The Dreaded Braces
BM emailed DH tonight that SD11.5 needs braces. She has scheduled a consult with an orthodontist recommended by her friends for later this month and will contact DH after to discuss finances. I have been dreading this since BM brought it up last year and I have a feeling she will demand a second set later in SS' teenage years. Does anyone have recent experiences with skid braces? Price? Insurance coverage?
BM has sole custody so we are at her mercy for decision making, although luckily, we only owe her 34% of the overall cost after insurance per our CO. The issue is, we don't have much of a savings currently and the CO forces us to pay the full amount of our portion within 28 days of receipt of payment/insurance coverage so we could have to pay a pretty penny very quickly while BM sets up her portion on payment plan with the orthodontist.
Again, this is what being a walking ATM feels like. It wouldn't be annoying if DH actually had a say in decision making and could help select the orthodontist, review options, etc. But alas, it is what it is.
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Do not pay BM. Pay the Ortho directly.
And... set up the payment plan with them. There is no way the CO, or Courts would know that you set up a payment plan.
Never give BM money beyond CS. Ever, for any reason. If you have to participate in any payments beyond CS, pay the vendor directly and do not give BM another Cent.
Pay nothing more than exactly what the CO calls for.
Our CS order has clearly
Our CS order has clearly defined processes for medical expenses. Our state (and our CO specifically) requires that BM either pay the full amount or provide an invoice for amount due after insurance (if she does a payment plan). She then fills out an FOC reimbursement form and mails it to us with the invoice/EOB/Medical Payment Reciept. We then have 28 days from the date indicated on the FOC form to reimburse BM our portion in full. If it is not paid in full by the 28th day, BM can file a motion to have reimbursement fully enforced by the FOC, providing them that form and medical bills/invoices. We don't have a say in how that reimbursement occurs and cannot pay the provider directly. We have to follow this process and repay BM directly.
DH found a brochure on our county's FOC website about orthodontics specifically. It requires a lot of information from BM in regards to documentation and sounds like we may be able to pay her our portion on a monthly payment plan, if she does a monthly payment plan with the orthodontist. We are keeping the brochure in our back pocket until the financial conversation happens.
Whenever we reimburse BM, we write out a check for our portion, copy the form she sent and make a copy of the check, and mail the check and the copy of the form back to her. We then file the copy of the check and the original form in our records. Then, when she deposits the check, we print the check deposit confirmation that our bank provides, showing the check, BM's signature on the back of the check, and the date it was cashed. We also print the ledger, showing the money being withdrawn from our account. If BM wanted to argue we never paid, good luck, we have way too much proof of payment for every reimbursement request.
Can you also contact the FOC
Can you also contact the FOC and specifically ask about payment options. In our case, we paid the ortho directly, but DH also has legal custody and medical decision-making rights.
11 seems very young for braces.
11 seems very young for braces. I know you don't have much control, but I would sure ask for as much documentation and justification as possible. The biggest problem is getting an 11 year old to take care of their braces - it takes a lot of work! So sorry this is just one more thing she can be difficult about.
In our case
The Girhippo had braces put on them the second they turned EIGHT for the older two. She knew that the CS would be bumped up monthly to include ortho upon her request. Chef "trusted" the Gir to apprise him. BIG mistake. She provided no info or invoices. Years went by with us (me) paying the extra CS "for braces." We (I) ended up paying twice the amount of the TOTAL owed until I caught it. Magistrate couldn't have cared less. We still would have been paying that extra CS to this day 19 years later had I not caught it.
Magistrate ruled it a "gift to the Mother." No reimbursement was ordered. AND Chef's ferals were extremely immature for their age/irresponsible so no care was taken of the braces and it looks as though they never had braces (they are naturally fairly straight like Chef's teeth but have tooth decay/yellowing)
She never put braces on the youngest bc we had gotten wise after the first debacle and demanded the invoice. Of all the three, the youngest needed the braces the most as he inherited her crooked teeth (which were corrected by braces on the Gir).
I had braces by age 12. Lots
I had braces by age 12. Lots of teeth issues. For three years. Took care of them fine because I was taught to.
Around here 11 or 12 is
Around here 11 or 12 is pretty customary. Most kids are out of their braces by the end of 8th grade. The kids who need palate expanders and the like start earlier.
11 is on par with braces.
11 is on par with braces. Most kids are done before high school and will have them 1-2 yrs depending on how much work has to be done.
I would say that she should consult 2 orthodontists and have at least 2-3 different braces options. There are like 5 types of braces, so cost, length of time and the child's comfort all need to be taken into account when making the decision. Surprisingly traditional metal braces and Invisalign have minimal cost difference.
For my stepson it was almost 5k about 4 yrs ago, our insurance paid $1500 towards it and then DH had to pay 70% of the balance. My kids got lucky and were fine with just pallet expanders while they were younger. $300 each and done! Perfect teeth now.
BM has made it clear to DH
BM has made it clear to DH that she is going with this orthodontist regardless of cost. She will not be getting second or third opinions. I am concerned because the website shows 5 different types of braces offered and I am concerned BM will pick the "Cadillac" of braces because they are the best, despite the price tag. BM tends to pick things because they are best, not because they do anything differently or have a better outcome.
Is he getting Stage 1 braces,
Is he getting Stage 1 braces, which is all about prepping the jaw and making space for incoming adult teeth, usually retainers or head gear or neck gear are involved. My BD17 had stage 1 and 2 braces which in total cost us 3000.00 out of pocket (after insurance) over the course for seven years. She finally got her braces off last month.
My BS did Stage 2 braces (all his adult teeth were in, it was just about straightening), that took about three years and cost us 1500.00 out of pocket after insurance.
We aren't sure. All but one
We aren't sure. All but one of SS' adult teeth are in, so I'm not sure what he will need. Luckily, his teeth are already pretty straight, so I'm hoping the need is minimal.
My son was 7 when he got
My son was 7 when he got braces for his top teeth. The dentist referred us to an orthodontist because she had concerns. He'd had some problems with his teeth at a very young age and it wasn't lack of brushing. We found out he had a few problems with his mouth. He had an under bite and his palate was small, not allowing enough room for his teeth, which in turn caused problems. He ended up needing a palate expander, braces, and a headset that would encourage his upper jaw to grow and slow down growth of his lower jaw. Poor little guy had to deal with so much metal in his mouth. Last visit with the orthodontist was a couple of years ago and he was again concerned about his jaw. He said we'd just watch it for now because his jaw wasn't done growing. He may have to have treatment in the future as an adult. The alternative was to wait and he'd definitely have to have surgery as an adult to correct things. Hopefully we were able to correct things in time and he won't have to worry about it in the future. They try to catch things around age 7 here. IIRC, he was done with everything at around 9 as far as all the metal. He still went to the orthodontist for rechecks for a while. We ended up spending $960 for the treatment which is really not bad compared to what I have read here. It added up to more after the dental work too.
He's 13 and hasn't complained about any problems with his mouth.
And yes, good luck on him
And yes, good luck on him actually taking care of his teeth and his braces. That was not fun. Luckily my dentist cleaned my son's teeth every 3 months instead of every 6, so that helped.
I'd ask for all of the documentation you can get. This BM sounds like she wants to drain you guys dry, all the while saying she's spent so much and sacrificed so much for her baby boy. Look what a wonderful mommy she is.
Ugh braces!
We paid for SD31's braces 15 years ago and our teenage BS just got his braces off this year, after going through the whole top braces, palate expander, full set of braces multi year ortho-extravaganza PetSpoiler described.
For SD, knowing braces were coming, we actually switched dental insurance the year before to an HMO plan that had a flat $1500 fee for braces if we used an in-network orthodontist. We paid it all, BM said her teeth were fine and paid $0 and the court let her get away with it.
For BS, I had changed jobs and that ins was no longer available. I think the full cost was $5400 for the entire 3 step, multi year process. My insurance paid $1500 and so did DH's and the office had a payment plan for the rest at $100/month until it was paid off.
who has the dental insurance on SS? Might be worth it to pay for it and have double insurance to pay for the braces at least in part. Most policies have a $1000-1500 limit for braces but double that makes it not so bad to split the remainder. Are you in open enrollment now or sometime this fall? Might be worth it to investigate before the braces go on. Would BM be willing to delay until your dental insurance takes effect too?
BM has SS on her dental
BM has SS on her dental insurance. Our CO orders that since she has sole custody and sole decision making, she is the one to carry the insurance, so she doesn't have to work with DH to figure out the insurance piece. We discussed dual insuring SS on both DH and BM's healthcare plans and BM refused and the courts agreed, so we don't have SS on dental.
It seems like based on everyone's experiences here, $5000 is a good rough estimate. If insurance covers $1500 which seems to be the standard, that brings it down to $3500. BM hasn't hit her annual healthcare obligation under the CS order, so she has to pay $445 out of pocket before she can bill us anything (since DH's CS pays the $445 to begin with). That brings it down to roughly $3000 and we would owe 33% of that so about $1000. That's not horrible compared to what it could be. And if we can do it on a payment plan, even better.
It probably varies by dentist
It probably varies by dentist and your area. My sister just finished Invisalign, and it was $6000. BM recently told DH (in anticipation of braces for SD11, I'm sure) that her stepson's traditional metal braces were $6500, and he started 2 years ago (he got them off a couple months ago). Hopefully your SS's will be less!
Though COd to pay for half of all med related expenses not
covered by medical insurance, they never paid a penny. Co pays for office visits, Rx's, ER visits, etc.... We engaged the ball-less wonder of a Judge, he told us that we had to take them to small claims court and to not go back to him or further waste his time on the topic.We did file a complaint with the Judicial Review Board (Called the The Commission on Judicial Fitness and Disability - in SpermLand).. One of a few that we filed on that robed moron. No idea if anything ever came from those complaints. But.. we made sure the robed dipshit knew he was a dipshit.
So, we still bill them twice a year for all of the SKid medical costs they refused to pay. We add penalties and interest per the IRS tables, added to a multi tab'd spread sheet showing the progression for each year for the past 20 or so, and inform them that we reserve the right to sue them if they continue to refuse to pay.
They whine and cry, accuse us of being mean and vindictive. SS knows that they still have not paid. One of the many issues he has with them and in part why he has pretty much written them off.
We will bill them twice a year forever at this point. If for no other reason than to continue to remind them that they are a collective POS. With penalties and interest, they are approaching $20K.
Braces take a year to two to be completed
Everyone I know of pays by the month. In 12 . 18. Payments. No one can pay the Thw whole cost. DH must talk with BM get a copy of payment schedule. And pay his 38% a month. There is pre braces...braced.. after braces. It's goes on and on. welcome to parenting