Should I do it?
I know this seems extremely immature but I am feeling a little crazy today..
Usually BM and GBM wish me a happy birthday (March) and MD. I don't know if they really appreciate me as mother figure, but they usually text me nonetheless.
When I ignored BM's request to pick SD's phone up the week before my bday after she was an ass to me about it the week before that, neither of them wished me a happy bday this year. They usually do. We ran into GBM and her husband on Easter and she said she had a gift for me. That was a lie lol this is where BM's fakeness and insincerity come from.
Anyway, I was shopping for MD cards for my mom, SM, and aunt. SD already has a card for BM that GBM helped her get. Then I had an idea- should I be the "bigger person" (read asshole) and message them on Sunday about how wonderful they are? Like I said, immature but idgaf anymore.
DH did the dishes and made hamburger helper last night, btw. I stayed out with my aunt playing pool until 10pm.
ETA I do NOT expect any praise from neither BM nor GBM, but we play "nice" for SD's sake. Well, until the cell phone incident, that is..
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No, you shouldn't.
No, you shouldn't.
Then I had an idea- should I
God, no. Absolutely not, and here’s why:
While YOU might think you’re one-upping them with a fake sugarcoated message (aka: being a backhanded a-hole) - they are most likely not going to take it that way. To them, it’s just another success in getting you to engage with them - even after they blatantly ignored you.
It’s an emotionally manipulative game they’re playing with you. It’s SO textbook. It would be absolutely foolish to engage at this point. This isn’t going to make you look like the “bigger person”, no matter how much you don’t GAF.
Disengage.
IGNORE IGNORE IGNORE!
IGNORE IGNORE IGNORE!
They feed off of contact. Even negative contact. THAT is what they want. If they do not have an audience they will go away. Who cares if they wish you a HB or happy MD. Really, at the end of the day are you heartbroken over that?
I would NEVER wish our HCBM anything but a quick nod and a 'go to hell' in my head! And I am sure she feels the same about me.
NO. Drop them like a hot rock
NO. Drop them like a hot rock. Now is the time to begin your disengagement from them.
ETA I do NOT expect any
But, their niceties ebb and flow like the sea. Why you even bother with these people is beyond me.
Next week it will be something else, when it’s comes to BM pitching a fit.
While I realize this is a joke to you, to engage with them, you need to save your reserves for people who truly deserve it. And it’s not them.
I didn't think about it being
I didn't think about it being negative contact. Or them having an audience as to how "great" they are. I was just being silly. I don't really care to give them any attention. You all are right, they don't take care for my (nonexistent) child and have never done SD any favors by coddling her or keeping her away the first few years I was in the picture. Thank you for bringing me back to reality.
I'll let DH fawn over them lol his real MD well wishes to them should read like this:
To BM: thanks for cheating on me and emotionally abusing me for 5 years. Thanks for withholding SD when I met Dogs and being jealous that she is more young and beautiful than you are. And a SPECIAL thanks for villianizing me in court and barely giving me 30 hours a month to see our daughter. Oh yeah, and THANK YOU for not being a mom for the 7 years you kept SD from me and now expect me to fix her with the 50% I have and still receiving $450/ month in CS! The world is a better place with you in it!
To GBM: thanks for supporting your daughter's alienation against me in court then expecting me to play nice after the fact. Thanks for buying all of SD's clothes because you feel obligated because your loser daughter is an underachiever. Thank you for never disciplining BM and creating a self absorbed, narcissistic twat of a woman. Thank you so much!
SD already has a card for BM
Good. Glad it wasn’t your DH, because you (general “you”) would be hard pressed to find a Mother’s Day card that **doesn't** include the usual Hallmark verbiage “loving” and “supportive” and “understanding”.
I couldn't, in good faith, have anything to do with handing a card over to a BM/GBM/or even a MIL (like mine) who has been nothing but absolutely nasty throughout the rest of the year.
He will usually help SD pick
He will usually help SD pick something out out of the goodness of his heart and what he thinks is the "right thing to do" but I agree, I do not approve of praising nasty BMs who did nothing but prove that they have the ability to create a healthy child.
Nope, nay, no way Jose.
Nope, nay, no way Jose.
No.... if you REALLY want to
No.... if you REALLY want to be an a$$hole, make a post on social media with pics of you and SD and SO and go all SUPER cheesy about how AWESOME they made you feel... that even if you're not the mama, you SURE FEEL LOVED LIKE IT! Go all out... sugar coat the sh!t out of that post... then tag BM and GBM and say "Hope you have as good a mother's day as I've been treated to!! Happy Mother's Day!"
I love this! But neither use
I love this! But neither use social media. BM has never had many friends, surprise surprise, but she lost them all except her co-workers after she cheated on DH. He is a great guy and no one supported her ho-ing lol
Yeah, BM here doesn’t have
Yeah, BM here doesn’t have many friends as well. They can tolerate only so much of her BS.
When DH tells me about shady
When DH tells me about shady stuff BM does then turns around and plays nicey nice, I just say "well, it must be hard wearing 2 faces".
OMG - yes!
OMG - yes!
Except, I wouldn’t tag BM or GBM. I would let them stumble upon it themselves, or be told about the Facebook photo post by another person. Then, once BM and/or GBM come unhinged, and try to throw the weight of their uteruses around, I’d go radio silent and NOT respond. Ahhh... hahahaha.
Thank you, ladies, for being
Thank you, ladies, for being my voice of reason! The last thing these GUBMs need is another person worshipping them for simply having children.
I really am a nice person and would love for everyone to be cordial but I just need to accept that it will never be that way given the recent incidents.