So, I have been dating my fiance for over a year now, and have gotten along great with SD(7). The situation with her is that BM has primary custody, but allows open visitation. However, because my fiance has gone back to school and is working full time, he can only see SD on Saturday nights and Sundays. When we have her, we do everything we can to make her happy. Sometimes, I even go and pick her up myself if fiance is still working late. We go out to eat, go to movies, go bowling, us girls get pedicures; we bond alot, and get along great!! When we told SD that I am expecting, she was ecstatic!! Everytime she gets a chance, she is rubbing my belly and talking to the baby. Since we decided to marry, it has always been in the cards to move her in with us as soon as we can (BM is living with her new baby daddy, who is a lazy, rude POS). However, I am in school full time as well, and also just found out that I am 6 weeks pregnant with our first. My fiance leaves for work at 7am, works until 6:30pm, then goes to auto mechanics school from 7-12 midnight. By the time he arrives home, it is 12:30 at least, and we are both exhausted, so we don't get to spend much time together either. And because I am typically at school from 8am to at least 6pm, and fiance is gone too, who will be there to take care of SD? So until fiance or I finish school, or I have my baby, we cannot possibly have a 7-year-old full time. Because BM is an irresponsible mother, she always drops off SD at MIL's, sometimes even overnight. BM does this because we live maybe 30 minutes away from her, and she refuses to drive to us to drop off SD in the middle of the night so she can go drink and smoke weed with her friends.
Now that you know our entire situation... enter the evil MIL. You know the type... two-faced, manipulative woman who can't keep herself out of other people's business. Well, Monday was exactly 3 weeks from our wedding date. The previous weekend, we had gone to see her, and she was "so excited, oh what should I wear, it's so good that you are doing this, blah blah blah." Monday night, my fiance receives a text message from her saying that she needs to talk to us, because we are ruining SD's life by getting married and having a baby. (Keep in mind, baby was definitely NOT planned.) She says that SD deserves all of his attention, and that she thinks that we should abort the baby and break up. She says that I was a mistake and the baby is a mistake and that SD should not have to pay for fiance's mistake. Well, being pregnant and all, and hearing these things, I kind of freaked out. Ok, I REALLY freaked out. I freaked out so much that I ended up in the ER having a panic attack and not being able to breathe. Wonderful. The next day, MIL calls fiance, but he doesn't answer. She repeatedly calls, and calls, and calls, and finally just sends another text message asking if he got her message from last night. Later that same night she sends another cruel message... saying that I got pregnant on purpose, that I knew what I was doing, that I wanted marriage and wanted fiance all to myself. She says repeatedly that I am only going to push SD away, and that SD is going to be pushed out of our family because of me. She called me a selfish manipulative bitch, and then says, "It's not personal to her, I am only concerned for SD". She also adds, "Are you really in love? Don't marry because you think you have to..."
My fiance, thankfully, does not agree with MIL, and thinks that she is jealous because we are happy and her first marriage ended up in ruins (by her own fault), and her second is pretty much a business agreement.
I am at the end of my rope already with MIL... I told fiance that MIL is no longer welcome in our home, and that I don't want to interact with her at all until she apologizes, and means it!! We also made the decision to ask her not to come to the wedding, and I don't have any further plans to see her or to allow her to see her new grandchild anytime soon unless something drastically changes.