My SS is ruining my pregnancy!
So, my little devil of a SS is ruining everything about my pregnancy. It's my first child and I don't get to have any of those special moments with my husband. He ruined my wedding and now he's hooked his claws into this and making it a shitty experience. He lives with us fulltime. I wish he didn't. I cannot stand the little boy. Don't even want to be around him. I am honestly considering leaving my husband because of how much I dislike his kid.
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What does he usually do so
What does he usually do so you consider him ruining your pregnancy time?
I assume it sux when its your first pregnancy and your husband has been there done that.. i think that also elevates your resentment though. Inclusive hormonal package too. Hang in there.
He is almost 7 and is no
He is almost 7 and is no longer capable of doing anything. He can't dress himself, do any of his chores, play with his toys or use the bathroom. Of course my DH feeds into this and babies him and all this usually happens when there is something going on with the pregnancy or planning for the new baby. I am going to have to give birth by myself because we have no one to take care of my SS and so DH is going to stay with him. He isn't even trying to figure out someone to take care of him. He thinks we should just let him sit in the waiting room by himself. I know this all seems like it is my husband and a lot of it is but we don't have these problems if the kid isn't around. DH feels bad for SS and refuses to actually parent him.
My bf's son is 9, and he does
My bf's son is 9, and he does the exact same things you are mentioning.
Talk to your husband. Explain to him that you want him in with you during your birth. Dont give that up.
Was he there when that boy was born?
I am afraid that 90% of these
I am afraid that 90% of these men wont snap out of guilty daddy issue. First child is special to him, moreso that he is oh so poor from broken family. Your child will have both parents with him constantly, so he needs to pay more attention to his poor firstborn.
Im feeling like puking :sick:
He does have the guilty daddy
He does have the guilty daddy big time especially because we had to remove the SS from the mom's house. She wasn't feeding him and they lived in roaches and he didn't have clothes. DH didn't know the situation was that bad because there was a lot of distance between the homes. I feel bad about it but he has lived with us for 3 years and is well taken care of. It's not a concern anymore.
Some of the same things
Some of the same things happened during my pregnancy, and it was really hard to deal with. I had a lot of complications with my pregnancy, and SS7's constant tantrums didn't help anything. I finally got to a point where I had to disengage to survive through it, and it helped a lot.
Some ways I disengaged and took care of myself were to go out with friends/co-workers, getting massages, reading books, telling DH that I wanted some quality one-on-one time without SS7, and therapy.
I told DH that I needed to step back because the stress wasn't going to help anything, especially my pregnancy. I think it annoyed him, but he understood and let me have my own time in my room or elsewhere. And now I have a beautiful daughter as proof of that process working.
Now that my daughter has been born, and my DH still babies his son, I recently told him that if he continues that kind of parenting, his daughter was going to end up resenting him for all of the attention her bad-behaving brother will get. For some reason, that has hit home with him, and he's been better about things.
Concerning him watching his son instead of being with you, that's absolute crap! I personally would be blunt with him and say that if he wants to not have a 2nd ex-wife, he'd better find a friend or family member to watch his son so that he can be with you. I would never settle for that, and I'd bitch about it until I got what I wanted.