Catlover's Blog
It's my favorite time of year...school registration!
I seriously dread it every year, since we have 50/50 it becomes a total mess! DH tries to contact BM to figure out who's registering who, and never hears back from her. In a perfect world we would take care of registering (and costs associated with) SS since we claim him on taxes and BM claims SD. DH usually leaves her a "I'm headed to registration on xyz...if I don't hear back from you, I'm going to register both kids and let you know the $$$ you owe for half" Of course we hear nothing from her.
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BM's lawyer threatens DH with harassment restraining order over......nothing?
After the second time DH found out that BM and her fiance were taking the skids to accident scenes during their time on call as volunteer firefighters, he notified BM via email that he would not tolerate this in the future. So once again the skids tell us that BM and fiance had left the skids alone (they are 9 and 11) at the firehouse so they could go on "a call." So Dh went in and (very calmly) told the fire chief that he did not feel it was appropriate for our kids to be exposed to accident scenes or left unattended at the fire house.
BM's getting married next month! Here comes the drama!
BM is getting married next month and frankly I am thrilled. I only hope and pray she dumps my last name and takes her new guys! The funny thing is up to this point DH and I had heard nothing about it and seeing as we have 50/50 placement, you'd think she'd want to get things organized early. Last night we finally get an email demanding extra days next month for her schedule with us being the taxis.
Why is it the BMs who LEFT our DH's now demand DH do everything WITH them
My DH's Ex (like many of yours) was the one who bailed on DH. (she thought the grass was greener with her partner at work). Yet I find it very odd that she is obsessed over DH doing every skid activity WITH her! DH and I (we have 50/50 placement) have petitioned the court for a set placement schedule to eliminate BM essentially telling DH when she was taking the kids each month. Our goal is to have this all set in an effort to decrease the frequency of contact with her. Previously DH and BM would every month have to "sit down" to debate that month's schedule. Enough of that!
Follow up on BM taking skids on emergency medical calls with her
Three times in the past year BM and her fiance have taken the skids (11 and 9) on to accident scenes (they are volunteer firefighters). DH has repeatedly told her that is unacceptable. Yesterday SD told us that BM's Fiance had left her at the firehouse (alone and unsupervised) while he ran out on an emergency call. Keep in mind this is not their paying jobs (they are also emts), rather a volunteer position, and they don't HAVE to leave on these "calls". DH went to the firestation this morning and spoke to the fire chief. He was very nice, but essentially told him this needs to stop.
DH has decided that I am the problem VENT ...long
DH and I have had two weeks of nonstop tension and fighting. It has seriously made me question our relationship for the first time in three years. The major source of our tension is...you guessed it..the skids. They are off of school and enrolled in every single activity under the sun. DH has been working crazy hours the last two weeks (think 70 hour work weeks, gone for two or three days at a time)...this leaves me to take care of our 1yr old AND be the chauffer,cook, entertainment committee etc for the skids (they are with us 50/50).
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For those of you w/ Bio kids w your SO is balance possible?
I find myself angry and saddened that BD (1) is growing up in an environment filled with chaos and drama; all of it filtering in from skids/bm. I see all the crappy behavioral issues the skids are bringing into our home (compliments of BM) and I worry that BD will pick up on these things. I know raising kids is difficult enough, but to have BM even slightly impacting my daughters life just ticks me off to no end. I grow tired of having MIL spoiling skids because their parents divorced. DH believes that all three kids should be treated equally....and I agree...to a point.
Kicked in the teeth by ss again...so angry
when oh when will I learn? SS came home from school and informed us that he needs to take a food for a school project to school on Monday. How nice, he's had this project (which he has been working w/BM on) for over a month, and now tells us that we have to bake 48 scones (to represent Scotland)for Monday. I ask him if he needs someone (me) to bring them to school, or if parents are invited. He says no, that he'll take them with him to school on Mon.
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let the PAS begin!
DH and I have made a point to be the "better" people, being supportive of their relationship with BM, not involving them in the battles w/ her, not ripping on BM to the skids, not pointing out the ridiculous lies that the skids are being told...but you know what....taking the high road sucks! I've noted that over the last 6 months the skids and SD11 in particular have become a walking talking bombing squad on DH and I and most of it coming directly from BM.
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Ever feel like you are the only rational one?
Sometimes I feel like DH likes to dig his heels in and fight for the sake of fighting w/BM. Yes, she's a nutjob, but at times I wish he could just let some of this crap go. He gets into his control freak tendencies and wants to P**s off BM, then she does the same. At times I feel like I am the only adult in this situation. For example, it comes time to sign the skids up for swimming lessons..... DH signs them up for the early morning session...why??? because he knows that BM can't get her butt out of bed before noon on a good day. (skids are w/ us 50/50).
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