We just had a nice weekend at my DD & SIL to celebrate GD 2 birthday. And the next day on Sunday to have Christmas with my adult kids. It was an enjoyable time. My OS and Dil and YS and fiancé stayed to visit after the birthday party. We all talked and had a great time. Then spent about 4 hrs together on Sunday for brunch and opening gifts. The GD was well behaved and sweet to watch play with her new things and interact with everyone. She knows who DH and I are even though she doesn't say our grandparent names yet.

I had done all the shopping, wrapping and planning on my own. I even used the money I earned from a job this fall to pay for the gifts for my family. Not that DH wanted me to but I wanted to keep it separate this year. The rest of that money is for my school tuition for the spring.

DH has already been told previously that I am not doing anything for the skids this year. I also am not seeing them. They are banned from our house and he has plans to see them next weekend for brunch out and to go to YSD house to exchange gifts. This is the one who has been harassing DH since August about. What to give her and her son. Yet she never reciprocates anything.
Oh. And DH's parents are coming to stay with us for the weekend and they will be included in this party that excludes me. Originally it was just to be a brunch out, now it will be the whole afternoon. Anyway, no problem. I'll treat myself to a movie.

The problem is that as we are driving home from my families nice holiday, DH just has to say.....he has to arrange his work time this week so he can get home in time for us to go shopping ( for the skids and SGkids). Mind you he has been working non stop for months doing his job plus the one of someone fired in July. Bringing it home everyday, non stop literally. At first I start to say I do not want to get into it an ruin my happy mood. Then I think. Just get it over with. It is the 'elephant' in the car so to speak.
So I tell him again. DH. I am not going shopping with you for them. He says...you can just be there for moral support, consultation, since You am so good at picking gifts. I say no. I will not be able to do that this year. I said if I have nothing to do with it then they cannot blame me if they don't like something or think he spent to little or whatever.

I told him what I did for my family as far as how much was spent per person and that the guys just got the amount in cash to spend as they like. DH was there when the gifts were opened, I just wanted him to understand how it was divided. Basically $50 per person, and then $50 per couple/family designated for them to do a fun activity with. My DD, Dil, and Fdil were given pj's, a silver and blue diamond necklace that I got a really good deal on ( $20) and toiletries. Girls are easier to buy for I think. And the GD 2 was given some clothes and will have the kids table and chairs that belonged to my kids as soon as I finish the refinishing this week.

I have told DH my opinion that two of his daughters do not deserve a gift this year due to their behavior plus thousands was spent on MSD for bailing her out of jail, financial ruin, buying a used car, putting her in an apt to get her ass out of my basement, etc. ( she is supposed to pay it back but I doubt she ever will, DH did not make her sign anything. And the ungrateful MSD is not even likely to show up to see him next Saturday. YSD is the demanding brat that spoils the joy of Christmas months ahead of time with her telling what to get, and if he isn't getting it let her know and BM will get it. Blah blah....and on and on it goes. DH just ignores her and tells me he will buy what he wants for GS 22months.

Yet DH has the nerve to ask me to help him shop for THem. The bitches who have been telling him since Spring to divorce me.
If he asks me again, I will have to flip out on him.
He is clueless about what to shop for. I have told him my opinion. I am not going with him. Maybe he can wait till Friday night and his parents can help him. I don't even want to be around them at this time.

I had another dream last night about the family situation. One of my dreads about seeing DH's parents is that I think they will say something to me one day about the skid situation and my banning them from my home and life. But in this dream I was able to speak up for myself. It was not the typical nightmare where I was invisible and could not speak. Maybe it came from telling DH no last night on the way home them dropping the subject and going on with my evening.

Tomorrow is counseling.
I have not been able to watch anything about the school shooting yet. Every time I hear a little about it, I just think of MSD threatening to kill me in that text she sent to DH months ago. He did not take it seriously. I wonder with the horrible things happening in this world, how can you not take something seriously of that nature.

I don't know what the future holds for DH and me. But I know it does not hold shopping together for his daughters.

Hang strong SM's. Give yourselves a treat this year. Reclaim your joy in the season. Remember it is the birth of Christ we are celebrating.
There was one post I read about a family who gives three gifts to their children each year, because that is the number of gifts the wise men brought to the Christ child. I thought that was a lovely way to help teach the children the true meaning of Christmas.

Merry Christmas to all!