Shit, shit, and more shit!

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So after a long, brutally honest talk with my husband after my last post, the shit continued... literally! Our toilet became clogged after SD used wet wipes to clean herself up after she shit her pants and proceeded to flush them down our septic system. She stood in the doorway laughing at her father as he plunged the toilet and cleaned up her shit. He never said a word to her. The following week, the toilet became clogged again and it completely flooded our bathroom. We had so much water that it started running down our hallway. After two hours of cleaning that up, the kids noticed that the water had leaked into the basement. They were told not to go near it until we fully got the upstairs cleaned first but his D decided to make a game of it and jump over the dirty shit and piss water. Needless to say, she slipped and fell in it and retracked it through the entire house and down the hallway i had just cleaned and sanitized. She was told to take a shower and about 30 seconds after the shower started, it was turned off and she claimed to have showered in that time. Again, DH said nothing about that. That same weekend, she shit in his sisters pool with several others swimming in it and then clogged the toilet at her house trying to clean herself off. Last weekend, we went to Branson and stayed in a very nice six bedroom home with his family. SD pissed in two of their king sized beds and no one in the family ever said a word. Last night, she shit her pants which smeared all over her bed and her sister unknowingly laid in it. She then proceeded to blame the dog saying that the dog jumped up in her bed, crawled under the covers, and took a shit. The dog weighs 3lbs, and cant even climb stairs yet, much less jump up into a bed, not to mention the dog was in my room with me when this happened. So now today, she has been yelling at the dog all day to take the attention away from herself. I guess the dog climbed in her underwear and took a shit there too. Alot of comments have been made about possible abuse or some sort of medical problem, but there is no abuse and she has already had scans and nothing is wrong with her. It is pure laziness. She will be the first to tell you that she was "too busy" to stop what she is doing to go to the bathroom. If you put her in a diaper, she will soil it and not care, so that is out of the question as well. She has NEVER pooped or peed herself at school and her teachers are constantly saying how great she is which only further tells me that she CAN control it at home and chooses not to. In any other environment but school, she will soil all over herself and sit in it until someone tells her to clean herself up but nobody ever says anything other than that. No punishment, no consequence...EVER! WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE!?! How can something like this be overlooked?!? I am furious!!! SHE IS ALMOST 11 YEARS OLD!!!

OMFG

How on earth can you put up with that?! There is NO WAY I could.

My formerSS13 never used toilet paper, would take a bath right after (so pretty much marinated in poo water). It grossed me out so damn bad. And then he would dig in food with his hands. Bleh.

Not for me, no, not at all.

I'm not sure how in the world

I'm not sure how in the world you put up with this. The lack of support from your husband would be enough for me without even adding the shit!! Good luck.

Right!

Not sure how? How about not sure WHY?

Right!

Not sure how? How about not sure WHY?

I too have no idea why you

I too have no idea why you put up with this, even reading it made me feel nauseated.

Diapers. That is the only way

Diapers. That is the only way. Pull ups or depends if she is too big. Until she can prove that she can actually use a toilet. She has to wear diapers with you. I would also make her purchase them. Give her cash and make her carry them to the check out line.

I'm sorry, I would not have

I'm sorry, I would not have this child in my house. Your husband should not expect any of you to put up with this filth. He needs to see his daughter elsewhere until she is cured of this. She sounds like someone who really belongs in a mental institution.

My daughter is most important

My daughter is most important. That is why i clean and disinfect daily! I stay because it is MY home and my daughter doesnt want to leave, she shouldnt have to and neither should I. I own everything in that house and work my ass off for all of it including the structure itself. It's so easy for others to say they would leave but I cannot abandon a home in my name and there are laws against just throwing him and his kids out. I have asked them all to leave until they can figure their shit out, but they have legal rights there. A few days ago i was literally 2" from SD's face screaming at her for all of it. 2 years of not being able to say a word finally came unleashed. Right before I did it, H tells me that i can talk to her but thats it. I looked at him and said F*** You and just unloaded on him and the SD. Trust me when I say that i have said and tried everything short of the law to remove his kids from the house. To top it off, he went to a lawyer last week and opened a motion to modify a current custody agreement against his ex..... he is asking for full custody. In the meantime his kids are in my home until a hearing. I despise it. I am a full time Cinderella. I told the SD that she is not allowed to sit anywhere in the house unless it is on her own belongings.....no couch, no chairs, no one elses bed. She is not allowed in my daughters room, she is not allowed to wash her shit clothes in my washer, she is not allowed to make herself food or even go near the kitchen where people eat. If she is hungry, H is supposed to make it for her so she doesnt have to touch anything. Diapers do not work. She has no shame in them.

What do you want to do?

What do you want to do? Obviously you shouldn't leave if the home and everything in it is yours. Do you want your husband and his shitting spawn to leave? If so, go see a lawyer. Figure out what steps you need to take to make that happen. The last thing you want is his kids around full time. The status quo can't continue, and the sooner you figure out how to legally get them out of your house, the better off both you and your daughter will be.

So, what does your hubs say

So, what does your hubs say when you tell him to leave until its fixed? Does he think you are joking? Well, obviously he does if he is going to try and get full custody....

If I was in your shoes I would make it abundantly clear he must leave (at least while he has the skids with him) until she is no longer shitting all over. If he refused, I would file for divorce. No way I'm letting someone shit all over my house.

Laws?

I am pretty sure that there are no laws against just throwing him and his kids out.

Actually (I checked) she

Actually (I checked) she pretty much has her hands tied because she can't evict him because he isn't a tenant - this is their marital home. The only hope she has of getting him out of there would be to divorce hom.

So what I'm confused about...

So what I'm confused about... If everything is in your name... Then technically it would be tresspassing if you don't want them there... Can't you just call the cops? Maybe I'm just thinking of it wrong... But legally I don't think they have a claim to YOUR home...

I understand this. I would

I understand this. I would have left my husband years ago if he were not living in my house. I tried to put him and his son out, even called the police thinking they would remove him for how poorly he was treating my kids and me. They would not put him out. They told me, "You should be more careful who you let live with you". (He and I had been dating two years when I let him move in. He was nice until he got visitation soon after moving in with me.) I have to go through a legal eviction which means I need to give him around two months of notice and then after that, he can be removed by force. I have been trying to coordinate this for years. I know how difficult it is.

Some people even say "just sell your house and buy a new one after he is gone" but those people maybe do not live in a large city with a difficult market as I do. I will not sell my house as it is a wonderful investment, and starting over with a new one would be more costly than I can manage right now.

Do you ever wonder what is in the minds of these people who expect someone else to support them while they allow their children to make that person's life terrible, and then they act like spoiled children themselves? I wish I could meet my husband's parents so I could slap them for raising a person who does this! I wish all of us in this situation could do that. If I acted like this, I think my family would be embarrassed.

I don't even know what to say

I don't even know what to say to this except WHAT IN THE ACTUAL F##K?? This little psychopath needs counseling. She has to clean up the mess and no one else, and she will receive serious grounding if she doesn't clean it properly.

It sounds like you have already tried everything. Godspeed, cause that's a hard nope for me.

YOUNG MARINES!

Send her here:

https://www.youngmarines.com/find-a-unit.html

She'll straighten right up!

I have suggested counseling,

I have suggested counseling, some sort of behavioral program, everything i know to suggest but at the end of the day H has to enforce it and it will never happen. I was raised to love all people and things and i have lived by that until now. I have never had this much anger and resentment in my life. I want them out of my f****** house!! I walked in her room today and 3 of MY comforters are wadded up in her floor. When i asked her why, she said because her sister said they smell like pee so she keeps getting clean ones. WTF! I hate admitting this out loud but I completely despise all of them.

He clearly doesn't think you

He clearly doesn't think you are "being serious" when you tell him to leave until her shitty problems are over. If he refuses (and continues to seek MORE custody) you have no choice but to file for divorce... well, or continue to subject yourself and your daughter to shit and piss all over YOUR house.

Big nope. I would be calling an attorney.

I think it's time to take

I think it's time to take legal action, if need be. You cannot go on like this.

What did your husband say when you told him that they need to leave until this gets resolved?

...but at the end of the day

...but at the end of the day H has to enforce it and it will never happen.

Apparently, you've lost faith in him.

I was raised to love all people and things and i have lived by that until now.

My counselor said to me what I'll say to you: To properly love others, you need to first love yourself. Set that boundary. This is a no s**t home. No sewage. It's UNSPEAKABLE. I recommend that you consider not threatening them, but simply saying "The expectation of each of you is a simple constant. And this behavior is completely unacceptable in any setting. Stop it NOW."

Also, ASAP, start taking pics of the damage.

Also, start photographing your assets and belongings because you're headed for splitsville, I'm afraid...

THEN before the end of this week, get a consult from a divorce attorney. If things haven't improved by the end of the week, do what you need to do. This situation is untenable for any healthy, self-respecting person.

And please keep us posted!

Tell him that his children

Tell him that his children are not coming back to your home. EVER. You are not stopping him from seeing them but you are NOT going to tolerate their messes. He wants to see his kids, he goes elsewhere. End of story. You might not be able to get him out but you CAN stop visitation in your home. They are HIS responsibility, let him find a solution.

Time for you to see a lawyer

Time for you to see a lawyer to get him removed from your house, until then get a storage unit for all your's and your dd personnel belongings, your furniture and replace with cheap garage sale bits until you can remove these disgusting people from your life.

DW is a Flight Attendant.

She works with many guys who are non-hetero.

One guy was on a trip and he and several other like-minded gentlemen gathered in one of their hotel rooms for a "poo party," where 4-10 of them were fully unclothed, and poo'd and smeared all over one another and everything in the room. Apparently, it's a thing.

Ugh

Gag me, whoah that is so gross.

SD sounds absolutely

SD sounds absolutely mentally disturbed.

I know its probably impossible to think rationally right now but you need to start gathering some evidence if you want them out. I would document this chaos if I were you. Next time she shits everywhere get your phone and start recording it. Record the filth, the damage she did to your basement, etc. Very calmly, no judgment in your voice, simply document.

This girl is creating an environment that is mentally and physically unhealthy to the other kids. I would focus on that when you write your plea to the judge or the cops or whomever you are reaching out to for help. If you were just throwing your dh out in the streets for infidelity or whatever it would be different. But you have a real reason!! Protecting your bio child from living in a filthy, mentally unstable environment.

Consult an attorney and make sure you show the videos! Im sure the law will back you up on this one. And if dh is serious about obtaining full custody of SD i would also file for divorce immediately. She would never be allowed in my home. Period.

Thank you so much for all of

Thank you so much for all of the advice. When I tell H to leave, he promises me that next time it happens he will take care of it. When next time does happen, its the same thing over and over again. My only option out is a divorce and in the meantime since he will not leave with his children, I have to stay elsewhere with my child. It is extemely hard to trust those kids in my home when i am not there. They are very distructive. I am emotionally and physically drained. When i am not working, I spend all of my time cleaning and disinfecting the house. The icing on the cake is that I am a huge germaphobe and I have been clinically diagnosed with OCD when it comes to cleanliness with myself and my environment so this issue is literally f****** with my head. I can not comprehend how any of this is ok in the eyes of anyone. He will get full custody of those kids, I have no doubt about that, and that is something that I know I can not accept. I have done a lot of research on psychopaths and all joking aside, it is the description of his daughter on every level. I have begged him to get counseling for her and for himself as a father but nothing comes of it. She is his princess...the golden child... she does no wrong. I regret my marriage and I wish I knew then what I know now. I often wonder if she does these things to spite me because it is obvious she doesn't like me and doesn't want me with her father.

Thank you so much for all of

Oh my gosh. I went and found

Oh my gosh. I went and found your older post to gain some perspective. You NEED to take action TODAY. Call a lawyer. Your husband is a sick man, spying on you with binoculars at work and literally allowing his children to shit all over you. You seem scared of him. You say you're not allowed to do anything about the situation. HELL TO THE NO!!!!! You and your daughter are worth far more than this. My guess is that those girls are victims of some serious abuse. Sociopathic behaviour is not common in females, but the older one is certainly flirting with it. Call a lawyer, then call child protective services. Those kids need help, but you don't need to be the martyr to provide it. I believe you are in a truly dangerous situation, and as a mother, it is your responsibility to your daughter to gtfo immediately. Talk to a lawyer. Find out your rights. Plan carefully and take every step to protect yourself, your daughter, and your belongings. Your husband and his psycho mother sound like they would be very vindictive. I know how easy it is for others to say, just leave, but I truly worry for the well-being of you and your little girl, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Stay strong, sister. You can do this.

PADDLE... meet kid ass!

Lather, rinse, repeat.... each and every time she pulls that crap. Pun fully intended.

As for diapers... she should be wearing them 24/7. Public humiliation has direct effect on crappy behavior perpetrated by an 11yo. So, she doesn't shit herself at school... that tells me that this is willful behavior and at school is where she needs to be in a diaper so her peers can pile on the ridicule and teasing. Bet she knocks it off immediately if she gets delivered to school in a diaper and is not allowed to take it off.

Bring the abject misery. The behavior will change.

Trust me. It works.

As for your stalker of a husband... next time the kids are with their mom and he leaves the house... call the locksmith and rekey the locks. Staple the divorce papers to the front door, get your CHG license and buy a gun. Use it if you have too. Why would you tolerate your own child being exposed to this shitty shallow and polluted gene pool much less force that exposure by continuing to tolerate the presence of this sick bastard and his toxic crotch nuggets.

Just my opinion of course.

Take care of you.

Good luck.

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Shit, shit, and more shit!