Before I just start ranting, let me give just a background story.

I am 29 with no kids. My SO and I have been together for almost 3 years now. He has a daughter who is 12. It's your typical teen pregnancy story. He got his girlfriend pregnant in high school. They ended up splitting before their daughter turned 1 so that's what she's always known. Aside from a semi broken family, the good thing has been the normality and consistency of their custody and living situation. In my eyes, SD12 is very fortunate. Her mom married when she was young and her SF has been in her life for almost 10 years. She has 2 younger brothers from them. On my SO's side, it's been as normal as it can be. He only had his daughter part time, if not less. Being so young he did still live at home with his parents so he had a lot of support from them, A LOT.
Relevant or not, his parents are pretty wealthy so they did damn near pay for everything. And this being their first grandchild from their youngest son you can only imagine. He went out of state for college so he only came home a few times a month to see his daughter. He did have other relationships but never serious to the point where him and his daughter moved in with someone until she was maybe 6. This woman was awful. They got married and moved in together. She had a daughter who was I think 3 years younger than his. A "blended family" is what I think it's called. Basically NO ONE liked her. His family, his daughter or her mother or his friends. I know that whole situation traumatized his daughter a little. Well traumatized might be a little exaggerating but you know what I mean. They ended up getting divorced after 3ish - 4 years.  

Before we decided to be "official" (how high shchool am I? haha) I knew he had a daughter and most of the background story. Was I scared? YEAH. I was scared because this would be my first time being involved with someone who has a child. I wasnt really sure wtf I was getting myself into. But who does? I took the chance becuase I really liked him. Obviously. I didnt mind that he was a dad. I actually respected the fact that he was involved with his childs life and that he had a civil to normal relationship with her mother. I'd be lying if I said we took things slow. We didnt. And that was on us both and thats where I think things went wrong. Not wrong but I think thats one thing we shouldve done differently. 

At the time, my sister was living with me, well barely living with me. She had her own thing going on. So it was pretty much just me and my 3 fur demon babies. I had just gotten out of a 4 year relationship maybe 6 or so months prior to the start of us. I wasnt looking for a relationship. I honestly thought after that relationship I was going to be single forever. Haha but anyways, he would stay the nights with me on some days. And we just did our thing. I knew I wasnt ready to really meet his daughter but there were points that I felt obligated. And this is my own fault. So finally made the decision that I would meet her as dad's "friend." He told her I had dogs etc.. So it was around her birthday and me being me, i went out and bought her a pretty nice gift. The same kind of gift I would really buy my friends kids or whatever. He brought her to my house so she could meet the dogs. I gave her the gift and we just played with the dogs for a bit. They left and that was that. Ocassionally we would all go out to gameworks or take her to claires. She would always ask if we could have sleepovers and the answer was always no. My sister somewhere in the middle moved out. SO continued to stay over more and more and eventually he just never left. During the weekends when he would have his daughter he would stay with her at his parents. Thats were they were living when him and his ex wife split. and during the week he would come back "home." It was odd for a while but it worked out. I eventually met his family and it started getting more serious. I wish I could say there was more time in between before she moved in with us. I honestly dont remember how long after I met her that she moved in. I know it wasnt enough time but it happened any way. She was so excited. I guess before she moved in, I was too. Still scared but excited for something new. And I was pretty sure that SO and I were just meant to be. Before she moved in, I requested I meet her mother and that her mother approve of the new arrangement. This was MY choice and quiet honest, I was almost
concerned that neither of her parents had suggested this when I even first met his daughter. I always try to put myself in the others persons shoes and flip the situation. what if this were MY child? I would definitely want to know who my child is meeting and where they are staying. PLUS, I knew there was bad blood between her mother and SO's ex when they were together so I definitely did not to experience that. Needless to say it worked out. Us 4 adults are pretty civil and luckily there is no drama. We have her on the weekends and holidays every other year. SO and her mother are pretty good with coparenting. If he wants her an extra day, they work it out and vice versa. 

So here we are now a couple years later...

....to be continued.