Who Here is Big into Hosting PLAYDATES?
Where are the playdate moms here? 
I never heard of playdates till a couple years back when I started being around more moms, so I know they are a newer thing these days. My parents were both worker bees (weekdays, nights, and weekends) and they really didn’t have time to plan birthday parties or playdates, so it was left up to me and my sisters to entertain ourselves outside.
A colleague of mine hosted a playdate, and invited me to bring BF’s daughter, which I voluntarily did….and to be frank I found it too formal. The host mom had snacks and drinks for everybody, kids and moms. But it turned out to be like a social event for moms and kids, I barely knew any of the moms but my colleague said that’s a great way to get to know other moms (particularly when you are a new mom) and for kids to make friends.
My closest memory of a playdate from my childhood consisted of 10 kids playing baseball in the street while a bbq was going with the adults chit chatting over lemonade and beer on our block. This playdate I attended…..had invitations and checklists, scheduled activities and crafts…..hors d’oeuvres and caviar, butlers and valets (lol j/k).
So what is it that distinguishes these playdates and what makes them ideal for rearing kids today?
I host playdates and attend
I host playdates and attend playdates. They aren't formal at all. Sometimes we put out snacks - pretzels, crackers, etc. But mostly we just let the kids play and the women chat about life in general, from our kids, to our dhs, to our families, to vacations, etc. I love it. I work from home so it is my only real interaction with adults outside my dh during the week. And my son is very social and loves the other kids.
Ideally, kids would meet other kids in the neighborhood and go out and play, but my kid is 2. He isn't going to be trolling the neighborhood. And most of the other moms work and the kids are in daycare. This a way for him to socialize without having to be out of the house at 6am and away from me for 11-12 hours.
I think older kids should be responsible for their own friendships. Not so say they shouldn't be allowed to have a friend over for a 'playdate' but it should be on them to choose a friend and ask, not the parent to arrange everything. That is just awkward. And I think it is weird that parents are involved with the older kids. I mean, SD used to have friends over. Their parents dropped them off (this is about age 6). And I agree that kids should be outside finding shit to do. She really has no friends now, so it isn't an issue anymore.
When my D14 was younger I
When my D14 was younger I would schedule play dates, but they weren't that formal.
My D14 was an only child for a long time, and my husband and I really didn't want her playing with the kids from the apartment complex that we lived in, they were pretty rough.
So when she developed a friendship with a girl from school, I'd contact that girl's parent and ask if I could have her over for a Saturday afternoon to play with my daughter.
Sometimes I'd have a playdate with a co-worker who had kids close in age to mine. Sometimes the girl would be a only child like mine, or only had brothers. The play dates were more for the kids to socialize and have someone their own age to play with for a change.
It's funny, there was one girl that my D14 used to be friends with in elementary school and had several play dates over the years. Her mom and I got to be good friends, and now our daughters are in high school and hardly ever hang out.
I host a playdate once for
I host a playdate once for every 10 my daughter attends - yes, I am one of those moms - I work full time, there are 4 kids in this household, I can barely get my kid to a playdate let alone stay or host.
To be honest, I feel like a failure because I am not a playdate hostess, I feel guilty sending my kid because I don't reciprocate.
I hate playdates - lol