Should have never gotten married
I've been married for a year now, and played daddy to my wife's two young children (their bio dads are non existent) . The eldest is 5, but he was an absolute nightmare when I first met him. I mean Nanny 911 bad. The youngest is no problem, she's in her terrible twos now, but nothing out of the normal. I cook, provide, care, bathe the kids, clean the house consistently and do anything a good husband does. My wife won't do anything but bitch all day. I can be at work and she will message me about me not cleaning the kitchen the night before. Mind you she cleans on average once a month. If that. She makes more than me, but I still put up half the money, to me it's just less petty cash. I fixed her bratty son by showing him some respect, manners and discipline. Something she completely failed at. Btw she gives him preferential treatment over my SD, who is only 2. She'll make the girl go on naps alone (the kids share a room) and take him to our bedroom to nap with her, only buy him toys when they go to the Store, tell the girl to leave her alone when she's laying down but the boy is allowed. When the girl whines my wife blows a fuse, but when he did it (more frequently and a little less than a year ago) she would hug him and give him what he wanted, no spankings for him. Every time we argue, she'll say that she deserves better and she's not gonna lower her standards to make me feel better. I'm tired of her shit and her lack of appreciation for someone who raises her kids like they were mine despite the fact they're not. I'm the person who put order and organization in that household, I never disrespected or even cursed at her, not even raised my voice and have been nothing but physically and emotionally loving to her. So now I say fuck her. Let her survive without me, remind her of how shitty things were when I wasn't in the picture. Being a step father is tough, but having an ungrateful bitch of a wife makes it worse.
For the kids sake I wish it
For the kids sake I wish it was different, but sadly I do feel it's beyond repair
This after a year of
This after a year of marriage. Pretty much still the honeymoon faze. This is as good as it gets. People in their first year of marriage are pretty much still getting to know each other. Still on their best behaviour. If this is her best behaviour, heaven help you. Be careful you don't become father number 3 while you are working this out. But if your gut says go. Go now, the longer you leave it, the harder it gets.
If you are less than a year
If you are less than a year into your marriage, it's your need to tell her that this was not what I was expecting and that you deserve better than what is going on. You cannot be married to the troubles and to her at the same time.
Sadly, if I had my choice, I wouldn't have gotten married either and just did things on my own. I feel as though I have no say so in what is going on and that things are "because they've always been that way". If I were you, I'd find a place to go and just deal with an attorney. The legal documents should say what you need to say now; it's business, not personal.
Whatever you do, if you divorce, make it business only. You've been through enough emotionally and it's time you reward yourself with some honest to goodness quiet.
Dude I wish my wife acted
Dude I wish my wife acted like that in the beginning instead sse waited until she had her claws on me financialy. I wish I would have found thus forum 5 years ago my life would be different. For what its worth you gotta talk with her about what your feeling. If you dont then your kind of hiding with your tail between your legs. If it works great if not GET THR F!@$ out!
ummm...what they said. this
ummm...what they said. this road is hard enough and adding what you described I would think dealing with this sooner rather than later will save you and everyone else even greater heartache. If you think you can own the situation and reset boundaries thats cool too. Good luck whichever path you take...remember life is to short to spend it miserable. I try to remind myself of that when life sucks and I need to make a change.
May I put my 2 cents worth
May I put my 2 cents worth in?
Just leave quietly and file for divorce. Find your own place, don't tell her anything-just leave. Don't get into any arguements, don't talk to anyone except an attorney and remember this, a divorce should be kept on a professional level with no feelings after all she's done.
Counseling will not help this situation. It's best if you leave quietly and go on with your life. YOU DESERVE BETTER!!!!!!!!
Where were you when I
Where were you when I couldn't find a decent single man????
Get out of there. There are tons of great ladies, some with kids and some without, just DYING for a good guy they can love back. Go get yourself one!
I fully agree with LadyG. I
I fully agree with LadyG. I did what she suggested and it was easier than I thought.