Major hygiene issues, or am I just OTT?
I feel relatively lucky that various issues I have raised with my OH have been met with positivity and a willingness to change, particularly when it comes to behaviour issues. When he and his two young kids moved in with me I saw some pretty bad behaviour and my OH would just shrug it off. Now we deal with things much more proactively and for the most part it works.
However recently I have become really preoccupied with the lack of hygiene in the house. I was raised to believe in regular hand washing and having a really good sense of hygiene. I've always noticed the kids aren't asked to wash their hands or whatever but I don't know how important that is, especially with all the other issues we have to deal with? But today I saw SS5 wipe his nose with his sleeve....and then LICK it off. It was literally stomach churning. Is this acceptable?
Anyway, I need a way to approach this with OH. I don't want to hurt his feelings, or tell him how to raise his kids, the thing is, when my OH wipes his kids' bums then comes downstairs to cuddle me, I KNOW he hasn't washed HIS hands either...
Do I really have to tell my OH that he needs to wash his own hands? Or get his kids to do it? Or do I just let it slide? I am constantly raising issues that are directed at the kids, so if I now start telling my OH how to look after himself properly, am I crossing a line?
Wow, thanks. Sorry to hear
Wow, thanks. Sorry to hear you got so ill, that's terrible.
Now that you mention it, the kids are literally always unwell. Could poor hygiene be a factor? Maybe if I say to my OH that I think we need to step up hygiene in the house to try to minimise illnesses. Rather than direct it at him, I could say, 'maybe if we ensure we always wash our hands after going to the bathroom and helping the kids when they go' and see what he says.
If I get evasiveness I'm totally raising the e-coli issue.
Haha it really is isn't it?
Haha it really is isn't it? Sometimes I think I must just be crazy but it's good to know it here a recognise that it isn't right.
I think I will just ask him tonight and tell him it makes me uncomfortable and that I expect bette standards of hygiene all round.
The worst thing is he wants the eldest to become involved in making food in the house. But does hand washing become part of the package? I seriously hope so. When I see something that grosses me out I literally think of my childhood, being at my childminder's house and being put on step so I could reach the sink and wash my hands. the smell of the soap was lovely! I wish these kids could be taught that washing hands is an expected behaviour.
Ugh. My skids are not good
Ugh. My skids are not good about this. I am frustrated that at almost 9, I still have to have them go back and wash their hands after they go to the bathroom or before eating. Grosses me out that they are going around touching everything in the house. I know their mom is a clean freak so I don't know where they get it. Would never brush teeth or take showers if I didn't remind them.
I'm going to definitely be
I'm going to definitely be more assertive about this, especially now I know I'm not just being picky.
I hadn't even thought of asking OH to get them to wash their hands before dinner. It's something I would personally always do but I know no one else round here does! Some battles don't seem worth fighting but I feel I ought to try with this one.
Of course you are not being
Of course you are not being OTT. Nail this shit down immediately and bare the Skids ass for this nasty disgusting crap. Call him on it each and every time he does it, send him to change his shirt scrub his hands and face vigorously and dowse his hands in sanitizer.
Dad needs to step up and address this crap immediately and consistently.
If the kids are under 10 or
If the kids are under 10 or so, then there should be no problem. Just address the issue to the kids and encourage hand washing and showering.
Over 10 and they all may find it to be insulting. I suggest buying a wonderful smelling soap and let them see you washing your hands with it. They will probably catch on.
Just don't be obnoxious and buy hand-washing posters and all that. If you go to far then the problem will only get worse.