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Attack step-parenting

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Submitted by gertrude on Mon, 08/04/2008 - 2:33pm

I think I attack step-parented the other day. Probably did. (Dealing with SD through spouse in an assertive, but perhaps not thoughtful manner...)

My SD totally played me, and I recognize it now, but she really did get me. The funny thing is, even though she manipulated me, I responded in such a way that DH is paying. She announced that she needed a changing table for the little one, and she was going to go buy a cheap one with the "little bit of money" she had saved.

So now she is enrolled

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Submitted by gertrude on Mon, 07/28/2008 - 11:14am

We had the "chat" this weekend. Interestingly, DH and I are, at the moment, on the same page. I asked SD what was going on, what was all the feet dragging about - and she said she wanted to move back down with Protoplasm.

What does Family mean?

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Submitted by gertrude on Thu, 04/17/2008 - 4:06pm

I read Mommy2's forum today, and started thinking - what does family mean? I know I understand the feeling of being all alone, sitting on my couch with my DH on one side, my grand daughter on the floor, and my SD sitting next to DH. And, I am alone... that doesn't feel like family.

A few months back, my DH explained to me, "that is not how the (insert DH's family name here) does things!" (um, wait, I thought I was part of that family?)

How about THEM cookies?

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Submitted by gertrude on Tue, 04/01/2008 - 3:28pm

(YIPPEE) ok, I don't usually post this often, but it was mighty fine last night, and I wanted to put up a tale of success...

(Picture it)
Dinner time.
Dh
SD
GrandDaughter in high chair learning to bang and sing...
Plates are somewhat clean.

DH leans back, "ok, now we have to talk."

SD - Patentable deer in head lights look. ooohhh poor me? I didn't do nothing, remember I am the victim here look. Really, it is a good look, I want to gag.

Saying no

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Submitted by gertrude on Mon, 03/31/2008 - 1:33pm

But reframing it. It hasn’t been a picnic, but this weekend, I actually felt like something happened. I said no. And, I reframed the no into not “me denying her” but her making a choice. We are starting to get the “baby” excuse for having things the way she wants them. It reminded me of some posts about “I’ll be out in the cold”.

Not really a step issue, but feedback is appreciated

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Submitted by gertrude on Fri, 03/07/2008 - 11:01am

OK - Maybe it is a boundaries issue, I am not really sure. But - I just got a call from my SD's girl friend, who spends a lot of time at our house. In fact - she does more chores than my SD. I've been around and around with both SD and DH on constant issues around this. I like this young lady. She seems to be facing the right way with her feet on the ground. HOWEVER, she is NOT a part of the family, she is NOT allowed to sleep over (no sleep overs allowed for SD under any circumstances).

Grumpy, grumpy, grumpy (RANT)

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Submitted by gertrude on Mon, 10/15/2007 - 12:45pm

I am SO grumpy today, my SD left to visit the "other" grandparents with her little newborn daughter last Thursday. I was really looking forward to it! I know it is horrible, but my house had become a place of personal dread. Ever since baby arrived, SD has been rude, whiney, and LAZY!! DH has been totally supportive of - well - you guessed it - SD. It had been getting on my last nerve. I've been trying to keep communication lines open, but it has been a little weird. DH went marching through the house last week announcing that SD was the best mom on the face of the planet. (WHAT???

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