confused/ venting
OK so this weekend SD is coming over and I'm excited but then i start thinking about it and start stressing about what she is going to do or say to me this weekend. I am living in fear of a five year old in my own home. The last time i saw her was OK but it was for short period of time. When we went to drop her off and MIL house me and MIL got into a argument because she slammed the car door next to my sleeping 5 month old screaming at me because i would not go inside her house cause I had an appointment to be at.FYI she will not come visit my daughter her GD at our house if she wants to see her she talks DH into driving 1 1/2 hours to her house with my daughter.Well getting to the point MIL is known to talk bad about people to SD and Then SD acts out towards those people. I have seen it first hand with SD and BM the MIL told SD that her mom was bad and that when SD was a baby and still in the care of BM she feed her peanut butter everyday so now she says that's why SD doesn't like Peanut butter. Keep in mind SD was about 1 when BM stopped caring for SD. I'm waiting to see what stories were told about me or things were said to make mine and SD relationship any worse oh and did i mention my DH doesn't have the guts/ B**** to stick up for me or even our Daughter
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A 5 yr old is going to
believe whatever MIL and BM tell her, thats the bad part....now, the good part is....LOL...and this takes a while, sooner or later she will work all the bs out for herself and know the truth...problem is...if yur DH doesn't stick up for u and biodaughter now, how will u EVER make it thru the teen years??....HE has to be the one to set the boundaries with BM and MIL...if he doesn't do that now....and yur SD drinks the "stepmom is evil" kool-aid....then its gonna be tough....it sounds like MIL is the one who is the problem here and its up to DH to put her in her place....I kept doing my thing, my way...I was loving, supportive, etc and eventually, my skids realized who was REALLY there for them....it CAN work, Kerrid, but in my opinion, it takes a strong DH to make it work
"You can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar"
Am wondering why MIL is allowed to do this
DH won't tell MIL that she can't see children if she's going to act like this? Is he afraid of her. Did she treat him like this as a child and he thinks it's normal? Does he need counseling? Also, it's unclear to me, does SD live with BM or MIL?
If I were DH, I think I would limit contact to MIL to only times when we are all there as a family when it will be harder for her to say anything and if she does, you can correct her.
"Evil Stepmothers aren't born, it comes with the territory"
I think they all need
I think they all need counseling!!! i starting to think if something isn't done soon im going to need it also. Unfortunately and sometime fortunately SD lives with MIL (more info about that in my post*any advice anyone*) mother is not currently in the picture. I do think his mom has treated him poorly his whole life nothing her does is ever good enough also nobody in his family will stick up for themselves to her it her way or no way.I was taught to stick up for yourself and especially your family so we don't get along.
My dh doesn't
doesn't stand up for me either, honey. I don't think he ever will. But he has no problem doing it for BD's. ugh.
"They say God doesn't give you more than you can handle. I just wish he didn't have so much confidence in me."