Speech Impediments: normal at these ages?
Out of all my skids, the only one who speaks normally is the eldest, SS9. His younger brother, SS8, still struggles with pronouncing his Rs ... to the point of being teased by his peers. Likewise, the two youngest (SD6 and SS5) cannot pronounce Rs or THs; for example, "thirsty" is pronounced "fiwsty". All 3 are supposedly receiving speech therapy in school, but DH and I haven't seen any improvement and he says that BM is dismissive and disinterested when the topic is broached.
Admittedly, I don't have tons of experience in this area, but from what I've heard these speech impediments can become a real problem if still present after age 5 ... harder to correct, perhaps? I am especially worried about SS8 and SS5; there are times when I literally cannot understand one word they're saying out of a full sentence.
Also, from a selfish perspective, the incorrect pronunciation kind of drives me nuts; like if one of them says "I'm fiwsty," I am sorely tempted to reply "Sorry honey, I don't know what 'fiwsty' is. Try again." It's just not cute after a certain age. Well, I guess I should be thankful that none of them lisp! Hahaha, hearing "fiwthsty" would REALLY send me over the edge. 
Is this normal? Should I be worried, or will they just "grow out of it" on their own?
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Only one suggestion that
Only one suggestion that first came to mind when I read your blog, get this checked out by a good dentist. Forget the name of it but its the flap of skin under their tongue that could be too tight or to lose. Schools overlook it and it was the case for one child I later learned. Not saying your Skids for sure have it and its possibly hereditary however its worth ruling out if nothing else.
Excellent suggestion! I will
Excellent suggestion! I will mention that to DH and let him run with it. Thanks!!
I don't remember the medical
I don't remember the medical term for it, but the slang term is tongue tied. SOs son had this problem and the doctor had to cut the flap of skin under this tongue. According to SO, once this surgery was done, his son was able to speak without an impediment. SOs 17 year old daughter has a slight lisp. He said when his daughter was real little it was much more predominate. These issues could be hereditary.
My daughter still had trouble
My daughter still had trouble with S sounds at that age. "suit" was "shoot." Speech therapy at school helped her tremendously. DH should talk to the therapist directly to make sure they actually ARE receiving therapy and to find out if there is anything he can reinforce at home.
I have asked DH about him
I have asked DH about him speaking directly to the kids' teachers, speech therapists, etc. rather than taking BM's word on things, as she is a notorious liar. However, since he is not the "primary custodian," these people are not legally obligated to discuss anything with him! He has repeatedly asked the kids' teachers to copy him on email correspondence with the BM to stay informed of what's going on, but they never comply because of this so-called "rule." I'm baffled by it; he's their FATHER, after all, right?? But, it's definitely worth another try. Thanks!
What a tremendous idea!
What a tremendous idea! Barring any physical deformity, I agree that laziness is likely involved here. When I or DH "force" them to pronounce the Rs or THs correctly, they do; albeit there is some effort involved, but ... bad habits DO take hard work and persistence to break! It just becomes damned exhausting hounding 3 out of 4 kids about it constantly. Sometimes it WEALLY bugs me and I simply have to speak up, while other times I say to myself "Pick your battles, for your own sanity" and just ignore it.
That all being said, incenting them and using positive/negative reinforcement could work. We could easily identify something that each of them want and dangle it like a carrot until the desired behavior is accomplished.
One forseeable challenge is the oldest who speaks correctly and doesn't need improvement in this area. No doubt he will feel left out if he doesn't get a chance to "earn" a treat like the rest of his sibs.
Question ... does Saige stay at your house only, or is SD allowed to bring her home to BM's house between visits? Just curious.
Aww, that's awesome! Good for
Aww, that's awesome! Good for the both of you!!
I totally understand keeping Saige at your house. Like you said, those dolls are beaucoup bucks! DH and I also make the kids keep anything that we've bought them here at our house. This includes toys, clothes, and gifts that our friends/family buy for them (unless the toys are noisy or annoying, then the kids have permission to take them home to BM's house - lol). We learned early on that sending the kids home with what I consider "our" stuff only leads to frustration; like you said, we never see said items again and if you ask BM about it, she conveniently "forgets" where they are.
Love the chore idea - that's perfect for SS9! Of course the "rewards" we select will have to be on a smaller scale, since there are 4 of them and money's a bit tight right now, but hopefully they will be appropriately motivated (and grateful) nonetheless. Thanks so much for the suggestions! I will let you know how we fare.
Hi god671 - No, I don't think
Hi god671 - No, I don't think they offer IEPs in their school district. I am positive that their lazy-ass BM is not doing anything with them herself. Then again, I guess you could call me and DH "lazy-asses" too since we don't usually correct them. IMHO, the bulk of this responsibility should fall on the BM ... SHE insisted (and of course got) primary custody, SHE is the one collecting a butt-load of CS each month (much of which she squanders on herself and her dim-witted husband), therefore SHE is the one responsible for establishing and reinforcing their day-to-day development. Realistically, we only have them EOWE so there is only so much impact we can have; any slight improvement they might make is erased once they go home. But there are a few suggestions from other posters that I'd like to try, so ... we shall see!
Practice with them. I do
Practice with them. I do this with SD6. If they CAN pronounce it when you practice with them, then it's not a tongue-tie issue. Some are lazy, some like to pretend they are still babies, and some are products of maternal drug/alcoholism. I herd a huge discussion on this on NPR- they will appoint guardians for fetuses so that they are protected from maternal neglect in the womb, because it costs the medical system too much to bring them all up to speed once they are damaged. It is a well known fact that my SDs mother did all kinds of junk during her pregnancy, and I actually feel bad for the kids, and their little mouths are trying to fight against prior neglect...
BadNanny - Good point! DH
BadNanny - Good point! DH told me that the two youngest were both born premature and, according to the NICU nurses, both exhibited signs of severe codeine withdrawal. Who knows what kind of permanent effect that has had on their brains and bodies?