I am finding some killer deals that would make it extremely reasonable to go. DH and I laughed, saying it may be the only way SS will ever leave the country since Canada clearly isn't happening. I just dread trying to coordinate purchasing or obtaining a passport for SS without BM playing games which leads to my hesitancy in booking. 

Comments

notarelative's picture

Submitted by notarelative on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 7:54am

You should have bet money, but to bet someone has to be willing to take the bet. I doubt,that with her history, anyone would bet that BM would actually take her child to Europe.

As to a cruise, I have read that there are some that do not require a passport if the cruise begins and ends in the USA. 

CastleJJ's picture

Submitted by CastleJJ on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 8:07am

That is true, but if there was an emergency that required us to fly home from a port, we would be stranded. Better to be safe than sorry. 

Rumplestiltskin's picture

Submitted by Rumplestiltskin on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 8:39am

That BM is horrible. Pawns off the boring parenting onto GF and fills GF's head with crap to make her dislike you guys and do BM's bidding. Doesn't even follow through with her pie-in-the-sky vacation promises to SS. What does your BM even do? Pay the bills with a good job? But i bet GF works a fulltime job on top of everything else, but has zero control or rights. If and when GF ever wises up, maybe she can be your ally. I know GF works against you guys but i feel bad for the woman. She does it all for most of the year while BM gets the child support, the glory (i just know she brags to everyone irl and on social media about how great and suffering of a mom she is), and BM has all the control.

I know all that was pretty black and white and based on limited info, but that's how i see it. Your BM sucks. 

CastleJJ's picture

Submitted by CastleJJ on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 9:49am

We don't know if SS already has a passport or needs one. Regardless, to drive from the US to Canada, kids under 16 only need proof of US citizenship via birth certificate. 

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 12:14pm

So ask ĥim If he has a passport. It's a  perfectly normal question. If he asks why - just in case we ever plan a holiday abroad. At worst, it will incites  bm to follow up on her promises.

CastleJJ's picture

Submitted by CastleJJ on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 1:33pm

We asked SS if he does. He didn't know. We asked him if he recently went to the post office or somewhere to get his photo taken, he doesnt remember. BM acts like he has one, but no idea if he actually does or not. We did mention taking SS on a cruise at some point, which he seemed excited about. 

dragonfly878's picture

Submitted by dragonfly878 on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 11:32am

Could your DH respond- "thanks for the update. Thats too bad he seemed to really be looking forward to it."

Subtle, but let's her know she's a letdown mother 

MissK03's picture

Submitted by MissK03 on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 1:18pm

If leaving from a US port you do not need a passport. As it comes for getting a passport for children... both parents have to be present or there needs to be a notarized letter from one allowing other parent to obtain passport. 

I don't think she can get one without DH. 

CastleJJ's picture

Submitted by CastleJJ on Sat, 07/06/2024 - 1:53pm

BM mentioned us splitting passport costs years ago when we considered booking a cruise. We ended up picking a different vacation back then, so we never ended up needing one, but I don't know if BM ever just got SS a passport or not. 

grannyd's picture

Submitted by grannyd on Mon, 07/08/2024 - 1:46pm

...the teen years are fast approaching, so that may help.

Good point, NSHTD! What gets me the most about the harridan is that she's such a dog in the manger. She shuffles the boy off to whomever she can but God forbid that his loving father should spend a reasonable amount of time with him! URG!

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Mon, 07/08/2024 - 8:44am

Those islands if the ship axtuallys stops at islanders, most are cruise company private islands now.  Are under different government. Different rules.  And you are right if you have to fly home a passaport is most likely needed