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Is that your business?

doingitforlove's picture

Submitted by doingitforlove on Wed, 05/29/2013 - 8:03am

Forums: 
Adult Stepchildren

Anyone else have this problem: grown SD going through your mail and taking out theirs, but going through it and reading their Dad's and asking questions about it? Like WTF? I don't have my kids go through my mail and read it because I can't wait 3 hours until I get home. Nor do I involve them in my financial affairs, medical affairs, anything. DH tells SD to open the mail after she questions what it's about. (child support letters, medical, etc.)

herewegoagain's picture

Submitted by herewegoagain on Wed, 05/29/2013 - 10:20am

No, sorry, the bills that come to MY house are in my DH's name...they are NONE of anyone else's business, especially not his kid. Just because a bill comes to my DH and NOT me, does not mean that he has a right to show it to anyone outside our home.

doingitforlove's picture

Submitted by doingitforlove on Wed, 05/29/2013 - 10:45am

Boundaries? What? No.....he tells her everything, if SD hadn't opened the letter he would be telling her anyway. It's like she's his BFF. He talks to her about his other kids, his ex-wives, medical problems, the neighbors, her BF (and his family), and God-knows what else about me and my kids, I have a feeling when I find out it will be a deal breaker.

How can I explain to him that that type of relationship is for a man + woman (as in husband and wife) not father - daughter?

20YearsAsAStep-Mom's picture

Submitted by 20YearsAsAStep-Mom on Wed, 05/29/2013 - 2:32pm

Yup. Tell her to stop. Unless mail is addressed to her she is not to open it. DH is really out to lunch on this one.

doingitforlove's picture

Submitted by doingitforlove on Thu, 05/30/2013 - 1:57pm

We don't speak. Otherwise I'd be telling her to stop doing a whole lot more. No interaction whatsoever, not a pick up your shoes, not a hello, not a don't put your stuff there, not allowed to say nothing, I'd have to look outside to see if hell froze over if SD so much as spoke a word to me. This has gone on for years. In my (DH and my) own home.
But I'm glad we don't speak because she is very toxic, 2 faced, negative, cusses like a sailor, etc.