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Watching results of lazy parenting

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Submitted by Hastings on Fri, 04/26/2024 - 9:50am

Sometimes I feel like Cassandra or Chicken Little, over here seeing warning signs that no one else can (or will).

For as long as I've known him, SS13 has been sneaky. He lies. He gets upset when he doesn't get his way. He's not rotten or malicious, but he's 100% self-centered and thoughtless.

As I blogged before, I'm disengaging from everything that doesn't directly impact me, my property or my dogs. Better for my marriage and my stress.

Now we have attitude at school

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Submitted by Hastings on Wed, 04/24/2024 - 4:31pm

SS13's attitude has been much worse lately. Monosyllabic answers. Rolling eyes. Scoffing and "what are you, stupid?" tone. Not unusual for pubescent kids, but annoying and not excused.

Today, DH got an email from one of SS's teachers to tell him he's becoming a real problem: talking, acting up, arguing back. When she corrects him or moves his seat, he rolls his eyes or scoffs at her.

Disappointment and Crying — anyone else deal with this?

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Submitted by Hastings on Mon, 04/22/2024 - 9:22am

SS13 really struggles with managing disappointment. He cries. Or at least turns red, stone-faced and wells up.

For example, we generally all watch TV in the evening. We get some streaming services for free through our cell provider and then will rotate through other paid ones. When we've watched everything we want to watch, we'll drop it and pick up another one. That way we're not paying for a dozen channels we're not watching.

Pros and cons: electronics edition

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Submitted by Hastings on Mon, 04/15/2024 - 9:35am

One of the rules at our house is "no electronics at bedtime." SS13 puts his various gadgets in the hall and DH puts them away for the night, then puts them back out when he gets up in the morning. There have been instances of SS holding onto one, lying about whether or not he brought it to our house -- or just neglecting to put one out to see if DH notices.

Disengagement: A Question

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Submitted by Hastings on Tue, 04/09/2024 - 1:22pm

For my own sanity and stress level, I'm working on not caring regarding SS13. In other words, if it's an issue that doesn't directly impact me, my property or the dogs, I'm going to stop caring or worrying about it. Just let go and let the parents deal with it (or not -- as will probably be the case). I feel like I've been caring too much and getting too anxious about certain things, but that just leads to frustration as there's not much I can do.

Smells and clothes again… some more

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Submitted by Hastings on Mon, 04/08/2024 - 9:22am

After a pleasant week off, SS13 came back over yesterday. As usual, the unbearable stench hit us when he got in the car. (He always comes over from BM's absolutely reeking of pet-related smells. It's not BO.) DH had to open the sunroof and roll down windows until we got home. When we arrived home, DH told him to go up and shower and to bring his clothes down to the washer. He got the bag of sports uniforms and dumped them straight in there as well.

I go on prepping lunch. Eventually, SS comes down -- wearing the same tracksuit he was wearing before.

Eggs — not a huge deal, but need to vent

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Submitted by Hastings on Fri, 03/29/2024 - 9:04am

It's an SS13 week -- more than half over, thank goodness. He's never been the most pleasant kid, but now we have teen attitude. He ignores my existence, so none of it is aimed at me, but it drives DH crazy.

Anyway, SS has gotten into a pattern of making himself scrambled eggs every morning before catching the bus. Fine. Good that he's learned to make something for himself.

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