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what do I do

Floyd1978's picture

So I've been disengaging from SD17 for about a week - after finding this site - overheard her talking about me yesterday - bit my tongue (again) - I'm about to do tea for the rest of the family in about half an hour and I really don't want to cook for the ungrateful little cow (won't eat what the rest of us eat, critisizes the way I cook and what I cook, then turns her nose up and eats it like it's about to kill her) but I feel so mean and spiteful

RedWingsFan's picture

You're not being mean and spiteful. If she can't treat you with respect and appreciation, you simply don't do anything for her.

If she won't eat what you eat, tell her that she's free to make herself something. She's 17, not 7. She's practically an adult. She can fix herself something she wants to eat for pete's sake.

Don't worry about her feelings. She obviously doesn't worry about yours!

Shook's picture

Agree Red. SS16 is so rude about food. I used to cook. Not anymore. He'd eat my home baked bread, I mean really eat a third of the loaf & then get a small piece of the store bought bread & say that was the best bread ever. Many times he spit out the food but then the leftovers in fridge would be mostly eaten!! Once we caught him, I made something & said DH made it. He said it was great. Lil jackass. Don't feel bad. She's 17 old enough to use a fire extinguisher.

Floyd1978's picture

Thanks for all your comments they really help - she would only eat branded chips that were double the price of the ones I usually buy - so I kept the empty branded bag and filled it with the cheaper brand chips - she ate them for months. We had tea she had what I gave her and ate it but to be honest I couldn't care less if she hadn't!

Her parting line was "she only respects people who respect her" - which was clearly aimed at me - had to bite my tongue to not say "respect had to be earned"

She'll learn and I can't wait for the.

Reckons she's so bloody independent, hates every one but wants Mommy to take her to give blood and go to the cinema grrrr - sorry just venting now!!

EvilWickedSM's picture

she would only eat branded chips that were double the price of the ones I usually buy - so I kept the empty branded bag and filled it with the cheaper brand chips - she ate them for months.

LMAO....I do this to SD15 as well, and have since she was 9 when I first came in the picture. She is what I like to call a "brand-name brat". Everything had to be brand named or it was worthless. I would keep the expensive cereal containers and refill them with store brand...lol. I have since switched to those plastic cereal containers and just dump the cereal in them. She never has known otherwise...just happily eats it. }:)

Floyd1978's picture

God step parenting is no laughing matter - but some of the posts really make me laugh - I feel like saying as much of a bitch as you can be add 20 years Love can I can be an even bigger bitch

Floyd1978's picture

The routine now is if she chooses something out of the freezer I'll cook it - but I don't break my neck to have it ready at the same time the rest of us eat - if hers take longer to cook and she has to eat on her own tough!!

There is apparently no food in the freezer!! Lol it's full I shop weekly! Yet she won't tell us what she wants in the shopping so frankly she eats what's there and what I buy or starves - I'm past caring.

Disengaging feels so liberating - her pile of clothes is still there - oh and I used all the milk on my cereals this morning whereas normally I would've gone without to make sure there was milk for her - but fussy cow won't drink it if it is a day before the sell by date - I refuse to buy it to tip it away - the list goes on!!

She complained the other day the bulb is gone in her room - my OH wouldn't have a clue - I just said "is it?" And carried on with what I was doing!!

Amberelle11's picture

LOL! I'm loving the whole "filling chips bags and cereal containers" lol! used to cater to that crazy behavior as well...Now I'm at the mentality of what I was brought up with my family (I grew up in a big family) "if you don't like what I made, then you go hungry!" I refuse to play "musical chairs" with making foods until they can "sit" and eat it. I make ONE meal, you don't want it?? too bad for you!

If she wants something else (that I don't already have planned to use for another night) then she is more than welcome to make it herself.

saves my sanity at least! Wink