Ok, I know i've vented and talked about this before. BUT, I am determined now. THere will be NO more SD at my house on his wknds...at least for a long time until I'm over this or I KNOW she's shaped up.

I"m stressed because finances are super short right now, I have 3 baby showers this month, was my sons bday and I couldn't even do a big party. He's having to wait till Wednesday for his gift and being a trooper about it.

I talked to the boys about finances, about the importance of paying bills, of buckling when things are tight and I was so suprised by how maturely this 10yr old handled it!!!

I had family over for dinner and his best friend came for a sleepover. Bf's and his BD came..and man what a trip..she's just rude, ungrateful, insults and bothers the shit out of the boys in THEIR home, has stopped saying bye when she leaves, mopes around complaining about the movie I got, that I have rules she doesn't like-like NO you aren't going to play tag in the toyroom at 11 at night when i'm trying to get kids settled for bed. My oldest is sick, I'm sick, I just hosted dinner at my house for my son-I"m ready for bed. You think she cared I wasn't feeling good? NOPE. Just bitched about how boring and unfair everyone was...called the boys lazy, stupid, because they don't jump to play outside w/her when she wants them to...WHO wants to play w/her anyway-she's a brat and mean and a bully...of course they aren't going to jump when you say when!!

SHe complains about everything, always bored, always griping...this is MY HOUSE...I will not hear it anymore. I want my wknds w/my kids to be good ones, they don't want her here. We are not married or living together so there's no reason I have to put up w/her visiting.

Friday night bf and I had a fight (probably stress induced from this maybe his monster kid)-I had two panic attacks, slept 4 hrs that night..and STILL made dinner for us for sons bday on Saturday. Rented a movie...bf and D were going home since my sons friend was spending the night-that didn't stop her from complaining about the STUPID Movie I got-try to entice the boys to "play" (roughhouse) throught the whole movie and then when it was over...I'm feeling like death and want to all settled and them to leave and she throws an attitude about how my rules are unfair and suck.

Today I had my friends baby shower, helped her set up, get the cake, clean up...I come home after picking my kids up from my folks-I"m tired, this allergy has turned into sinus/bronchitis and feel awful and exhausted.

For some idiotic reason bf things it's cool to come by for an hr w/her hoping the girl neighbors were outside playing b4 he takes her home. THey (girls) were but obviously didn't want to play w/her-ha! SO she comes in tries to prank the boys, name calls, just aggravates them, makes fun of them-usual mean self. He was only here 30min. After the first ten minutes he says this was a bad idea...I said YEP...maybe time for her to go home. (she didn't hear this).

I'm laying on the couch feeling half dead-she comes in from the toyroom bitching about the boys and being insulting about how bored she is...then leaves to wait outside for dad...never said bye, thanks for having me, thanks for dinner at the party.

OH...and get this I had cupcakes-she pitched a fit because she couldn't pick the first cupcake-NO-it's my sons' bday HE picks first. When she had her bday and I picked her up cupcakes-SHE insisted on eating all the choclate ones, didn't share any of those and took most of them home.

I'm pretty fed up w/her selfishness, bullying, attitude, rudeness, ill-mannered, ungrateful self. THis is not my mess-and I'm doing this not even knowing if this kid is truly my bf's?? HELL NO! To have a mini version of his crazy exwife in my living room insulting our home and my kids and the rules? While I open my home, let you use my makeup, take you places, feed you? Well-if I were married I"m stuck w/it but I'm not so I don't have to anymore.

It's coming up allright-let the card fall where they may, but my wknds w/the kids are OURS...she can visit w/dad at his place from here on out. NOT my problem. I will not be aggravated, insulted and disrespected in my own home, and neither will my children.

VENT OVER...shit I have so much more but I've got to stop for a minute.