Disney trip not enough for Christmas???
Okay, so my DH and I decide to take his 4 kids (ss15, ss13, ss9, and sd5) to Disney this December. They've never been there... Hubby and I decided months ago to do this and we agreed since it was expensive to take 6 people to Disney, that the kids would each get one souvenir at Disney and then a couple other gifts for Christmas... but not near the crap they got last year.
Well, ss9 had the hardest time with this when we told them that Disney was their big gift and only a couple of others would follow. He got really upset, had tears in his eyes, and complained that he didn't want to go to Disney if it meant that he wasn't going to get a lot of gifts. First of all... WHAT A SPOILED UNGRATEFUL BRAT!!!!!!! This attitude went on for several weeks and a couple of the other kids seemed okay, but slightly disappointed with the whole idea.
So, we go to Disney. BTW, had a terrible time!!!! All they did was bitch, fight, moan, groan, complain, and whine the whole time! I can't believe I paid good money to go through that. It is like it was impossible for them to be happy to be there or grateful that we did this for them.
Christmas shopping commenced after we got home from the trip and sure enough... DH does not stick to our agreement. He still spent several hundred dollars on each kid! I know that he didn't want them to feel slighted or that they were missing out. I tried to explain to him that he needed to teach his kids that Christmas wasn't about gifts. While we were shopping, he mentioned that he didn't know what to buy them because he said that they wouldn't be satisfied. If that's the case, then don't buy them anything.
I got up the nerve to ask my husband if he had any clue how much money he spent. He said he knew and that and he didn't care. I reminded him of our "agreement" and again all I got was "I know and it doesn't matter." Matters to me when half the money in the checkbook is mine!!!!
Anybody got a take on this?
Be and ass, take the rest of
Be and ass, take the rest of the money left in the account and go buy you some really nice for under the tree!! Let him deal with the mess it makes
and when he whines it was bill money tell him "I know and it doesn't matter."!!
You're not alone with the let
You're not alone with the let down Disney Experience with Skids. I too had my own frustrating let down. Thinking how much fun they will have and the bonding experience I was excited. But I too was also let down due to complaining and moaning and groaning. Probably wont plan another vacation with them until they are a bit older.
Your DH should have stuck to what you guys agreed to. I know Disney is no cheap expense and your right on Christmas isn't about gifts! It's about being together being thankful for the things you have and giving to others.
Hope you find some joy this season and just know you did what you could for these children whether they recognize it or not.
Its hard. It sucks. Kids
Its hard. It sucks. Kids are selfish.
um....in my personal opinion,
um....in my personal opinion, an 8 year old is not totally old enough to understand the value and difference (truly) of an unwrappable gift vs a vacation. i would NEVER give a child that option until they are 16-18...then "take your pick" at that age i would've EXPECTED that response if nothing under the tree.
dont' get me wrong i TOTALLY see where you're coming from
but hubby could've followed
but hubby could've followed through with his agreement
Thanks for all your
Thanks for all your responses. I totally agree that 9 year olds aren't mature and quite honestly, in my opinion, he is not emotionally or mentally 9... more like 5. I think this comes from his BM babying him so much over the years. And, yes, he doesn't understand the value of money. But we did tell him that he would still get gifts under the tree... just not as many as last year because of paying for the trip. Plus he got stuff at Disney. It wasn't like we were telling him that he wouldn't get anything at all.
Overall, I think I might be more upset with my DH for not sticking to our agreement... and it almost seems like he feels he needs to "buy" the kids to try and make them happy. Either that or it's a pissing match between him and BM's. And the reason I say that is because he told me at Disney that he was going to make sure that the 9 year old had the biggest/best time of his life so that he would go home to his BM and not shut up about it. Ridiculous if you ask me.
All in all... I'm not opposed to getting children gifts. I just don't think that they need the world under the tree. I mean... Jesus only got 3 gifts. What makes these kids think that they are entitled to more gifts than God? Just a question...
we took skids to disney this
we took skids to disney this past summer. IT was a nitemare.,whinning and complaining and frig it was HOT! It was a total chore and i willNEVER EVER do that again. What was I thinking.
I agree that young kids dont know the difference between a trip and presents. Gotta wait to they are older. THan you dont want to go to disney. You take them on a cruise and they have all these teen things to do you never see them, while you relax.
My husband also over spends for the holidays on his kids...but its his cash that he saves (separate from household fund) so whatever. He also buys stuff for kids to get there mom. Not once in 6 years has there mom bought something for him from the kids! That really fries my butt!