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Just need to get this off my chest

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Submitted by Elizabeth on Fri, 06/20/2014 - 9:34am

DH's mother has been sick for quite some time. We were on vacation halfway across the country when we got a call at 3:30 am on a Friday that she wasn't expected to last eight hours. DH changed his flight to go back, but with the way airlines are overbooked he wasn't able to get back until about 11 pm Friday. Meanwhile, he told SD21 about her grandmother and SD was driving down (5.5 hours) to see her.

SD21 wants to be babied forever, and she can't use logic

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Submitted by Elizabeth on Wed, 05/21/2014 - 1:45pm

OK, so SD21 has now completed three years of what should be a four-year college program but is more likely to be five or more. She has lived in the dorms the entire three years, including the summer, even though her college is in the same town where both BM and BM's mom live. We pay 1/3 of her college, BM is ordered to pay 1/3 and SD21 is responsible for the remainder. DH pays more than 1/3, probably closer to 2/5 or maybe even 1/2.

DH falls back on ignorant

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Submitted by Elizabeth on Tue, 05/20/2014 - 9:16am

So DH brought up SD21 this weekend. I have told him I will no longer discuss this subject with him because it inevitably ends up in a fight. He doesn't want my advice on the topic, he has made that clear to me, so I don't care to hear him vent.

So SD21 told MIL that it is DH's fault that MIL is sick because DH doesn't take good enough care of her/go see her enough.

My MIL is more awesome than your MIL

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Submitted by Elizabeth on Wed, 05/14/2014 - 1:47pm

And SD21 is a fool.

MIL is sick and in the hospital, but she's been ill for as long as I've known here (15 years), so this is not an unusual occurrence and she is not at death's door. Well, DH and I go see her regularly (about every other month or every six weeks) and we have been to the hospital to visit her, then the nursing home where she was staying, now back to the hospital. We visited her on Mother's Day.

OMG, if I cared enough I would be seeing red

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Submitted by Elizabeth on Mon, 04/21/2014 - 10:00am

So I hear DH on the phone yesterday with somebody and I can tell they are chastising him, and he's being all apologetic. He is NOT like that. So I listen closer, somehow is chastising him about his mother being ill (in the hospital) and him not going to see her. We have talked about going to see her several times, but every time he calls she says she's not up for visitors, and we don't want to stress her out.

OT: When an apology is not an apology

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Submitted by Elizabeth on Thu, 04/17/2014 - 2:13pm

This is not about SD21 because I am now 100% disengaged with her.

This is just about DH, who I more and more think was the source of our problems.

So, DH is a hypocrite. He likes to pull all this passive/aggressive crap and I'm just supposed to take it and smile but when I call him on it, I'm a bit#h. Make sense?

Is there any proper way to respond to asinine questions?

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Submitted by Elizabeth on Tue, 04/01/2014 - 11:59am

Some of the posts on here have me flashing back to when SD (now 21) still lived with us and all the sh*t I had to put up with. Below are my three favorites. In any case, no matter what I said, it was the "wrong" thing, according to DH. I think the only thing that would have made him happy was for me to drop what I was doing and have a frank, thoughful and thorough discussion with SD on every occasion. Sorry buddy, not happening!

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