Am i being unreasonable
Ok i will try to make this short... fathers day hubby got a big picture frame from skids with them doing their horse riding pictures in it.
1# the BM has obviously put this together for them to give to their dad so therefore i do not want something she has made up on my eeeffing wall in my house!
2# They only do the horse riding with the BM which is every weekend he has his custody times so therefore he still has to drop them off every sat and sun morning to the BM when it is suppose to be his weekend. It peeves me enough that he goes to the house to do it because he thinks he is doing it "for the kids" i say it just makes her life easier cos she doesnt have to go anywhere to collect them, she wants them why should he drop them off :?
3# These picture of the times they spend with their mother, it is not our life with them!
4# Hubby put the picture straight up on the wall the same day without consulting me.. it is my house too asshole
5# We have a daughter together yet i have yet to see him put up one picture! i had a nice one done on canvas which is still yet to go up.
6# i have pictures of me an my bio child that i paid a fortune for that i have not put up because that is not our family anymore, he even asked me why i had not put them up and he responded with "i am glad you feel that way"
He yelled at me because i got upset that he put the picture up, i explained all the above points to him but apparently i am a bitch and he wanted to put it up because he is proud of it. It was his fathers day present from his kids.. He doesnt believe that the mother would have done it on purpose knowing full well it would piss me off. He thinks she was just being nice for the kids.. Are Fathers so completely stupid??? I told him he has 3 kids now not just 2. And yet this is the only picture on our wall. We are redecorating and i do not want BM choice of frame and pictures in my house. Does that make me a bad person??? i honestly dont think so, IT IS MY HOUSE!!!!
Oh yeah the picture is still on the wall 3 weeks later and our babys picture is still in the drawers in our room!!!
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It's your job to get your Baby pictures on the wall
If you want the baby pictures on the wall. Put them right beside the other photos.
true
I could do that and was going to do that, but i will wreck the wall.. i had already considered this. I am not good at that stuff, and we have just painted so i dont want to stuff it up. Hubby is a builder, he would be better to do it! But the point is that BM made this picture, i would be happy to pull out 1 or 2 of the pictures and change the frame not have the enormous one on my wall that she had given him.
good point
Thanks laurenW.. you are right, i am not stupid enough to let her know that i dont like it because i know if she thinks i am ok with it it will piss her off, i am just more pissed at my husband for not even talking to me about it moreso because while were painting i had made a point of saying how i want to get certain pictures of the kids for the walls so they looked nice. but now because he put it up if i take it down it will upset the kids...
I dunno
Please don't bite my head off but I think it wasn't out of line. I understand your points and believe you are right about BM being involved but its important to him. I think sometimes you have to pick your battles and I think this is one of those times you should have just let him be happy to have something from the SKs. We don't like it when someone bursts our bubble when we are thrown a bone, we shouldn't do this with our DHs because of the same thing.
AND, don't hold back, put up those other pictures, your previous life's history is still part of who and what you are. It doesn't matter if it was before, during or after marriage to DH. You could arrange the pictures so that there is DH/SKs before you, you and BS before him and combined pictures of the "blended" family.
Hope it all works out. He probably totally forgot the picture deal after painting in his moment of pride. We are all guilty of that one time in or life or other.
Best of luck
We all smile in the same language
WHAT
i am in a very bad place right now, so i should probably be blogging then commenting..... but fuck all that shit...rip those horse pictures down and put you're stuff up --if there's room , put the other shit back up.........if not, it's your house!!!
1# the BM has obviously put
1# the BM has obviously put this together for them to give to their dad so therefore i do not want something she has made up on my eeeffing wall in my house!
-------------------> 1st Don't assume that BM is doing it just to get under your skin, if you always assume this, even if it *is* the case, you will always end up frustrated and angry. Also, If I were in this situation, I would have pics up of my biokids also, having pictures of all the kids on the wall, including stepkids is not that uncommon. If it would make you feel better, you could reframe it with a frame that you picked out. Tell DH that you would like to reframe it to go with the decor in your home.
2# They only do the horse riding with the BM which is every weekend he has his custody times so therefore he still has to drop them off every sat and sun morning to the BM when it is suppose to be his weekend. It peeves me enough that he goes to the house to do it because he thinks he is doing it "for the kids" i say it just makes her life easier cos she doesnt have to go anywhere to collect them, she wants them why should he drop them off
--------------------> Does it bother your DH that he has to drop them off? If not, then I doubt he will make a big fuss about it with BM. But I do agree, if she wants them on his time, she should be the one picking them up, and you guys can hug and kiss them goodbye inside, and send them outside to meet her in the driveway.
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“Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.”
I think you should just let it go
In our home we have SO MANY pictures on the walls, shelves, everywhere. Some of them are from when FH was with BM, some when I was with my ex, some taken while FH and I have been together. As long as there are no exes in the pics, what's wrong with it?
In the kids rooms, they have pics of their mom, and my son has a pic of him and his dad together. I can't erase the past, its there and those are their memories.
All that I ask is that in common areas no exes be displayed in any pics. And there aren't.
When I first got with FH I felt kinda like you. But sometimes we have to pick battles, KWIM?