Ive never started a topic just comment here and there. So Ill try to stick to the facts because its
been over 15 years of crap and misery.

DH has a child with Satan basically. SD is now 21 and they divorced in a state where she is not emancipated until 22, Lucky right? I met DH when SD was 3. They had been divorced since SD was 18 months. A little background- BM cheated throughout their marriage and it was well known in his whole family but DH wouldnt consider divorce because his family doesnt believe in it and was always trying to please impossible MIL. There was no sex for last 3 years of marriage then she decides randomly to come home and throw herself at DH after 3 years. Magically she gets pregant and the baby is 7 pounds but a month early. :? Stupid ass DH had always wanted kids but she told him she couldnt have any from a car accident she had. :? So he never found out if SD was his because he "didnt want to know". He just wanted SD. BM proceeded to marry DHs best friend and divorce him later on too.

Fast forward through the next 18 years of stress, police reports, game playing and high conflict. BM
trying to attack me when I was 8 months pregnant, BM calling the house over and over to fight, driving past the house all the time, showing up at my family functions, making
us bust to get SD for visitation. She wouldnt give SD to DH once so after waiting 20 mins he went to the door and banged on it. She called the cops and said he was threatening her. AFter the cops came
and met her they realized she was nuts and he got SD through police but BM asked the police to give DH cupcakes
that her and SD made. SO the cops gave them to my DH and were laughing their asses off because well basically shes nuts. I never ate anything she made. Im not thst stupid. Just one of a million stories really.

Anyway we fought through all this and tried to do the right thing with SD but there is severe PASing and brainwashing from BM. Always had visitation and tried to take SD extra but always got an argument.We moved a couple hours away from SD was 15 and saw hwe much more with no interruptions from BM which made BM even angrier. BM is diagnosed as Borderline personality and Narcasistic.

Sd totally turned on us and our 2 children very suddenly. We were always number 2 after Queen Mommy but she completely changed history and swears we never cared about her at all. Whatever.

I had a feeling my SD was- Ill just say having a personal identity crisis. I dont want to say too much on here because I dont trust them not to find all this- for years for a lot of little reasons but figured if I was right then what she does is her business. When SD finally realized BM went crazy threw her out of the house and was hitting her. We spoke to SD and said whatever makes you happy is ok with us and we
offered to have her move in as she was staying with a relative from BMs side. DH called BM and told her what was going on and that we would be going to court over this and magically she accepted SD to get SD back in the house. SDs story when she wrote on Facebook about it is that BM had a hard time at first with it but came around very quickly and theyre closer than ever. :sick: She never mentioned that we accepted her immediately-why wouldnt we? and has actually called us names and has told DHs family we are not supportive? WTF? We totally were supportive but its like they change history and actually believe it.

Money is a huge motivator for BM btw. Dh has been paying since SD is 18 monthe and we are finaaly almost done .&7 months to go :). Anyway SD now hates us for reasons she cant even tell us when confronted and has
turned DHs family against us as well. My heart is broken for my children because they had a ton of
cousins that they miss but a lot of those cousins have turned against my kids also. Theres way too much more to go into but now my question.

We are able to keep SD on out insurance until 26 or even longer in our state if we wanted to. BM had texted my DH to start shit (still after 18 years!) and he told her he is dropping SD when she is emancipated. BM flipped and said that by law we cant. DH spoke to a lawyer and they told him you are allowed to keep
her on under Obamas new law but he cant be forced and she cant take him to court for it.This is not a mandatory rule. It is something you can do if you want to. Shes emancipated in 7 months from everything!!! BM told DH that SD will never speak to him again if he does it and he told her well then I wont really notice a difference will I ? Its been over a year since SD spoke to him and before that it had been strained for a few years. Bm got a new BF a few years ago and she considered him the best and calls him not Dad but another form of Dad but has called me her fathers wife for years when describing me.

Also they have abused the hell out of the insurance and leave us with 60 to 80 in copays at times
that they refuse to pay which pisses me off. We cant get our medications until the bill is cleared
up so I have to pay it.

Maybe we were horiible all those years but I just dont see it. We just kept moving forward and kept trying to see SD when we were allowed and kept our mouths shut. We figured if we took the high road SD would see we didnt bad mouth BM or call their house to argue. That didnt work out though. I guess the squeaky wheel gets the oil. LOL

I should also say me and DH have always been kind of "doormat" people. Im trying really hard to change that though. We are very non confrontational people but BM and DHs family are loud always yelling and always confronting over everything.

So what would you guys do? Honest opinions. I can take it. Keep her on or drop her and let SD get her own insurance? Sd has never even had a pt job btw and BM hasnt worked in 3 years. They live off BMs bf.