it was some what a secret...i hinted about it...like i found a blog of step mothers who share advice and stuff like that. dh never had an interest in asking me about it and i left it at that, i would check it at work or at home while he was at work. from time to time i would share information with him i got on here, for example, "on my step parent blog, some of the other step mothers do this or that with skids and bm...maybe that would work for us" usually he would agree or just kind of ignore where it was that i was getting the info from. one time he clicked on it because it was in the history. he was home from work..i was driving to work, i was still signed in and he read a private message between myself and another member. it told some of dh's deepest darkest secrets, and the member and i shared our similar stories because she was already married and i wasnt and i was asking her for advice...DH read all of it, and all my blogs by the time i reached work!

we had a huge fight, dh was heart broken that i told his personal info to some one. i posted a blog to ask for how to delete my account, members repeatedly posted with support, and my dh saw how supportive and encouraging this site was for me! He calmed down (and realized that the info about him was only told to one member not all) he called me and said, i see why you are on this thing please dont tell the things about me that you did, but if you feel this site helps you then please use it. now we kind of joke about it, and i go on when hes home and even read him some of the posts.

he might surprise you and be okay with you on here if he did ever find out. your inlaws sound similar to mine, the whole stuck up thing...what i realized was, they felt inferior to me, and rather than examine their own shitty personalities they just called me stuck up...his mother and ex are extremely white trash, so my educated, well paid, popular, caring, Mercedes driving self is a huge threat to them and they try to attack me on all levels. They are just insecure and pathetic, if know one else tells you that you are stuck up then clearly they are the issue not you

Welcome to ST! In-law issues brought me here, too, and you will find you are in good company. Silly me, I never thought I wouldn't be accepted by DH's sisters! But there are a whole lot of weird dynamics in that family--the oldest rules with narcissistic abuse--and I stepped right in it with my assertive, open, friendly self. And then told them to back off when they were trashing DH and me. That was a mistake! Ha ha. You'll find a lot of support and common ground here!

This is why I have my own laptop! LOL. I did make an account on my laptop for H if he wants to use it and sometimes if it's convenient he'll use mine, but he always asks and would never snoop. I would be a lot more worried if we shared a computer, but luckily I got mine in college and he got himself one a few months ago. My sister gave us her wonderful desktop computer so H had a very happy afternoon of transferring files and info from the skids old desktop (and it was dinosaur old. because being the generous idiot that he is, H gave BM their computer when he left her!). H loves computer stuff and found his laptop (and one for my sister to replace the desktop) at a surplus sale at a college and fixed it up himself. He also got SS11 his own secondhand laptop for Christmas last year, so we are all decked out in private computers.

On a side note/vent about money and computers, BM broke the computer H gave her and bitched about not having one and being too poor to afford one blah, blah, blah to SS11 and whined to him about us being so rich that we all have laptops and a desktop for the boys and instead of paying her kids daycare (which she is currently in collections on) she bought herself a brand new laptop! This was before she lost her job and she was making over twice what we do, getting half the skids stuff paid for by us, AND getting a huge load of CS every month!! It makes me sick. For some reason, she thought H bought my laptop for me and I know she was jealous, but no, I bought it myself with my own hard earned money when I was in college. I didn't have kids with shoes from the dollar store and daycare fees to pay like she does. She seems to think that we are rolling in it and now that she actually IS broke, she is even worse than before. She applied to live at our HUD apartment complex (thank you, thank you God, for not letting her move in to my apartment building!!!!!) but was told that she makes way too much money to qualify to live here! Yeah, even with that she didn't get a clue and seems to think that we are rolling in the big money. Yes, we have a laptop for everybody, but that is because I bought mine back in the day with my own money and H bought his and SS11s for 100.00 each (plus about 200.00 for parts). They look old and clunky (except for mine) but they work really well, have lots of memory and are fast.

So anyway, back to my main point, I have my adorable little white mac notebook and he has his ugly, hulking Dell laptop (we have an on-running feud about macs versus pc's) and so it keeps everything separate. I would be a lot more cautious if we had a shared browser, but I would probably just set up a separate account on the same computer. Aside from that, he does know about this site, because I talk about it a little with him and he can see that it helps me and gives me insane comfort, so he's comfortable and supportive. I would feel weird having him read my posts though because although he knows how I feel about things, I know it's always hard for him to hear it (or read it) bluntly. He doesn't know my screen name, but honestly I am more concerned about BM finding my posts than him. It wouldn't be that big of a deal and I try to be as anonymous as I can be, but the last thing I want is more drama from her crazy ass.

I'm sure there are things H says and does that he wouldn't want me to witness and/or read and i'm fine with that. I know I drive him crazy sometimes and he has every right to vent about it (as long as he's not venting to BM! LOL!). Out of courtesy and my own feelings, I keep this site just for me, although I do mention funny stories from time to time...

"The truth shall set you free." ~John 8:32

One of the BM's in my life does stalk me on the internet and has recently asked that I stop posting things online, but I dont feel I have to give that up. This is my story, my views and my right to voice whatever I want in a manner that does not hurt a single person. I think the BMs only freak out because they read about themselves and don't like what they read. As far as my DH I dont go into detail about what i post or respond to, but he knows I post. He wouldn't know how to operate a computer if I sat the manuel next to it.

~~I am so unbelievably sick of your imperious bullsh!t. I never said I was June-f*cking-Clever~~

Hey invisible, I know the feeling exactly. Some of the same things that your DH's BM did to him, is the same things that's happened with my DH and his BM. My DH's BM has talked so much trash about my DH's family, her oldest son accused my DH of giving him bleach baths and it even went to trial but the charges were dismissed because he was lying, her cheating on him and from what I've heard, my MIL knew about it because BM was living with my DH and his mother during the time and no one said anything. The funny thing is my in laws let her live with them up until a couple of months ago! I don't try to fit in with my in laws because I wasn't raised the way were and I don't like the drama that they always have present. They think I'm stuck up but that's not true at all I just can't be myself around them because I don't agree with their lifestyle. I don't tell my DH about my posts on this site or anything because this is my private place.