Anyone has any suggestions on how to not let SKids RUIN your MARRIAGE
I must say that I am inches away from LEAVING! My DH tells me I give her TOO much power, but I am really SICK of this child. My SD15 is really making me dislike my DH and I think she is ruining my marriage. My DH keeps telling me that I am allowing her to take my power and it won't get any better until I stop giving her that much control. How do you NOT let your skid have sooooo much control over your life?
My DH has his flaws, as I do as well, but I can honestly say I am tired of dealing with this devil possesed skid. She literally makes me want to barf everytime I see her. I have gone to say I don't want SD15 to even come back to our house. She's just not welcomed anymore.
- Roseybird's blog
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I read over a few of your
I read over a few of your blogs and have to ask...how often do you get the kid? I would like to help, but need a little more info. What is the problem with your skid?
Ok, she's 15 - teenager brat
Ok, she's 15 - teenager brat possessed with the devil }:) . It really started getting worse after I had my last son - he's 8 months now. Anyway, she started a fire in her room because she was pissed off with her daddy telling her no. My baby was only 2 weeks old - we had been from the hospital only a week. My husband immediately took her to the psych ward at the nearest hospital. She's been in and out of hospitals (supposedly suffering from depression) however, it only happens when she gets upset if her daddy won't allow her to do something or refuses to give her money. Her mother (the BM) is a lazy non-working, bum. She doesn't do anything and I honestly think she's scared of her daughter because she thinks SD15 has more sense than her. My DH never really dated her, just slept with her while they were in college. So, she knows nothing could ever exist between the two of them.
Also, I have a 3 year old boy as well. Anyway, Sd15 been having sexx for at least a year and thinks she's GROWN. Every time she has sex, she claims to be preggo a few weeks later. That story we are tired of hearing so we got her on the shot and she's fixed until July. The last battle was I had it up to HERE with her and I made her take a pregnancy test. Because I didn't trust her and everyone (the BM and the SD15 aunt said they saw a positive preggo test) I made her test it again. I made her stay in the bathroom for 45 minutes, being stubborn, and saying she didn't have to pee. I was like commander and chief as I wouldn't let her leave until she gave me pee. Finally, got pee, fussed at her for causing so much problems, and sent her home. My DH just was relieved she wasn't preggo. But I am just tired of it. Before she left to go home, DH sent her to the room and we talked (he was trying to calm me down). In all of that moment, that b*tch got a cup (drinking cup from her room) and PEEd in that cup. She left it there and it stunk up my house for a whole week.
I was done. We haven't addressed it with her yet because she hasn't come back over. She lives about 40 miles away and I think she refuses to come back because this was the first time that I actually 'got in her face' 'told her exactly what was on my mind' 'held nothing back'. I've been more of the person that tells DH what to do with her. He listens, but then SD15 stabs him in the back afterwards - oh, then sometimes I am the blame because he felt if he wouldn't have done that then she wouldn't have tried to drown herself or do some type of bodily harm to herself. However, I feel those are just attempts to get ATTENTION again.
So that's it, in a nutshell.
made a conscious decision to
made a conscious decision to no longer care what my SSs did or didn't do
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I did the same thing with my SS. It helped SOOOO much. Your whole post is great. I hope the OP reads it and takes the advice.
The last battle was I had it
The last battle was I had it up to HERE with her and I made her take a pregnancy test.
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Ok…IMHO…you need to dis engage ASAP. Do not wait. It does not even sound like you all see the skid that much. Please read Echo’s post and take the advice to heart. In my opinion there is NOOO reason for YOU to be the one to MAKE her take a PG test. If her dad wants to know, let HIM make her take a test. It is his kid.
Please step back from the skid and count your luck stars she is not 10 and living with you!!! Good luck.
Is1988 you give Great advice!
Is1988 you give Great advice! Rosy should not have to endanger her baby or herself by putting up with this crap. Dad needs to drive to visit kid if he can't ensure wife and new babies safety. I only hope this is an option as sometimes the other bio parent is not willing to take full custody. Just wait til this little troublemaker becomes a mother herself since she is in such a rush. Then she'll never be the center of attention again and will have to grow up real fast. Or she will try and bleed sympathy and push the responsibility off on her parents if she can. Either way, Rosy should not have to live like this.
Oh, Willow, I was in your
Oh, Willow, I was in your place just a few years ago. SD was out of control after years of her BM's hands off parenting. In the past SD has threatened the life of my baby, regularly stole from us, tampered with my mouthwash, destroyed and damaged walls & furniture, and totaled 2 of our cars, and so much more I can't even go into it here. But a couple of hospitalizations, a lot of expensive therapy and many psychiatric drugs have helped. SD is now 21 and in the army. She visited after the holidays and we actually enjoyed her! She has grown up a lot. Our relationship is not perfect but so much better than it was.
So hang in there and insist that DH get her some help. Five years have made such a difference. I now enjoy peace and happiness. My DH is happy again and our family life is fantastic.
Thanks you guys! I actually
Thanks you guys! I actually took a LONG walk for lunch, listened to some music, and came back and read your posts. I actually feel better! I am going to learn to disengage. I am going to learn to ignore. Yes, she is 15 and will not always be near us. I pray she goes out of state to college or wherever the GOOD Lord sends here (hopefully it won't be jail). I know each day it's going to get better. I have to keep trusting that GOD is preparing me for something GREATER! And this is just one obstacle to teach me something (don't know what it is, but maybe I will learn it soon).