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Temper tantrums

mojona's picture

I know this is a blog for step moms but i really don't know where else to go. My daughter is nearly 18 months now and today her teacher told me that she got upset with another girl in her class and strangled her. she also hits the other children and when she gets angry she sometimes slaps her mouth. I find this very disturbing and am not sure what to do . I have no idea what caused this behavior, she does not get spanked i have never slapped her mouth and when she gets naughty i tell her no and give her a time out. I'm worried that it might be that the daycare people might be doing something to cause this behavior. Any kind of advice would be of great help.

smurfy1smile's picture

This is the time before the terrible 2's. Kids are struggling with dependance and independance. I need mom/dad but I don't need mom/dad. Toddlers play more next to each other than with each other. Ever hear of the toddler rules - if its near me, its mine, if I have the same thing at home, its mine, if I have part of a toy, all the parts are mine....Sorry I can't recall the rest since my youngest is 7.

I would drop in unannouced at daycare once or twice and see if you see anything amiss. I would also look for other care. Your daughter may be stressed in this situation and does not have the words to express her needs, wants or frustrations. Is the center large, with lots of kids? Do you notice lots of turn around on employees and other kids? You may want to look into a smaller place for her like a family daycare.

Elizabeth's picture

I have a little one just about that age, and she mimics everything her big sister does. Big sister hits, so little sister hits. I would guess that your daughter has seen another kid at daycare doing the things you describe. That age is so impressionable, and they don't understand the consequences of their actions.

One thing that has helped me is to encourage my childrens' verbal development. Teach them how to express themselves through words instead of actions. Even one your daughter's age can do that. My youngest daughter has quite the vocabulary already. If they can say what they want, or why they are upset, they are less likely to lash out. But it will be important that someone is listening and responding!

Sita Tara's picture

a few signs. Toddlers LOVE signing and there are a ton of books out there. I think it helped my 2 year old grasp words even more quickly. The first sign she learned was "I love you" (thumb, forefinger, pinky only.) She gives this to everyone now when they're leaving our house or saying goodnight to her.

Peace, love, and red wine