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I'm an idiot

nkbrown's picture

Submitted by nkbrown on Sat, 04/03/2010 - 12:32pm

After long long long discussions wit Dh and SD, I am still here. Now I am about to go meet and speak with BM.

But, SD sat down and told her dad that she needs more discipline and direction. She knows she has lied, stole, manipulation, and took advantage of her parents. She and I sat down and she told me just about everything I wanted to know -- truth hurts but it helps us now take some positive steps forward. SD wants help to grow up - her words.

I might be an idiot - but I'm still here.

Comments

Thetis's picture

Submitted by Thetis on Sat, 04/03/2010 - 1:12pm

You mean everyone thinks you're an idiot right?

Its great to have someone tell you everything you thought was right and that you were on the right track! Now good luck getting Dh to join you.

sm27's picture

Submitted by sm27 on Sat, 04/03/2010 - 4:22pm

I don't think you're an idiot, I think you give people the benefit of the doubt, and you have hope for people and that's great!!! I wish I had a sm like you Wink

nkbrown's picture

Submitted by nkbrown on Sat, 04/03/2010 - 5:53pm

Thanks.

The meeting with BM went no way like I thought it would. She was actually nice and asking me what she could do to help me - help her daughter. Ok I get it. The parents don't know what to do. Both have told me to take charge and they will give me full support. The only one still outside is the BGM.

Now it gets interesting. SD sat and told her mother that she knows she needs to change and what she plans to do. She also told both her parents that to be a good parent to her child she has to grown up -- but doesn't know how, but she wants to learn.

SD then said she wants to have joint custody of her child with her father and me. SD wants to raise her baby but admitted she didn't realize what all it would take.

So yes this is getting interesting. We went and got job applications. Then sat down and I explained how home finances worked. She looked at me and said "Ya'll really have to plan this way? I never knew." She actually believed that when her parents told her they couldn't afford something they were just being mean.

I hope she is not trying to manipulate again, because I told her there is only two choices. Follow the rules or move out. No other option allowed. And both parents agreed.

Time will tell...........

nkbrown's picture

Submitted by nkbrown on Sun, 04/04/2010 - 8:48am

I'm already cautious. I told DH that I won't be on the custody agreement. Lawyer recommended a guardianship for DH instead.

I know that SD is going to say what she expects people want to hear. I hope for the best but expect the worse.