All of a sudden getting cozy with my dd
So My husband and I both have been disengaged from sd18 for about two years after a summer visitation from hell. Me more so than him but contact has been minimal. He attended her graduation from out of state, and that has led to a kumbyya moment. That and child support is officially over soon...I think bm is encouraging her to play nice so she can later ask for $$$ because she thinks we are stupid enough to be snowed by a month and a half of good behavior (not anything beyond three or four pleasant texts and a thank you card...it wasn't like she went all out) but I digress. I have a dd17. Now sd18 has friended and unfriended her on FB probably three times. She just recently friended her again. I have her blocked because bm has access and I felt watched. Anyway...my dd has no real problem with sd but now they are texting and it just makes me weary. Both sd have caused alot of drama...and both hate my guts, despite all my efforts to be nice for the past 17 years...im learning on here that nice is the worst thing to be in these situations because ive taught them how to treat me...I hate the idea that she is undermining me in some way...thoughts? I'm tempted to take a look at dd phone!
Cause she knows the players.
Cause she knows the players.
It's all about the players,
It's all about the players, exactly. I've spent years upon years trying to build a nice step family and create bonds with them but every step of the way bm was in their ear saying we don't love them, etc. there is ALOT of backstory. I did look at phone this morning. Right or wrong, i pay the bill, and like i said, there has been alot of uneeded chaos stemming from her. it was a fact finding mission. What are you and the family doing for summer? Are you going to xyz? It was very transparent...one exchange. She has always been invited in the past but after a summer visitation went wrong and a major falling out with my dh, she hasn't come and to be honest, it's been nice to have peaceful vacations. I'd forgotten what that was like!
You had better address this
You had better address this with your DH now. She's being all "nicey nice" and is probably going to try to get herself included in the vacation trip.
Have your DH prepared that "No" is the only appropriate answer. Not "I'll have to talk to Sambolina" or "maybe" or god forbid "sure". He needs to be ready to give no as an immediate response.