I want to get you all caught up with what is happening.
My step daughter is 7 soon to be 8. She has anxiety which is being dealt with. (let me assure you it is a hard and stressful thing to deal with, but as a parent i try my best)
She worry's a lot and has some issues that we as a family are figuring out. Me and my fiance (bio mother) have our ups and downs and disagreements (i will get to that later) we try to work together but it sometimes does not work like we hope for. The bio father is barely in the picture he is always late with child support, hates me because im with his ex of 8 years ago, he calls the mother of his child all the names in the book, he never sees his kid unless its right for him. That is basically the rant for him for now.

Today i just got home from the school she attends, me and her mother made a meeting with the principal to see what arrangements we can make for our daughter due to the fact we found out last night that she is being bullied. Now from what she has told us this is not an on going bullying, we found out at least 4 different stories that go as far back as September so its not like she is being bullied every day. We are waiting to hear back from the school to see if we can have her switch classes. A big issue with me is her anxiety, is this going to trigger it even worse, will this make things better or are we making a wrong choice. Its hard as a parent to find out these things have happened so of course her mother was frantic, as a step parent i was sitting in that meeting trying to piece together a better solution. (My fiance can be drastic at times) So i really didn't say much. I've been at home with my daughter the past few days a break from work so i have got to spend a lot of down time with her. Now in these few days she was telling em some pretty out of this world stories. These are not stories children usually make up, here are a few she told me.

1. When she was younger apparently her father was in jail for stealing, she told me this is what her mother had told her. She said this is the reason why she could not talk to him. she said now i quote "When i was little my daddy was in jail, mommy told me this is why i could not talk to him. He was in jail because he was hungry and had no money for food so he went to the store and stole candy. Then he was arrested." So this leads me to believe there was an issue when she was younger that made it so her father wasn't around which does not surprise me in the least.

2. Apparently she had to sleep in the garage with her cat. This is what she told me, keep in mind i wasn't around for this period in her life when she is telling me these stories, and Chico is the cat they use to have and Nick was the ex bf after my fiance and the bio father split up. "When i was little my cat Chico broke all of his legs so i had to help him around the house. Nick didn't like Chico because he was allergic. So he made him sleep in the garage all the time, so when he hurt himself my mommy told me i had to sleep in the garage with him so he didn't fall and hurt himself. i had to carry him everywhere" As a parent that is a scary thought. Why would someone make a 3 year old sleep in a garage, i do not think this happened at all but i just said oh really to her after she was done telling me.

There were a few more but i just can't seem to remember at this time. So when my Fiance came home from work of course i addressed her with the situation, i was dead serious telling her these supposed real stories. When i was finished she kind of just chuckled and carried on with dinner. Now your serious right? Like you just laughed at that? That is not cute, that is not funny. My SD does see a Councillor, and if these stories are lies you should be telling her Councillor about this so it doesn't come as a big surprise. Like i said before, these aren't just tiny little fibs these are legit accusations, i wasn't going to sit there and just slam her stories down i thought a conversation with her mom may help, but it clearly didn't.

This is were i get to the part of the story as my perspective. I understand my limits as a step father, But i was raised in a strict house, my fiance literally lets our daughter get away with ANYTHING and i mean ANYTHING. last night we put her to bed at 8:30, that child was not asleep till almost 12:15 am. I am strongly AGAINST the fact of a 7 year old falling asleep at that time. And why is she up late well here are the reasons.

1. She has a tablet she plays on 24/7. I dare you to take it away, the fit she has is crazy, its sick. I think she should only have an hour or so after school on her tablet then boom take it away.

2. She always has a reason why she is out of bed, if it were me i would say i dont care back to bed now, she has had a bath, a snack, read a book, has a movie on, was tucked in, went to the bathroom there is nothing you need at 11:00 at night. i think going to bed at 8 and sleeping by 8:30-9 is a good time for a 7 year old. Her mom just lets her do what she wants, then she is tired in the morning and her mom keeps her home from school in the morning, damn i don't care it was your fault you stayed up get up and get dressed were going to school.

3. The consistency she has is horrific. Her mom made her an after school schedule to follow, which did help with her anxiety when it was being followed. Im looking at that schedule right now and im about to tear it down off the wall which i may, that schedule has been collecting dust for 2 months now. When ever i bring it up my fiance gets mad at me. Being consistent is hard for both the kid and parents trust me.

Now why does she not listen? Let me tell you. She is 7 years old with an xbox, 42" tv in her room, 2 tablets, plays on a phone (Not mine) whenever she has a chance, takes mine or my fiances laptop (she had mine for 24 hours no joke the other day). She gets what she wants, its coming up Christmas i have bought her maybe 10 things because she always gets something. Anytime my fiance goes to Walmart she gets her a toy. I find that ridiculous. I love my SD but i will be the first to say she is spoiled as all hell. She is a brat. Again i love her. Here is a recent example, like i said earlier there are problems at school so we kept her home today, i woke up this morning with a very sore neck, (i was in a car accident a few years ago and did not get any medical attention which was my fault. I woke up and stretched and boom there goes my neck. I still can't move it. Anyway im struggling to get dressed, and in flies my SD "I wanna play can we play?" in legit painful response is ay no i hurt myself, she goes flying out of the room crying her mom asks what happens, guess who is in trouble? Yup... Me. I tell her my neck is sore she does not care. Well i stood up for myself, she is home from school this is no vacation plus i am in a lot of pain. Now i always think, am i a bad parent? im to strict sometimes, but wait this child has no strict parent or any adult figure for that matter.

I can go on with lists of things but this is the current issue. This is why me and my fiance don't see eye to eye. I don't think every child needs a toy each visit to the store. I don't think a child should be falling asleep at 12 because they were on their tablet then keep them home from school in the morning because they were tired. A child with anxiety needs consistency, and that is the bottom line.